biphobia: what it looks like

[rioters bloc]

i was going to write an article on this for a publication but didn't have time so i got my friend to write it instead


So what is this biphobia, you ask. Simply put, biphobia is the perpetuation of stereotypes of what bisexuals are and do, and discrimination against bisexuals because of their sexual orientation. Unfortunately, being bisexual opens you up to discrimination from both queer and straight communities. Essentially, you have to come out of a ‘double closet’. It is almost always assumed that if you are part of the queer community, than you are either gay or lesbian. At times I have been more accepted within heterosexual communities than by queer ones.

There is a common misunderstanding that bisexuals are just going through a phase and confused about their sexuality. I had had a woman tell me that she too used to think she was bisexual before she realised that she was a lesbian, and therefore I too must be a lesbian and it was only a matter of time until I figured it out. Yes, this comment from a queer woman. Whatever happened to queer solidarity? It seems to me that often the queer community accept bis by name only. Once you try and open up debate about bisexual politics, everything suddenly goes extremely quiet. I am sick of token representation of bisexuals in the queer community. Its hard enough just to get the word bisexual put into a gay and lesbian organisation let alone try and get the queer community to fight against bisexual oppression.

Another common misunderstanding is that if you’re bisexual you don’t believe in monogamy and will never commit. Although there are some, that’s true of all sexualities. Monogamy doesn’t simply apply to monosexual sexualities.

One big issue that comes from heterosexual men in particular is the notion that if you’re a bi female you must be available. That’s right, if you’re bi you must want to sleep with everyone and you must also want to have threesomes with every man you meet. Not only is this inherently sexist, but also biphobic. I’ve also been told that I’m only bi because it’s trendy or fashionable. My sexuality is not based on passing fads, it’s a core part of my identity.

One big idea that comes from the queer community is that of heterosexual privilege. Yes, I agree that we can walk down the street holding hands with a partner of the opposite sex, but we stuffer equally when we’re with someone from the same sex as us.

My favourite saying at the moment is, “no, I’m bisexual – you’re confused”. To me, it encapsulates a few main ideas that drive biphobia. One big issue for bisexuals is visibility. As mentioned, it is usually assumed that you’re gay or straight. We live in a society that is based on dichotomies; if it’s not black it must be white, if you arent straight you must be homosexual, and if you aren’t a woman you must be a man. The list goes on. Bisexuals actually challenge the very legitimacy of binary opposites. we challenge the very basis of understanding the world in terms of dominant western philosophy – dialectical materialism.

The systems of patriarchy and hetrosexism also perpetuate biphobia. the only way biphobia can be challenged is if more people stand up and say proudly that yes, they are bisexual, and no, they’re not confused. We need to organise as bisexuals and reassert our rights. I feel it cannot be done in isolation and we need to need to encourage the queer community to take up issues of biphobia because it is the same systems of heterosexism, capitalism, and patriarchy that oppress all people who aren’t heterosexual.

[Sentinel]

Excellent article! This in particular is very interesting, and the key issue in this dilemma i.m.o.:

We live in a society that is based on dichotomies; if it’s not black it must be white, if you arent straight you must be homosexual, and if you aren’t a woman you must be a man. The list goes on. Bisexuals actually challenge the very legitimacy of binary opposites. we challenge the very basis of understanding the world in terms of dominant western philosophy – dialectical materialism.

The blind dividing of everything in opposites is the core of bigotry in peoples minds.
I'm certainly not praising compromising in everything here.

The interests of the ruling class and the working class for an example are binary opposite.

But individuals must realise that there are shades between black and white when they observe the world. Otherwise they reduce themselves to nothing but bigots.