Sperm-Doll Setsuna

My relationship with my ex? We had no kind of sexuality or intimacy really, and when we would do things she would make me feel miserable and hate every moment of it. We never had sex, we never got to really enjoy anything like that and she refused to be dominant. When I would bring these things up she would make me feel disgusting about it. "Oh god that's all you fucking think about, just fucking give up and go masturbate." She ignored my needs in the relationship, while I took care of all of hers. She was abusive about a lot of shit. She would hit me in my genitals to cause pain, and in general she would smack me if I didn't do things the way she wanted. She had the fucking hiccups once and I tried making her feel better about them and she punched me in the stomach and I almost puked on her because of it. I later found out her hiccups is not what she was angry about, but that I was still there and it was keeping her from talking to her ex in a sexual manner.

That's brutal as fuck awesome!!! not very odd haha, I've heard of that, but personally I just like being dominated by a women haha, bit personal haha, I like getting hit, wipped, bitten, I love being dominated

Those stories would probalby fuck with me haha, no pun intended, if that counts as a pun... You seem normal to me, but that's because I'm rather brutal, deranged and wicked myself. I personally like BDSM and I have few other things that may count as 'sexual perversion' I guess. School bullying is just fucking shitty comrade, that sucks :/ I've not heard of those types of things happening here, sadly here about rapes... also guys being disgusting

I see, sounds like many parallels to myself a bit also stories that give anxieties? Were you harmed in a terrible, terrible disgusting way that is extremely unspeakable?

I understand comrade, I can't witness other people's sexuality or see it on movies and in other places. I have had sex before, but I don't really see the appeal in it at all and it makes me feel a lot of insecurity and anxiety and in general disgust. I probably won't have sexual interactions for a long time, I don't even touch myself haha. Also as in getting tripped up I get confused reading sometimes and then I read it again and again until I understand it.

It was terrible and doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Sexuality causes me anxiety because of how my ex treated me and abused me about it, there is nothing wrong with sex and I'm getting over the anxiety of it, but I still get periods where if a movie has something sexual or rapy I have to turn it off and do something else. Same with some video games, and other media. I highly doubt you have a monstrous appearance haha. No one is ugly to me, sometimes Asperger's really sucks because when more eloquent people speak I get tripped up on what they're saying :/

A lot of things do that for me as well, and damn a lot of shit makes me think of my ex still. Like this film: https://www.facebook.com/ShelterTheMovie Its only the facebook of it but it was a terrible movie and sex scenes bother the fuck out of me and cause shitty anxiety, and she would make sure any movie we would watch had a sex scene so she could be a complete asshole to me. "Why are you so fucking depressive?" "OMG ITs just a fucking movie!" and stuff like that. I'm sure you're a fine person in real life

Why you be this?

Ahhh I completely understand, I think all diagnoses are bullshit and worthless tbh because we're all humans on the spectrum of humanity and we go from one extreme to the next it seems. Like with me, I go from bubbly happy and having fits of laughter, to being down right angry with life and wanting to die haha

It seems so hahaha XD frightened?