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are asexuals really discriminated against aside from people just not understanding what it is? to be totally honest, most of the bigoted statements listed are basically people showing that they have no idea what the definition of asexuality even is, as opposed to actually opposing it.
Perhaps it is not discrimination, but just yesterday in a discussion the topic of my asexuality somehow came up and then the other person said I have nothing to live for since I'm not interested in sex. I facepalmed pretty hard.
I'm not sure if this actually happens, but I know in many religious groups marriage is viewed as a pretty big thing so I'm sure there's huge amounts of pressure for marriage, which many asexuals obviously wouldn't be interested in engaging in. Even I'm often questioned by muslim men when I intend to marry and such.
This is a miserable person.
Good that someone is finally paying attention this. I'm asexual and I've heard some of these phrases so many times.
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Yes, I tend to hear 9 and 18 a lot.
a lot of asexuals do marry, though. and some even have sex for the sake of their partner. so I don't see what the big deal there is.I'm not sure if this actually happens, but I know in many religious groups marriage is viewed as a pretty big thing so I'm sure there's huge amounts of pressure for marriage, which many asexuals obviously wouldn't be interested in engaging in. Even I'm often questioned by muslim men when I intend to marry and such.
I saw this on the list and sorry if this sounds slightly ignorant or offensive, but I am genuinely curious, do asexual people masturbate?
Wikipedia:
Some may masturbate as a solitary form of release, while others do not feel a need to do so.[5] The need or desire for masturbation is commonly referred to as a "sex drive" and is disassociated from sexual attraction and being sexual; asexuals who masturbate generally consider it to be a normal product of the human body and not a sign of latent sexuality, and may not even find it pleasurable.[6]
"I am not a liberator. Liberators do not exist. The people liberate themselves."
- Ernesto "Che Guevara, in Mexico, 1958
"When I give food to the poor, they call me a saint. When I ask why are they poor, they call me a Communist."
- Dom Hélder Pessoa Câmara
Again, it depends on the asexual. Some are completely repulsed by the idea of any romantic relationships whatsoever while others like me would probably consider marriage. I would never consider sex though, which is why I would only be comfortable being with another asexual. Obviously that won't be easy since there's so few around, but It seems I'm meeting more and more online.
As for the masturbation question, I personally very rarely masturbate so it does vary among asexuals. A sex drive can still be present even if you don't have any actual sexual attraction. Yes, I realize this is complicated to grasp. I even have a hard time explaining it in a way that makes sense. I guess you can also inquire from this that porn doesn't really serve much of a purpose for asexuals either.
If you want inclusion into the GLBT community you will have to fight. Such people have been historically dominated by Lesbians and gay men who have been less open minded than one would wish. In fact, the inclusion of the "T" in "GLBT" was accepted only after a movement by Transgendered people. Bisexuals have been through much of the same.
If you are looking for inclusion I would participate in the Queer community as there isn't "letter labeling" so sexually different people come as they are (is why I always refer to my community as queer, versus GLBT).
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I believe some asexuals have already marched in pride parades just to get it out there that we exist. It's a good first step anyway.If you want inclusion into the GLBT community you will have to fight. Such people have been historically dominated by Lesbians and gay men who have been less open minded than one would wish. In fact, the inclusion of the "T" in "GLBT" was accepted only after a movement by Transgendered people. Bisexuals have been through much of the same.
If you are looking for inclusion I would participate in the Queer community as there isn't "letter labeling" so sexually different people come as they are (is why I always refer to my community as queer, versus GLBT).
It is a step, every movement begins with a step yet Asexuals must organize with like minded Queers, in my opinion, if real change is to be brought about.Activism groups, in other words, is what is needed; groups like GLF, GAA, Act Up, Queer Nation, etc only for Asexuals instead of a one group oriented strategy. Militancy with vision, essentially.
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I think the primary issue for asexual folks at the moment is one of recognition and awareness. Sex and sexuality are frequently used to flog products, so a lot of people may find it difficult to accept the fact of asexuality when they are more or less constantly surrounded by the message that "sex sells".
Another cultural trope which I reckon contributes to the "invisibility" of asexuals (so to speak), is a strong cultural bias against being single and/or living alone.
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I'm a demisexual or gray-A asexual depending on the day and I am an ally to the LGBT movement and an active participant in LGBT activism(I'm a pan-romantic and bigendered as well). I agree with what others have said here in that we should make ourselves more visible and such.
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I see you haven't beat idiots in the head with that sack of door knobs. Get to work slack ass.
This is something that has always confused me about asexuality. Do asexual people have a sex drive? If the answer is no, why not? I really struggle to get my head around it. I once heard an asexual person in answer to the question "how do you know you're asexual if you haven't tried sex?" say "how do you know you're heterosexual/homosexual/bisexual if you've never tried anything else?" But to me that response make no sense. Indeed how does a heterosexual man, for example, know that he would not be sexually attracted to other men if he engaged in sex with a man? I don't believe our sexuality is something that is self-evident to ourselves. I think it's entirely possible for sexual preference to change over time, or rather that we can realise a sexual attraction towards people of any gender. Indeed I've come to a personal conclusion that potentially anyone can find anyone else sexually attractive regardless of what they consider their sexuality to be and regardless of that other person's gender or sex - that labels like heterosexual, homosexual and bisexual are inventions/myths, and that much like gender, sexuality is unique to each person.
However, I simply can't understand how some people might have no sexuality at all. The notion that some people may have a sex drive but feel no sexual attraction towards any person they've met begins to make some sense to me. But no sex drive at all? I feel there must be a biological or mental explanation for that, which very unfortunately causes us to stray into the territory of explaining this with the language of medical condition or disorder, as there being something wrong. I have no quarrel with any person who does not engage in sexuality activity, but at the same time I can't help but feel that such a thing has a negative (perhaps substantial) effect on that person's quality of life.
I remind myself that we live in a society that is aggressively anti-sex. Could this have something to do with it? Or perhaps I myself am massively mistaken in my view that sexual desire is one of the basic, fundamental and universal human desires. The whole thing hurts my head to be honest.
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Seriously? If anything society is very pro-sex, too pro-sex. I actually think people are judged too much based on how they look or how much sex appeal they have rather than more important things that should matter such as personality. Also, it's hard to do anything without hearing about sex and this even comes from young people who should be children rather than worrying about more grown up things. Anyway, I'm not trying to be a prude or anything, I just think there's many things very very wrong with our society.
I remind myself that we live in a society that is aggressively anti-sex. Could this have something to do with it? Or perhaps I myself am massively mistaken in my view that sexual desire is one of the basic, fundamental and universal human desires. The whole thing hurts my head to be honest.
I think asexuals do have a sex drive, just not the actual desire for a sexual relationship?
look. this is an honest question, if get restricted for it i guess i understand:
how do you know your asexuality is not a pathology? like, how do you know it isn't something wrong with you, chemically or psychologically that could be changed?
It's contradictory, but the values are not at all pro-sex.. If you're a woman, you're automatically a slut if you like sleeping around. It's pretty much a taboo too.
Branding based on sex is very useful though.
That's usually how it works.
That is pretty fucked up, yes. However, If people are sleeping around then obviously society is more pro-sex than you think? O.o So yea, maybe society as a whole isn't anti-sex even if some of the values are. You have to remember that things have changed a lot in recent decades, and maybe not necessarily all for the better.Originally Posted by Newleft
