Communist Conspiracy - precious bodily fluids

[hazard]

I've heard a horde of anti communist conspiracies out there. And they are all really moronic. What makes it worse is that such conspiracies are taken as fact, expected to be at least partially believed and define the status quo in numerous locales throughout the globe.

What I want to know is if there are any PRO COMMUNIST conspiracies floating around. I dunno, like anything that may have floated out of China, Cuba or the USSR. I haven't really encountered any, so have been forced to develop my own. Just don't ask what they are.

[Ningram]

What are they?

[Dhul Fiqar]

Heh, North Korea has about a billion going around. The principle one being how the U.S. has been on the verge of invading them and using Nuclear Bombs against them since the fifties.

--- G.

[Felicia]

I haven't really heard any, but people should post them, they'd be fun to read, lol :biggrin:

[Pete]

remember: Dr. Strangelove, or how I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb.

[Iepilei]

N Korea had one that stated the US injected candy with poison and would give it to South Koreans to give to them. Whether it's true or not, I don't know.

[Ian]

My favourite is the long disregarded 'Rules for revolution' supposedly found in Germany in 1919 by Allied troops;
1. Corrupt the young; get them away from religion. Get them interested in sex. Make them superficial; destroy their ruggedness.

2. Get control of all means of publicity, thereby:

3. Get people's minds off their government by focusing their attention on athletics, sexy books, plays and immoral movies.

4. Divide the people into hostile groups by constantly harping on controversial matters of no importance.

5. Destroy the people's faith in their natural leaders by holding the latter up to contempt, ridicule and disgrace.

6. Always preach true democracy, but seize power as fast and as ruthlessly as possible.

7. By encouraging government extravagance, destroy its credit, produce years of inflation with rising prices and general discontent.

8. Incite unnecessary strikes in vital industries, encourage civil disorders and foster a lenient and soft attitude on the part of government toward such disorders.

9. Cause breakdown of the old moral values - honesty, sobriety, self-restraint, faith in the pledged word, ruggedness.

10. Cause the registration of all firearms on some pretext, with a view to confiscate them and leaving the populace helpless.

[hazard]

okay here's one:

in regards to the cold war, that it couldn't possibly be over or have ended in the way that has been told. there's more to this conspiracy, but proof of this central notion lay within weapons development.

in capitalism, the US has ten different companies all competing to develop the EXACT SAME THING. for instance, a new missile guidance system. so, instead of a thgousand scientists working, as a team, to develop this tek, you have TEN THOUSAND scientists all working against one another to achieve the same result.

in communism, there are no companies and thus no competition. one benefit would be TEN THOUSAND scientists working, as a team, to develop the missile guidance system in a fraction of the time. or, ten one thousand scientist teams all working on different projects simultaneusly.

basic math will show that based on this structure, the communists not only surpassed capitalist weapons development, but buried it. since the communist and capitalist nations are roughly of the same population base at the time of the cold war, the communists surpassed the capitalists at a scale at anywhere as high as ten to one. and even at a scale of 2 to 1, which is easily believable based on this hypothesis, one has to wonder what that means.

fastest cap fighter MACH 3 vs
fastest com fighter MACH 6

(times 2, right)

strongest cap nuke 10 megatonnes vs
strongest com nuke 20 megatonnes

proof of this lay in various weapons. the soviet mig29 is a faster, more maneuvarble fighter than the F18. the soviet t90 is a lighter, faster, smaller and stronger tank than the allies m1a1. and none of this is classified, either.

in other words, the capitalists could not have possibly won the cold war. communism simply managed their resources so much better than the ridiculous notion of competition to allow for any other result.

let me know if there are any questions before I move onto PART II of this theory. then again, part II may prove to be too much.

[CopperGoat]

whoa, talk about communist fire power. keep going hazard. this is a good feeling of power.

Muaahahahhahah!!!!

[hazard]

before I proceed, I want to see if any capitalist supporters have anything to say about this part.

beyond falling back to the premise that"BUT THE COMMUNISTS LOST THE COLD WAR", i don't see what they have

the idea of free competition is an idiotic one. how can it even compare to a unified format? and this doesn't just apply to weapons development, but to every aspect of a communist society. this theory uses weapons development because it deals with the cold war.

[Dhul Fiqar]

Ehm........... but they lost??? ;)

--- G.

[hazard]

interesting that you mention that.

what makes u say that the soviets lost?

chances are its becuase the free enterprize press reported that they lost. then they showed footage of a wall being dismantled and statues being broken up. this, mind u, is called proof. around the same time a friend gave me a gift that was supposed to be a piece of the berlin wall. did I believe THAT? of course not. although the box identiifed the piece of stone as being a piece of the wall, and the authenticy certificate verified the label, and it looked like what a piece of the wall might look like, nobody called me crazy when I said I didn't believe it actually was what I was told it was.

now, we have the event of the collapse of the soviet union. we all saw the images. now what, tho? I've seen dinosaurs eating people. I've seen spaceships blowing shit up. I saw roman legions marching along desolated battle fields. now, I don't think that dinosaurs have been cloned. thats crazy. I don't think any spaceships have blown up any spacestations. thats crazy. I don't think that somebody travelled back in time to film roman legions. thats crazy.

what we have, in the collpase of the soviet union, is hollywood in full force. make believe they won the cold war by presenting images to substantiate their belief. the only trick was changing the name from "USSR FALLS, starring Ford, Malkovich and Connerry" to "NEWS". all the events seen in the fake collapse could have very very easily been done with average effects. or, without any effects. a mock construction f all the areas, about ten to twenty thousand actors, and there it is. a giant lie. welcome to america.

now, before anybody thinks I've lost it, for those who think I haven't already, this is just a theory. I am using one basic element to support this theory. what I know. without actually being in the uSSR at the time, I only know what I have been told. and since I do not believe anything that these people tell me, I cannot believe what they say about the end of the cold war. I don't believe that jurassic park or star wars really happened, not because it has been labelled as fiction, but because of reason. similalry I don't believe that the USSR collapsed not because it has been labelled as non-fiction, but again because of common sense.

now, before I move into part two, it should be clear that we all have reason to question the validity of the assumption that the cold war ended with a victory for capitalism.

[praxis1966]

I've got a global communist conspiracy for you: Us!

P.S. Hazard, I don't know whether to laugh my ass off or recommend you to a good clinical psychiatrist.

P.P.S. Keep going... Being a paranoid/shizophrenic lunatic myself, I can relate to what you're saying.

(Edited by praxis1966 at 12:29 am on April 18, 2003)

[hazard]

speaking of paranoid/schizophrenic, isn't it interesting that modern mental illness is literally defined by the communist manifesto? I mean come on! what is up with that?

this isn't as much conspiracy as it is proven fact, but modern psyciatry is less medical than it is industrial. just look at all of the time and effort that goes into pushing the productive medications? they're literally being rammed down peoples throats. "illnesses" like depression and ADD, come on! these are only even considered illnesses because they interfer with production. a sad worker is a non productive worker, so, pump 'em full of sadness inhibitors and they work just as productively as the rest of 'em. and somebody obviously isn't a good worker if they don't devote every single solitary thought to their work, ala the wonders of ridilin. these aren't mental illnesses. these are industrial ailments.

ass for the idea of paranoia as an illness, paranoia is the basis for all highre thought. ALL of modern philosophy departs from the notion that ALL that can be doubted SHOULD be doubted. paranoia, plain and simple. making paranoia (under schizophrenia and Bi_polar(ha!)) an illness is in direct contradiction to the ideal of higher thinking. popular paranoia is phrased as a fear of being taken or mistreated by others. or something to that effect. in other words, one is paranoid if one believes in communism! for it is the communists who KNOW that capitalism is a system of exploitation. OTHERS ARE SUPPOSED TO MISTREAT YOU! its the only way the system can function. paranoid people are often intelligent, neurotic people who over analyze everything. this is excessively dangerous to a capitalist regime for it is the thinkers who can end it. thus, paranoia becomes an "illness" which is defined by those who follow who practice communism.

this, of all else, isn't really a conspiracy. both levels of psychiatry work to benefit their capitalist masters. it speaks wonders, in any case, about the failure of the capitalist system. the means of production is now forced to take medication only to remain productive. the best and brightest branded as if they were living in nazi germany. all to protect the ability of the capitalists to force others to work solely for their benefit.

(Edited by hazard at 3:49 pm on April 18, 2003)

[Urban Rubble]

Maybe I missed something, are you actually trying to claim that the Soviet Union never collapsed ? Are you being serious ? Also, just because math shows us that the communists SHOULD have beaten the U$, it doesn't mean they did.

[hazard]

ur:

what I'm saying is that there are many reasons to question the events of the "collapse" of the USSR. primarily, the source and the so called factors leading to it.

I am stopping short of saying that THEY DID NOT collapse. this is only because it would drag me from the realm of madness into the domain of upper lunacy, also known as the howling insanity.

two things.

the USSR could not and should not have lost the cold war, let alone "collapse" like it did.

the basis for believing the idea that the USSR collapsed is easily countered with the most basic philsophical principle. that is to doubt all that can be doubted. between the propaganda of the media, corruption of the capitalists and filth of hollywood there is nothing here that CANNOT be doubted.

wag the dog:

"what? the war's not over. "

"yes it is. the TV just said it was."


on another note, if anyone has ever rented that DVD check out the info section. it walks through every decade of the media and the movie industry's portrayal of it starting from the twenties. good stuff.

[redstar2000]

How did this Chit-Chat thread get into Theory?

Conspiracy?

:cool:

[hazard]

if you notice, redstar, none of these ideas are conspiracies. instead, they are "conspiracies". the difference is far from negligible.

also, they are theories at the very least. their status as conspiratorial is irrelevant to their proper theoretical placement here.