The LORD moons Moses

[redstar2000]

Exodus

33:17 And the LORD said unto Moses, I will do this thing also that thou hast spoken: for thou hast found grace in my sight, and I know thee by name.

33:18 And he said, I beseech thee, shew me thy glory.

33:19 And he said, I will make all my goodness pass before thee, and I will proclaim the name of the LORD before thee; and will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will shew mercy on whom I will shew mercy.

33:20 And he said, Thou canst not see my face: for there shall no man see me, and live.

33:21 And the LORD said, Behold, [there is] a place by me, and thou shalt stand upon a rock:

33:22 And it shall come to pass, while my glory passeth by, that I will put thee in a clift of the rock, and will cover thee with my hand while I pass by:

33:23 And I will take away mine hand, and thou shalt see my back parts: but my face shall not be seen.

-------------------------------------

It must have been quite a sight!

[LSD]

!

Wow, so God has "back parts"?

What happened to God being mysterious and great? Wouldn't what he did be considered sexual harrasment in most countries?

And on a purely theological basis, if God is omnipotent and designed the universe and all that exists within it, why did he "invent" the rule that no human can see his face? It seems that in this passage God is frustrated by being unable to show Mosses his face and comes up with this ass compromise... but why didn't God just "snap his fingers" and make Mosses able to see his "glory"?

hmm...seeing God's "glory"...now that's a distrubing though..

[Exploited Class]

Well I think the reason why he doesn't show Moses his face is because, now follow me here, he is really ugly.

Think about it, he makes us fairly attractive and in his image but not "exactly a clone". Now who made God? We don't know and perhaps he was created like many superheroes' origin stories, through a freak accident, leaving him scared like darkman or bald like Lex Luther?

Or and this is my other idea.

God is a cross dresser and is in the closet. He had makeup on and wasn't ready for Moses to ask to see him and he didn't have time to take off his makeup. So he just showed him his backside. They say most cross dressers are stereotypical powerful men like men in the military, firemen and policemen. What is more powerful than a god? Nothing, except the most powerfully fabu looking cross dresser from alpha to omega!

[redstar2000]

Originally posted by Exploited Class
Well I think the reason why he doesn't show Moses his face is because, now follow me here, he is really ugly.

A brilliant theory!

Hear, O Israel, the LORD thy GOD is butt-ugly.

That's so good it has to be true!

[bed_of_nails]

And then God took a shit upon thee ground, and the pinched loaf landed upon his son.

And God saideth to thee "Sorry kid".

[Don't Change Your Name]

Pathetic.

There is people who take that shit SERIOUSLY.

[bed_of_nails]

Who wouldnt take it seriously? I mean 'cmon, its fucking GOD mooning Moses.