Revleft writes a story

[Entrails Konfetti]

It was a dark and stormy night...

I don't know where to take it from there.

[Luís Henrique]

Originally posted by EL [email protected] 03, 2007 03:26 am
It was a dark and stormy night...

I don't know where to take it from there.
... all was silent, except for the wind and the rain, until...

[RedAnarchist]

Originally posted by Luís Henrique+June 03, 2007 10:40 pm--> (Luís Henrique @ June 03, 2007 10:40 pm)
EL [email protected] 03, 2007 03:26 am
It was a dark and stormy night...

I don't know where to take it from there.
... all was silent, except for the wind and the rain, until... [/b]
Something which no human eyes had ever met and no mortal tongue had spoke of came into sight

[which doctor]

Originally posted by Makhno+June 03, 2007 04:50 pm--> (Makhno @ June 03, 2007 04:50 pm)
Originally posted by Luís [email protected] 03, 2007 10:40 pm

EL [email protected] 03, 2007 03:26 am
It was a dark and stormy night...

I don't know where to take it from there.
... all was silent, except for the wind and the rain, until...
Something which no human eyes had ever met and no mortal tongue had spoke of came into sight [/b]
It spoke a language I could not understand, yet it elicited so many emotion. I felt like it was speaking to my heart. I felt like...

[Entrails Konfetti]

Originally posted by FoB+June 04, 2007 02:17 pm--> (FoB @ June 04, 2007 02:17 pm)
Originally posted by [email protected] 03, 2007 04:50 pm

Originally posted by Luís [email protected] 03, 2007 10:40 pm

EL [email protected] 03, 2007 03:26 am
It was a dark and stormy night...

I don't know where to take it from there.
... all was silent, except for the wind and the rain, until...
Something which no human eyes had ever met and no mortal tongue had spoke of came into sight
It spoke a language I could not understand, yet it elicited so many emotion. I felt like it was speaking to my heart. I felt like... [/b]
A weasel in a fat mans dinner jacket, because...

[Mujer Libre]

I was composed on the outside, but inside I was squirming and...

[Rage Against Right]

I was composed on the outside, but inside I was squirming and...

...the sudden thought of what i had just done hit me, a rye smile appeared over my face...

[Kurt Crover]

Originally posted by Rage Against [email protected] 05, 2007 09:32 am

I was composed on the outside, but inside I was squirming and...

...the sudden thought of what i had just done hit me, a rye smile appeared over my face...
as I walked forward, I heard a voice spoke and said...

[RedAnarchist]

in a long dead language that existed only in museums...

[Pirate Utopian]

"Hey my nizzles!, this is the topdizzle in the hizzle, fo' shizzle!"

[RedAnarchist]

I opened my eyes wide enough to see the

[Pawn Power]

...absurdly...

[Angry Young Man]

Ingenuitous Clairvoyant Anarchist Tension, with more hair than...

[RedAnarchist]

a buffalo, and he began

[Dr Mindbender]

Originally posted by [email protected] 06, 2007 08:31 pm
a buffalo, and he began
licking my face repeatedly, while interfering with his udders...

[Angry Young Man]

Which he realised he didn't have because he wasn't a cow, you fucking idiot.

After the abuse I gave to Ulster Socialist, I went left down...

[Dr Mindbender]

Originally posted by Romantic [email protected] 07, 2007 08:47 pm
Which he realised he didn't have because he wasn't a cow, you fucking idiot.

After the abuse I gave to Ulster Socialist, I went left down...
..i put my right arm out, put my left leg in, and spun around

thats what its all about!...

[OneBrickOneVoice]

after finishing hokey pockeying, TAT became a Leninist

[which doctor]

and after realizing the futility of his own movement, committed suicide.

[OneBrickOneVoice]

but was revived when he realized that Lenin really is god and chose him as his lord and savior

[Honggweilo]

Lenin spoke to TAT and plead; "Thy shall cleanse the TaliRAAN infidels from these lands, for the salvation of scientific socialism!". TAT accepted his masters request and went on his devine quest to rid the evil from the land, a evil dreaded so long by his leninist comrades...

[Qwerty Dvorak]

... but TAT had a plan.

[luxemburg89]

... but TAT had a plan.

Or rather did have, He had lost it some time back, when wrestling the crocodile by the oasis. Then it struck him, what am i doing in the desert!? He had no memory of arriving in the desert, and he noticed his trousers had started to...

[RedAnarchist]

Become red with blood as

[OneBrickOneVoice]

...taliRAAN crabs bit him all over

[Honggweilo]

But then suddenly out of nowhere fierce ferocious emo punkrock boys started kissing each other and that gave TAT such an erection that he could club the taliRAAN crabs to death with his humongous boner....

[luxemburg89]

until one clamped it in its pincer...

[OneBrickOneVoice]

but then Pol Pot came swooping down from the heavans and beat back the taliRAAN crabs saving TAT. He told TAT that Lenin-God had sent him to be his faithful sidekick

[RedAnarchist]

TAT and Pol Pot then tried to work out a way to escape the desert. They eventually decided to

[Honggweilo]

Our protagonist hero in full glory

http://img507.imageshack.us/img507/33/tatpoltaliraancrabsce4.jpg

[luxemburg89]

they eventually decided to part ways after pol pot started shooting anyone with glasses and appeared like a real twat. Pol Pot said he only did it for attention but TAT was unimpressed. Using his hips he...

[Comrade J]

...impressed a local cab driver, who then offered to run him into town.

Meanwhile, TAT was left alone in the desert, admiring his receding boner and humming the Soviet National Anthem. Much to his surprise, an Apache attack helicopter arrived on the scene, and out stepped none other than...

[Honggweilo]

Tragic Clown! who pointed out that TAT was still an anarcho-chauvinist at heart and by displaying his male genitals in full glory he was making an unconcience mysogenic statement that way... She smirked at his futile attempt to portray himself as a leninst but complimented him on his enormous ammount of seducing bodyhair. After that TC....

[Comrade J]

turned to TAT, and began to speak.

"lol
you're an idiot
TAT, out here
in the desert
alone.
lol."
said TC

"Why the hell are you speaking like that?" questioned TAT, "I thought that was just something you did in Live Chat?"

"lol
no
I just
speak like
this
lol"
said TC, much to the amazement of both TAT and a passing cow.

After their brief confrontation, TC returned to her Apache attack helicopter, and took off into the sunset, whilst TAT continued his march towards...

[luxemburg89]

Coventry, he then realised that there are no deserts near Coventry and thought he may be lost. He then grabbed the nearest pig...

[Honggweilo]

which he tried to flay to prepare for consumption.. but he soon realized their arent any pigs in the desert..i must be halucinating; TAT thought. Then out of nowhere God-Lenin appeared out of the sky and said; "My son, you've done well in defeating those TaliRAAN minions but your quest is long from over, the real destructive power of the TaliRAAN lies in the power of one so dreaded, so horrifing that he will post his picture on every page in the "Faces to Names" tread... the evil overload Chimx and his dreaded sidekick Nachie". TAT flinched for a second, and then replied to his master.....

[Comrade J]

"My Lord, they say the one they call Chimx... cannot be defeated"
"SILENCE, MINION!" roared Lenin, "thou art my liege and I command thee, destroy the one they call Chimx! For he holds the ultimate power of the TaliRAAN... without him, they cannot function."
TAT gulped uneasily, as Lenin's red eyes glared at him.
"And wh-where... where do I find him?"
"Look into your heart TAT, and all shall be clear" boomed the reply.
As Lenin's image faded from the barely lit sky over the cooling desert, TAT sat and thought hard - just where could Chimx be?
Then as he thought long and hard, it suddenly dawned on him, there could only be one place where such a being would reside. TAT stood and set off on his journey to...

[luxemburg89]

Coventry again. Then he realised he suffered from deja vu and looked for a rabbit...

[RedAnarchist]

which he did eventually find, but to his horror

[Honggweilo]

it sat beside a lonely cactus which was shapped like a giant swastika. He asked the rabbit; Hullo there furry lad, could you tell me where to find the road to Coventry? Well certainly my well hung emotionally unstable friend; the rabbit replied. Just follow the Shining Path a few kilometers to your right. TAT thanked the rabbit and set of to find the Path. When he finally arived he did not find a road but Chairman Gonzalo and a squadron of Shining Path guerilla's....

[luxemburg89]

After a rediculously long conversation about the linguistic skills of a rabbit in the desert he set off on his way again. He needed to find Coventry, the Mecca of the Midlands, the...

[RedAnarchist]

road unfortuianetly ended at Birmingham, the shithole of the Midlands., so

[Honggweilo]

what went wrong? He followed the will of his heart when headed for Coventry. Chairman Gonzalo told him that he just needed to follow the bright image of Mao Zedong in the Sun and that eventually he would arive in Coventry. But alas, when he encountered the first lush green fields of Birmingham he headed for the central square.

[luxemburg89]

There he met a man who spoke fluent greek, and this man said in his native language:

[Honggweilo]

"I like to besiege universities to fight for my educational rights! while i'm at it i torch up pigs with homemade flametrowers made in the chemistry lab"

[RedAnarchist]

and he vanished,, leaving only a burnt mark on the ground. TAT then decided

[Comrade J]

TAT ignored the stupid man, and decided to find somewhere to stay for the night.

He decided to check into a Travelodge.

After taking an overpriced taxi through the grey and boring streets of Birmingham, he arrived at the Travelodge, and strolled inside, in his torn, tangled mud-ridden clothes.

"Haha, TAT" came a voice from somewhere to his left, "you look ridiculous!"

TAT looked to see who had spoken to him. To his surprise, the receptionist was none other than...

[luxemburg89]

The rabbit. Having been ordered by Gods, molested by crabs, directed by rabbits and lied to by greek impersonators TAT knew his only hope was at sainsbury's where he would buy...

[RedAnarchist]

a can of diet coke, some whipped cream and half a ton of baked beans, because

[Honggweilo]

He was really starving. He also bought at ton of vasaline, because he really needed to tame down his huge johnson, which he had to carry with him in full errection all the way to birmingham. So when TAT rented a lodge in sainsbury, he laid down on the bed and jerked off to images of..

[RedAnarchist]

polish punk boys and

[luxemburg89]

naked, sweaty, pulsating, pussing, throbbing, expanding...

[RedAnarchist]

TragicClown-shaped inflatable dolls

[luxemburg89]

TAT was extremely impressed with the range of products sainsbury's now sells. But that was not what he came for. Toilet Duck. He needed it and fast, because...

[RedAnarchist]

shit was coming out of TC's mouth as usual and

[luxemburg89]

he saw, on the wall opposite, the fourth verse of the lebanese national anthem, it read:

[RedAnarchist]

Which doesnt exist, so

[Honggweilo]

he was halucinating again...

[Comrade J]

"Our Elders and our children, they await our Country's call,

And on the Day of Crisis they are as Lions of the Jungle.

The heart of our East is ever Lebanon,

May God preserve her until end of time.

All of us! For our Country, for our Flag and Glory!"

[RedAnarchist]

TAT watched out for any Hamas supporters and

[Comrade J]

had a quick wank

[luxemburg89]

Extremely satisfied he continued on his journey where he saw the most disgusting, foul, green, girating, hovering...

[Honggweilo]

SWP members with Hamas flags screaming "Allah Akbar". He then

[RedAnarchist]

Originally posted by [email protected] 09, 2007 11:48 pm
Extremely satisfied he continued on his journey where he saw the most disgusting, foul, green, girating, hovering...
Malte! He looked at Malte and

[Honggweilo]

He then looked at Malte who was begging a rabi to flog him for being german. The rabi responded.

[luxemburg89]

all you need if love, love, and love is all you need. Unfortunately 'love', the little french boy who he suddenly remembered guided him to the desert in the first place was eaten by the crocodile. He sighed, picked up the nearest roll of toilet paper (which was in a public toilet some 2 miles away) he...

[RedAnarchist]

Whilst the rabbi did this, TAT wanked at them and asked to be flogged as well. The rabbi then

[luxemburg89]

pulled out his own disgusting, foul, green, girating, hovering...

[RedAnarchist]

mini-rabbi, which jumped up TAT's arse like the hamster in South Park and

[Honggweilo]

*obsolete*

[luxemburg89]

performed the second act of Hamlet all by himself, it went something like this:

[RedAnarchist]

SCENE II. A hall in the castle.

Enter HAMLET and Players
HAMLET
Speak the speech, I pray you, as I pronounced it to
you, trippingly on the tongue: but if you mouth it,
as many of your players do, I had as lief the
town-crier spoke my lines. Nor do not saw the air
too much with your hand, thus, but use all gently;
for in the very torrent, tempest, and, as I may say,
the whirlwind of passion, you must acquire and beget
a temperance that may give it smoothness. O, it
offends me to the soul to hear a robustious
periwig-pated fellow tear a passion to tatters, to
very rags, to split the ears of the groundlings, who
for the most part are capable of nothing but
inexplicable dumbshows and noise: I would have such
a fellow whipped for o'erdoing Termagant; it
out-herods Herod: pray you, avoid it.

First Player
I warrant your honour.

HAMLET
Be not too tame neither, but let your own discretion
be your tutor: suit the action to the word, the
word to the action; with this special o'erstep not
the modesty of nature: for any thing so overdone is
from the purpose of playing, whose end, both at the
first and now, was and is, to hold, as 'twere, the
mirror up to nature; to show virtue her own feature,
scorn her own image, and the very age and body of
the time his form and pressure. Now this overdone,
or come tardy off, though it make the unskilful
laugh, cannot but make the judicious grieve; the
censure of the which one must in your allowance
o'erweigh a whole theatre of others. O, there be
players that I have seen play, and heard others
praise, and that highly, not to speak it profanely,
that, neither having the accent of Christians nor
the gait of Christian, pagan, nor man, have so
strutted and bellowed that I have thought some of
nature's journeymen had made men and not made them
well, they imitated humanity so abominably.

First Player
I hope we have reformed that indifferently with us,
sir.

HAMLET
O, reform it altogether. And let those that play
your clowns speak no more than is set down for them;
for there be of them that will themselves laugh, to
set on some quantity of barren spectators to laugh
too; though, in the mean time, some necessary
question of the play be then to be considered:
that's villanous, and shows a most pitiful ambition
in the fool that uses it. Go, make you ready.

Exeunt Players

Enter POLONIUS, ROSENCRANTZ, and GUILDENSTERN

How now, my lord! I will the king hear this piece of work?

LORD POLONIUS
And the queen too, and that presently.

HAMLET
Bid the players make haste.

Exit POLONIUS

Will you two help to hasten them?

ROSENCRANTZ GUILDENSTERN
We will, my lord.

Exeunt ROSENCRANTZ and GUILDENSTERN

HAMLET
What ho! Horatio!

Enter HORATIO

HORATIO
Here, sweet lord, at your service.

HAMLET
Horatio, thou art e'en as just a man
As e'er my conversation coped withal.

HORATIO
O, my dear lord,--

HAMLET
Nay, do not think I flatter;
For what advancement may I hope from thee
That no revenue hast but thy good spirits,
To feed and clothe thee? Why should the poor be flatter'd?
No, let the candied tongue lick absurd pomp,
And crook the pregnant hinges of the knee
Where thrift may follow fawning. Dost thou hear?
Since my dear soul was mistress of her choice
And could of men distinguish, her election
Hath seal'd thee for herself; for thou hast been
As one, in suffering all, that suffers nothing,
A man that fortune's buffets and rewards
Hast ta'en with equal thanks: and blest are those
Whose blood and judgment are so well commingled,
That they are not a pipe for fortune's finger
To sound what stop she please. Give me that man
That is not passion's slave, and I will wear him
In my heart's core, ay, in my heart of heart,
As I do thee.--Something too much of this.--
There is a play to-night before the king;
One scene of it comes near the circumstance
Which I have told thee of my father's death:
I prithee, when thou seest that act afoot,
Even with the very comment of thy soul
Observe mine uncle: if his occulted guilt
Do not itself unkennel in one speech,
It is a damned ghost that we have seen,
And my imaginations are as foul
As Vulcan's stithy. Give him heedful note;
For I mine eyes will rivet to his face,
And after we will both our judgments join
In censure of his seeming.

HORATIO
Well, my lord:
If he steal aught the whilst this play is playing,
And 'scape detecting, I will pay the theft.

HAMLET
They are coming to the play; I must be idle:
Get you a place.


and continued into the night

[Honggweilo]

TAT, clearly satisfied by having a gerbil up his bottom, stated he still had a quest to forfill and that shakespear could wait.

[RedAnarchist]

So he vomited up the hamster bulimic style and continued

[luxemburg89]

TAT had walked off halfway through and in his anger the mini-rabbi pulled out a shotgun and went looking for TAT. Our hero then met Ash, Misty and Brock from the Pokémon series...

[RedAnarchist]

And has a threesome with Ash and Brock whilst getting Misty to tape the whole orgy and then

[luxemburg89]

Pikachu had an orgasm which sounded like:

[RedAnarchist]

nothing, because he was actually only a dream which TAT had, and TAT woke up and

[luxemburg89]

realised he had fallen asleep during Hamlet and needed a quick escape. Nearby he saw some condoms and a packet of cigarettes. As these were of no use to him now he looked around and saw some rope...

[RedAnarchist]

and used it to catch Comrade J, who was taken by surprise

[luxemburg89]

and, nearing his impending doom, said 'tell Lux, I love him...'

[RedAnarchist]

But TAT actually heard "Tell Makhno I love him..." so

[Honggweilo]

Originally posted by [email protected] 09, 2007 11:02 pm
TAT had walked off halfway through and in his anger the mini-rabbi pulled out a shotgun and went looking for TAT. Our hero then met Ash, Misty and Brock from the Pokémon series...
http://www.freepornhentai.com/pokemon/pokemonhentai/pokemonsex13.jpg
:lol:

[luxemburg89]

shot Makhno in the face with a shotgun, this, however, solved nothing and he had to get help from the best source possible. This was the buddhist monk...

[RedAnarchist]

known only as Dr Rosenpenis

[luxemburg89]

it was here the holy words were spoken. The words comprised of this weeks edition of OK! magazine, which was all about how Britney has totally been a ***** about Christina siply because she like all friendly with Paris, who is being SUCH a slut for not talking to Madonna. TAT understood his mission...

[Honggweilo]

The missing link in getting to Chimx lay hidden with Maddona and Britney. Dr. Rosenpenis whispered acient holy spells to enchant him with anti STD protection. Rosenpenis added that clues on where to find Britney and Madonna lied with a hooker well known to Rosenpenis, a hooker called Simone... She lived in São Paolo, Brasil, so TAT...

[RedAnarchist]

jumped onto luxemburg89 and they flew across the atlantic to Brazil, where

[luxemburg89]

Lux pointed out that they had in fact landed on the isle of wight, as they had run out of Red Bull...

[RedAnarchist]

So TAT slapped lux with the remnants of his stiff cock and grabbed hold of ddxt301 and stocked up with Red Bull and flew off once more to Brazil

[luxemburg89]

they woke up the next morning with a massive headache. The last thing they remembered saying was "who put this massive statue of christ here!?" before passing out...

[RedAnarchist]

When they awoke, they were greeted by a male prostitute called wtfm8lol who

[Honggweilo]

asked if they wanted there cocks sucked for 2 Reál so he could buy some glue to sniff

[Comrade J]

"No, I'm alright thanks", replied TAT.
"My mother's cheaper, but she isn't here right now. You can wait"
"Erm... no thanks" said TAT.
He walked down the hill and saw an animal he had never seen before. It was a...

[luxemburg89]

Stalinist and it was horrible...

[RedAnarchist]

creature known only as Voz_de_la_Gente_Trabajadora, which

[Honggweilo]

was a stalinocarnivore, and ate ddxt301

[RedAnarchist]

And then tried to bite TAT's head off, but instead TAT shoved his cock inside its mouth so

[luxemburg89]

TAT paused for a second. What I really need now is a good, long, hard, wet...

[RedAnarchist]

Originally posted by [email protected] 10, 2007 12:36 am
TAT paused for a second. What I really need now is a good, long, hard, wet...
BOZG to suck me off so

[luxemburg89]

why don't I go to France? No, he though, I must contain my urges. He stepped into the nearest taxi, removed his trousers and asked for seven...

[RedAnarchist]

young polish punk boys to be delivered to his hotel room

[luxemburg89]

he found it increasingly harder to sleep without their melodic voices lulling him to the land of dreams and Pokémon porn - Pornémon if you will - and without their large, throbbing...

[RedAnarchist]

anal probes he couldn't renew his amazing ability to

[luxemburg89]

recite hungarian poetry, in hungarian, for example:

[RedAnarchist]

Félálomban...
Szép kedvesem
Lágy kebele...
Szived buját...
Mind érezem...

Kicsiny madár,
Dalolj nekem...
Tündéri dal,
Hü szerelem !

Ezüst... arany...
Nem kell, nem kell,
Oly bús vagyok:
Vigyétek el !...

Mily illat ez,
Mily sok virág !
Egy végtelen
Kert a világ...

Bús puszta lesz
Mindjárt az ég,
Hullatja le
Minden diszét,

A csillagok
Lehullanak,
Fejem körül
Koszorunak !...

Hah, lánc csörög !
Hát volna még ?
Hisz ami volt
Mind eltörék...

Csörög... de nem
A kezeken...
Földön csörög,
Leestiben.

Ott voltam én
A nagy csatán,
A zászlót én
Lobogtatám.

Hoztam haza
Vérzö sebet...
Elmúlt a harc,
Beforrt a seb.

Aludj, aludj,
Szép kedvesem...
Oh szabadság !
Oh szerelem !

Pest, 1848. (Január)

[luxemburg89]

But alas this could quench his thirst for a picture of margerat thatcher performing an act of sex upon a monkey, whilst wearing a ballet costume and reciting the alphabet, with an eye patch and a nipple piercing. just like this:

[RedAnarchist]

http://www.forum.md/Data/Journals/censored.gif

[luxemburg89]

he cleared his eyes and saw that the 'censor' had gone and clear in front of his eyes was the desired image:

[RedAnarchist]

http://www.acc.umu.se/~zqad/cats/1166518423-PXQMK3AWZUFPVQIVPG7HORSMICMGISVZ.jpg

[luxemburg89]

It was not the desired image but it would suffice. Then Lenin appeared to him and he asked 'Lenin, what are your beliefs on late abortion?'...

[RedAnarchist]

Well, I decided by playing some basketball every morning. If I miss, the mother gets purged. If I score, the baby is born and then gets purged. Lenin then proceded to do this

http://www.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,,5310597,00.jpg

[luxemburg89]

all morning but soon got tired and decided that TAT must go and destroy Dave Cameron's children using only tarmac, a leather belt and a mushroom...

[RedAnarchist]

Unfortunately, the "mushroom" was radioactive -

http://www.breadonthewaters.com/add/0888_nuclear_explosion_large_clipart.jpg

[luxemburg89]

and blew up Coventry, but luckily TAT's mission was no longer in Coventry. He had to go to the USA to meet the local Pros...

[RedAnarchist]

As TAT went to see the prosecutioner, a kitten started shooting at him from a window

http://home.earthlink.net/~whynowblog/CatSniper.jpg

[luxemburg89]

he jumped to one side, adjusted his thong and said in a very deep, booming voice...

[RedAnarchist]

http://artlung.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2006/10/kitties_we_cant_stop_here_this_is_bat_country.jpg

[luxemburg89]

The local onlookers were horrified. A grown man was letting cats drive him around. The horror, the terror, the tears in children's eyes when the cats were taken away for not having an up-to-date tax disk. TAT laughed and proclaimed:

'I am the king of...'

[RedAnarchist]

http://dirtydogstink.com/blog/content/images/King_of_the_Hill_alley.jpg

[luxemburg89]

...being a fat lazy shit american sitcom, and I'm proud of it!' However this did not stand up in court as Pikachu was willing to testify against TAT in the charge of having sex with a minor Pokémon trainer whilst, and the crocodile also turned out for the defence. Then, suddenly, in came the gang currently on Live Chat...

[RedAnarchist]

http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f216/comrade-j/livechat.jpg

[luxemburg89]

The court ruled that a restriction will be placed on the butt-plugs, as they were causing quite a stir and the judges wife was enjoying herself too much. TAT, angered, demanded to know what the judges wife was doing in his court hearing. The judge replied 'buggering herself with a butt-plug, what else?'
To which our hero replied...

[RedAnarchist]

http://blogs.business2.com/photos/uncategorized/lgfp1552.jpg

[luxemburg89]

before realising his welsh accent needed some work on and pleading guilty of charges of abuse of air time and comedic resposibility. The judge, being American, did not understand and removed his clothes whilst declaring he was, indeed, Henry VII...

[RedAnarchist]

http://www.manishin.com/blog/images/mad-cow-disease_350.jpg

[luxemburg89]

TAT then drew a big picture. It was stalin riding a penny farthing, wearing a trillby and singing house of the rising sun...

[OneBrickOneVoice]

Stalin then jumped out of the picture and told TAT to quit STALIN' and do what Lenin-God hath commanded, and then disapeared.

[RedAnarchist]

TAT then ran out of the building and

[OneBrickOneVoice]

bumped into Thomas Jefferson and his slaves

[RedAnarchist]

TAT then killed Jefferson and freed the slaves, then

[Entrails Konfetti]

Originally posted by [email protected] 10, 2007 02:36 am
TAT then killed Jefferson and freed the slaves, then
Cloned his penis instantly in a petry-dish with his portable cloning machine, stuck a rifle-butt on it, and gave it to John Brown for Harpers Raid.

John Brown explained...

[RedAnarchist]

John Brown (May 9, 1800 – December 2, 1859) was the first white American abolitionist to advocate and practice insurrection as a means to the abolition of slavery. President Abraham Lincoln said he was a "misguided fanatic" and Brown has been called "the most controversial of all 19th-century Americans."[1] His attempt in 1859 to start a liberation movement among enslaved blacks in Harpers Ferry, Virginia, electrified the nation, even though not a single slave answered his call. He was tried for treason against the state of Virginia and hanged, but his behavior at the trial seemed heroic to millions of Americans. Southerners alleged that his rebellion was the tip of an abolitionist iceberg and represented the wishes of the Republican Party, but those charges were vehemently denied by the Republicans. Historians agree that the Harpers Ferry raid in 1859 escalated tensions that a year later led to secession and the American Civil War.


Whilst TAT was listening to that, he

[Pirate Utopian]

looked up a tree and saw his archnemesis.....

[Honggweilo]

and faithfull sidekick of Chimx.. Nachie! He was cutting of the brances of the tree. He faced TAT with a terrfying grin claiming that he was liberating it from enviormental polution by putting it out of its missery. Then TAT look down and saw a dozen of workers hanging on gallows fixed to the tree... Nachie continued, while he observed TAT's confusion and discust for what he was seeing, that he hung those workers to save them from the perils of wage labour and consumerist culture and that they could only find true freedom in death. "Besides", Nachie added, "There are now save from the false illusion of workers emancipation in life from you meddeling leninists! Muhahahahaha" TAT, so engraged by the situation, clenched his fists. His hair rose and turned blond and he became Super Saiyan 4.. Then TAT

[RedAnarchist]

knocked Nachie to the ground adn was about to crush him, when all of a sudden, who would approach but

[Honggweilo]

Mujer Libre who..

[RedAnarchist]

who with her amazing powers of moderatorship, knocked TAT away, and then her friends all appeared to kick the shit out of him

http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e375/waffleprincess/Music/metalocalypse2.jpg

ML and her friends then left, leaving TAT to

[cubist]

Tend to his wounds. Howvere The Police were buying Donuts from teh Fatty piggy Donut shop on the corner they ran to help a man in need Saw he was a leftist and beat him instead cuffed him to the railings and walked off leaving TAT to Sit and ponder....

[RedAnarchist]

How he could find Nachie and get revenge?

[Pirate Utopian]

TAT then had a genius plan, namely......

[RedAnarchist]

"The Greatest Plan Ever, And TAT Says So So It Is, So Nyah", which was

[cubist]

To go and see redstar2000 in hospital and seek advice which was...

[RedAnarchist]

to use the forks

http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/PF_NEW%5C08_29_2005/PF_1106488~Forks-Posters.jpg

[luxemburg89]

Having gained no pleasure whatsoever from these, and alot of cuts in strange places, he decided to take another route. He would go to Anne Summer's a buy a huge...

[RedAnarchist]

rubber dildo

http://www.cartoonstock.com/newscartoons/cartoonists/nta/lowres/ntan2l.jpg

[Honggweilo]

Which he was going to use as weapon of choise in a chiviral duel between him and Nachie.. However in preperation of this grand event..

[Pirate Utopian]

He was kidnapped by...........

[luxemburg89]

Michael Jackson, who mistook him for a 3-year old boy. Michael Jackon pulled out his own rubber, cylindrical...

[OneBrickOneVoice]

anarcho-kitty

[Pirate Utopian]

Wich he shoved up TAT's........

[Comrade J]

ass and said "lick this," pullling out his nob.

You can't make me, boomed TAT, as he fled into the distance, with Michael Jackson's huge boner chasing him through the city of New York, where he has suddenly arrived.

As he turned around a corner, he came across the Twin Towers.

"Shit," he groaned to himself, "I must have gone through a time portal"

"I can help you with that," croaked a voice to his left.

TAT turned. It was none other than Revleft's greatest member,...

[Rawthentic]

...Voz de la Gente Trabajadora who shoved a frame of Lenin down TAT's throat

[Pirate Utopian]

TAT asked him after swallowing what year it was.

[Rawthentic]

It was 1917 he had found out, and the Russian working class had taken power.

TAT was astonished to see what real socialism was like, and completely shed himself of any utopianism that he had. He then offered to join the Bolshevik Party, but was rejected on the grounds that he had illegally crossed a time portal, and was called an "illegal alien."

[Pirate Utopian]

Soon he met a timetravelling crew of........

[RedAnarchist]

Anarchists from the 340th Century

[Rawthentic]

Whom attempted to sabotage the soviets, make molotov cocktails and then spraypaint the factories, but remembered thats spray paint did not exist in their time so they just decided to piss on them.

TAT was pulled from both sides, the Bolsheviks and the Anarchists, who then ripped his arms apart...

[RedAnarchist]

leaving him with two short bloody stubs where his arms were and

[luxemburg89]

the world's biggest collection of Cliff Richard CDs which he subsequantly used to beat a gigantic creature to death. It was green, with a giraffe's neck, a crocodile's tale, a large horn, horses legs, ducks feet and Bill Gates' head, it looked like this:

[Comrade J]

http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f216/comrade-j/whatthefuck.jpg

After defeating the evil creature, TAT noticed a swirling vortex of mist in the corner.

"Aha!" he called, though nobody heard, "that must be a time portal."

And sure enough, it was. Moments later, TAT was back in modern day America, at the bottom of a steep hill. At the bottom, a sign tapped gently in the wind against a neighbouring tree.
It read:

THIS IS THE LAIR OF CHIMX. ABANDON ALL HOPE, ALL YE WHO ENTER. (Except for Pizza Delivery)

TAT smirked. So now he would finally fulfill the wishes of LeninGod, and battle the evil tyrant Chimx.

And he was not alone in his quest, for walking up the hill beside him was a PERSON (no, not a rabbit lux) who he had never seen before, but had spoken to online. It was...

[luxemburg89]

Du_Che and he had brought Committee 300 with him to do battle. TAT was faced with his greatest challenge yet. How on earth do I prevent the advocation of bird walks and spring forest holidays, he thought, whilst fighting the evil tyrant? There was only one option, he would have to call on Jazzratt...

[Comrade J]

Reaching for his phone, he dialled Jazzratt's number, which was simply a single number, known only to the Illuminati, The Christian Rock Association, and the Mafia.

The phone began to ring, and TAT sweated with nervousness. Jazzratt would not tolerate fools.

"What?" came an angry voice.
"Er, Jazz, it's me, TAT."
"What the fuck you want?"
"Well..." stuttered TAT, "we have a situation."

There was a pause.

"What situation?"
"It's a Code Red Jazzratt... sir..."
"Right, I'll be there straight away with the tanks," said Jazzratt, "where are you?"

TAT gave him the address and waited. Just an hour later, a huge army of tanks swarmed over the horizon, heading in his direction, with Jazzratt sitting on the leading tank.

"Right TAT," said Jazzratt, stepping from his tank, "here's the plan. Take four yoghurt pots, some sticky back plastic, a llama and a copy of Jurassic Park III, and...

[luxemburg89]

...Just Dance the night away!!"
"why are you singing Jazz?"
"we lull the enemies into a false sense of security that way - Nero was going to try it in Ancient Rome'
'But we're not in ancient Rome...'
'Shut up TAT.' Jazzratt snapped.

Jazzratt paused, then he spoke again.

'Anyway I want you to dance into the lair, it'll become apparent when you get in. There you will meet Makhno, Lux, Comrade_J and ddxt, they will aid you in your quest'
'what about Committee 300 Jazzratt?'
'Leave them to me you ****ing fuckwit' said Jazzratt with a gentle smile, and then he grabbed the large protruding instrument with which he intended to fire on them and...

[Comrade J]

pointed it at the sky. It was a lightning conductor.

Jazzratt chuckled at his incredible plan. He would wait for lightning to strike the rod, then put it down the barrel of a tank gun. Upon firing, the electrically charged rod would slam through Chimx's lair, and not only pierce anyone who stood in it's way, but send a charge through all of Chimx's defense system, allowing TAT to sneak in undiscovered.

Coincidently, a storm began to brew, and within minutes Jazzratt had put his plan into action, and Chimx's compound became a vast and eerie plain of darkness.

Meanwhile, TAT was dancing up the hill, and into a secret tunnel, which had been hidden behind a suspiciously out-of-place shrub.

"Ah TAT, you made it," whispered Makhno and ddxt simultaneously.
TAT nodded, then glanced to the back of the cave in which he had found himself. There, sat the most amazing, divine human being he had ever seen, with an amazing body and a massive cock.
"Wh-wh-what... who... why..." stuttered TAT.
"Ah TAT, don't worry, everyone is like that the first time they see him, you'll get used to his awesomeness soon enough," said lux, grinning and eating a rabbit stew, made from the last rabbit ever to have existed.
"But.. who is he?" asked TAT, still amazed.
"That's Comrade J."

Comrade J nodded, before putting away his massive cock which had once again slipped out of his jeans.

"Right TAT, now for the plan," said lux, "this is how we're gonna kill Chimx and escape. First, we're going to take this Backstreet Boys CD and...

[luxemburg89]

burn it as they're really quite shit. The fire created from this will draw our enemy out of the depths of the cave.'
Comrade_J then got out his penis and used it as a microphone to sing the british eurovision entry song to wake chimx up so he would see the fire and it went something like this:

[Comrade J]

"The Moon, she hangs like a cruel portrait
Soft winds whisper the bidding of trees
As this tragedy starts with a shattered glass heart
And the Midnightmare trampling of dreams
But oh, no tears please
Fear and pain may accompany Death
But it is desire that shepherds it's certainty
As We shall see..."

She was divinity's creature
That kissed the cold mirrors
A Queen of Snows
Far beyond compare
Lips attuned to symmetry
Sought Her everywhere
Dark liqoured eyes
An Arabian nightmare...

She shone on watercolours
Of my pondlife as pearl
Until those who couldn't have Her
Cut Her free of this World

That fateful Eve when...
The trees stank of sunset and camphor
Their lanterns chased phantoms and threw
An inquisitive glance, like the shadows they cast
On my love picking rue by the light of the moon

Putting reason to flight
Or to death as their way
They crept through woods mesmerized
By the taffeta Ley
Of Her hips that held sway
Over all they surveyed
Save a mist on the rise
(A deadly blessing to hide)
Her ghost in the fog

They raped left...
(Five men of God)
...Her ghost in the fog

Dawn discovered Her there
Beneath the Cedar's stare
Silk dress torn, Her raven hair
Flown to gown Her beauty bared
Was starred with frost, I knew Her lost
I wept 'til tears crept back to prayer

She'd sworn Me vows in fragrant blood
"Never to part
Lest jealous Heaven stole our hearts"

Then this I screamed:
"Come back to Me for
I was born in love with thee
So why should fate stand in between?"

And as I drowned Her gentle curves
With dreams unsaid and final words
I espied a gleam trodden to earth
The Church bell tower key...

The village mourned her by the by
For She'd been a witch
Their Men had longed to try
And I broke under Christ seeking guilty signs
My tortured soul on ice

A Queen of snow
Far beyond compare
Lips attuned to symmetry
Sought Her everywhere
Trappistine eyes
An Arabian nightmare...

She was Ersulie possessed
Of a milky white skin
My porcelain Yin
A graceful Angel of Sin

And so for Her...
The breeze stank of sunset and camphor
My lantern chased Her phantom and blew
Their Chapel ablaze and all locked in to a pain
Best reserved for judgement that their bible construed...

Putting reason to flight
Or to flame unashamed
I swept form cries
Mesmerized
By the taffeta Ley
Or Her hips that held sway
Over all those at bay
Save a mist on the rise
A final blessing to hide
Her ghost in the fog

And I embraced
Where lovers rot...
Her ghost in the fog

Her ghost in the fog!!!

"What the fuck?" asked Lux.
"Ah sorry man, I meant to sing the UK Eurovision entry, but it appears instead I sang Her Ghost In The Fog by Cradle of Filth, which actually should have been the entry anyway, because it's fucking amazing and has way better lyrics."

After he had finished, Chimx appeared in the cave, to see what the fire was.

"QUICK!" roared ddxt, "hit him with the...

[luxemburg89]

Crocodile (who had just wandered into the cave). TAT, remembering the ferocity of that wrestling match, swung the crocodile above his head and...

[Comrade J]

smashed it into Chimx's head, staining the surrounding wall crimson.

"Just doing that won't kill him" said Makhno, "here take this golf ball"

Lux took the golf ball, and asked what he should do next.

"Right, get your balls out," said Makhno, "and then put the golf ball...

[luxemburg89]

and, using Comrade_J's multi-purpose nob as a tee, hit it into the centre of the group of committee 300 members!'
'but what are my bollocks out for?' Lux asked.
'Oh, i just wanted to see how good they were...you keep them in good shape.'
'Thanks.' With that Lux, mustering all his strength, hit the ball into the centre of Committee 300 members where Jazzratt's masterplan was revealed. The golf ball hit a bomb, that Jazz had put in place, and blew up all the members of Committee 300. In his delight Comrade_J...

[Comrade J]

...blew his load with such force that his balls lost 99% of their mass in one billionth of a second, utterly destroying the bodies of the Committee 300 members.

"Damn, J, that is mighty impressive," said Gael Garcia Bernal, who just happened to be passing by, "you'll have to give me a closer look some time."

http://www.blogdecine.com/images/gael-garcia-bernal-bafta.jpg
(You just would, wouldn't you? :wub: )

Comrade J nodded, and watched Gael march down the tunnel outside.

"Now what?" chimed ddxt and Makhno in unison.

"I guess we go outside and wait with Jazzratt, I'm sure LeninGod will turn up soon enough, and tell us what's next," suggested TAT.

The group headed back down the passage, each clutching a crate of beer, of which there had been a giant pile in the cave. Reaching the entrance, they noticed Jazzratt sat on his tank outside, speaking loudly into his phone.

"Why? Ok. No problem... yes I'll tell them. Straight away, yes."
Jazzratt put the phone down.

"TAT, you have a new mission, Lenin said I am to help you," Jazzratt told him.

"Ah ok, great, another fucking mission," he moaned, "what is it this time?"

"I'll tell you when we're on the road, this place isn't safe."

So together, Jazzratt, Lux, TAT, Comrade J, Makhno and Ddxt climbed aboard Jazzratt's tank, and set off through the countryside, each sipping on a beer.

"So, Jazz, what's the mission" asked Makhno, perched on the edge of the tank.

"Well, we have to seek out wtfm8lol, and remove his penis, where the Demon Of Ignorance And Stupidity resides. According to Lenin, freeing him from this demon will make him one of the most intelligent people alive, and allow him to spread Marxist theory across the globe... doing this is the key to the revolution... but..."

"But what?" asked Lux, "seems simple enough to me."

"Well there is a problem... wtfm8lol does not reside on Earth," answered Jazzratt, "he lives...

[Entrails Konfetti]

on the Astral plane of the planet Uranus.

The only way to get there is too find a giant troll under one of the many bridges of Norway; slay it; climb into its stomach through any opening, and yell the words...

[luxemburg89]

I'll be there for yooooou,
when the rain starts to fall'

'MAKHNO!' Bellowed Comrade_J 'Turn Friends off we're trying to hear what the words we have to yell are!'
'Sorry, the words are...'

[Pirate Utopian]

SKEET SKEET SKEET!!!, and dont forget it"

[Honggweilo]

http://hisxpress.com/media/big_dick_club.jpg

^Comrade J

[Ultra-Violence]

so TAT and the crew set off to slay the troll when all of a suden nachie pops out and chalenges them to a dance match wich TAT thought would be easy since he was the worlds dance champoin but He Froze when nachie challenged him to dance to.....

[RedAnarchist]

Comrade J's strange warblings, which sounded to TAT like

[Qwerty Dvorak]

sexual innuendo

[luxemburg89]

But were, in fact, only a symbol of his deep love for deforestation. Outraged by Comrade_J's support of chopping down the Amazon, he focused all his anger and turned it on the enemy, he remembered what words of wisdom God-Lenin had given him when he was younger, they were:

[OneBrickOneVoice]

"Comrade_J is a fat piece of shit, a product of imperialism and bourgeois decadence"

[ahab]

'dont listen to me, im crazy!'

[OneBrickOneVoice]

using these words of wisdom, he was able to press onwards when suddenly, ahab popped up and tried to implement identity theft on God-Lenin. Luckily TAT knew exactly what to do...

[ahab]

Originally posted by [email protected] 11, 2007 10:37 pm
using these words of wisdom, he was able to press onwards when suddenly, ahab popped up and tried to implement identity theft on God-Lenin. Luckily TAT knew exactly what to do...
he took ahab back to his hotel room and tried to woo him with cheap wine and ciggarettes, but ahab didnt fall for it, he knew that anyone who sees lennin as god cant be trusted so he...

[RedAnarchist]

took out his

[Honggweilo]

Powerdrill strap-on!

http://www.headinjurytheater.com/images/oct1%20tetsuo%20the%20iron%20man%20jared%20hindman .jpg

[OneBrickOneVoice]

and drilled all the RAAN crabs out of ahab until he was a good, clean, revived...

[Honggweilo]

But alas, as TAT and Ahab returned to the cave, a horde of fresh taliRAAN crabs came out of nowhere to ambush our heroes. But as the end was neigh and they where only a few seconds from oblivion, suddenly out of of the depts of the lair came storming in another seering shellfish, but this one was greeted as a savior.. its was Comrade Marcel! the Stalinist Monster-crab!

http://www.atimes.com/atimes/images/crab-sm.gif

As the terrifying sight of the "crab of steel" made the taliRAAN crabs gag on their own inferiority, ddxt301...

[Ultra-Violence]

after Comrade marcel turned the taliRAAN crabs into a delicious crab milkshake
him and tat went on with their journey to slay the troll who lived under the bridge wich was no other than......

[Pirate Utopian]

Jabba the hut.
But Jabba was packing heat, and waited for TAT and his crew with a...

[Entrails Konfetti]

Gut bomb, which is a chili-dog inside a used condom, with a fuse at the end of it.

The former owner of the condom was a radioactive donkey, and when it climaxed, it would cum nitro-glycerine. As for the chili-dog, it was pretty much useless, but made the bomb look more disgusting anyways.

Jabba heard footsteps above the bridge, and with the gut bomb he...

[Honggweilo]

Accidently blew up Nachie, which was destroying streetlights with a crowbar in the name of the opressed workers, due to poor throwing and aim.. Which ofcourse is quite understandible considering Jabba's bodymass and short arms.

[Pirate Utopian]

TAT took his chance and he and the gang ran inside but they were stopped by really gangsta.....

[Honggweilo]

Ali B :lol:
http://www.extrafris.nl/upload/magazine/113/060628alib3oj.jpg
nah just kidding :rolleyes:


.....really Gangsta underground leftist, named Big Manifesto, of which his affiliation still remains a mystery. Anyway he was holding a 1 meter tall montana spraycan and a lighter with which he would...

[Pirate Utopian]

use to make spareribs because they are fuckin' awesome.
TAT approached BM and said.....

[Honggweilo]

"Thats a nice piece of meat your having there"

[Ultra-Violence]

"wel thnx" he replied and they sat down and shared the ribs and drank wine when lenin god again apeard and said "My son you must not trust this anarchist hippy hes fooling you by sharing his meat with you! ERADICATE HIM! grrr"

[Pirate Utopian]

"but dude he has wine, it's called.... hmm... Jesus Juice!, it's pretty good".
Lenin-God replied....

[Entrails Konfetti]

Originally posted by Big [email protected] 13, 2007 04:14 pm
"but dude he has wine, it's called.... hmm... Jesus Juice!, it's pretty good".
Lenin-God replied....
No its called CHE-JUICE, since I sent my only begotten son to the world for his sacrifice to save people their sins :Purpetuating Capitalism! You have much to learn, you are far from being an intellectual like myself, who knows what its like to work a hard days work by reading all the factory reports and spending hundreds of hours without sleep writing books slavishly! You have much to learn aswell because...

[Tower of Bebel]

"...otherwise you could turn into a friggin' **** before you even realize what's going on. So take my advice or else I will penetrate your ass by force!" But he wouldn't listen, and...

[OneBrickOneVoice]

sat down with Comrade Marcel and Big Manifesto and shared wine. Mid-way through the meal Che Guevara showed up and sat down and ate with them. He turned to TAT and said "take this and eat it, it is my body" and handed him a loaf of bread. He then reached for a cup of Che-Juice and said "take this and drink this, it is my blood" to which TAT replied..

[RedAnarchist]

what are you, a frigging grape?

[OneBrickOneVoice]

and Che Guevara replied, "does that even make fucking sense? I'm the son of God-Lenin BIATCH!", TAT had a sudden wave of understanding, he knew what he had to do...

[Honggweilo]

Jerk of Ché for some superior Che-Juice Nectar© which would make him immortal..

[OneBrickOneVoice]

TAT reached for Che's pants and unzipped the fly, out emerged a big hard throbing 16 inch...

[Honggweilo]

Cannon shell...

[Tower of Bebel]

after Ché was pleased, and of course TAT was pleased by this gorgious juice, both took a nap. Lenin-god watched them and he had noughty thoughts. His idea was to...

[Rage Against Right]

over through TAT with his secret power which was...

[Pirate Utopian]

the ability to sing karoake so bad it makes people melt like the nazi's in Raiders Of The Lost Ark.

[Ultra-Violence]

so tat proceeded and sang phli colins covers till everyones ears exploded...felling confident he tryed out for american idol.......

[Pirate Utopian]

Simon Cowell sighed seeing TAT coming in and said "What will you sing for us today?"
TAT replied...

[Honggweilo]

Minnie Ripperton - Loving You

[Pirate Utopian]

The jury told TAT to sing and Lenin-God's plan....

[ahab]

failed, TAT destroyed lenin and freed the people from his oppressive take of marxism and there was much rejoicing and dancing in the streets, like the end of star wars Episode 6 with teddy bears and shit, when all of the sudden....

[Jazzratt]

Someone shot TAT in the face with a gun, it was none other than that inveterate rogue and emphatic rhetorician* LSD.

*This is a real word, look it up.

[Entrails Konfetti]

Originally posted by [email protected] 14, 2007 08:40 pm
failed, TAT destroyed lenin and freed the people from his oppressive take of marxism and there was much rejoicing and dancing in the streets, like the end of star wars Episode 6 with teddy bears and shit, when all of the sudden....
TAT learned there was a civil war going on on Venus, between Hezbollastahn and the Loosely-United Federation of Anarchista (LUFA). TAT though up a plan immediately, he and whoever wanted to join him would make their way to the Kennedy Space Center in Florida USA, to steal a spacecraft and go to Venus.

He banged his fist into a nearby table to get everyones attention and announce his plan.
" Sisters, Brothers, and other relatives, I have just been informed that there is an insuing civil wars on the planet Venus between Hezbollastahn and our comrades the Loosely-United Federation of Anarchista aka LUFA. Comrades we must as Anarchists help our Comrades in battle-- however strange they look with their forked tounges and pointy heads, they are our comrades. Yes we will be hurled into the depth of space wearing suits that will make our crotches itch really really painfully, and we'll have to wear them through out battle on a planet we don't even live on, for a race of people we don't know much about. We must go to NASA headquarters and highjack a spacecraft and fly it to Venus-- who will join me?
....

[Entrails Konfetti]

Originally posted by Jazzrat
Someone shot TAT in the face with a gun, it was none other than that inveterate rogue and emphatic rhetorician* LSD.

TAT got up, and stomped LSDs brains out. then TAT learned about what was going on on venus (and everything still follows from my previous post)

[luxemburg89]

TAT felt somewhat foolish as people from Venus did not speak English and his beautiful speech had fallen on death ears. He could only do one more thing, he reached inside his bag (that he had made out of the crocodile he wrestled all that time ago at the oasis) and pulled out a long, cylindrical, slimey...

[Tower of Bebel]

stick, which he used to hit everyone of his enemies to death. But TAT had nu clue that the people of Venus had two lifes, and all of a sudden TAT was surrounded and his stick was broken. So he grabed for his...

[RedAnarchist]

huge mahine gun, which was shaped like a

[Pirate Utopian]

dead rockstar.
So that people might want to see the rockstar but in fact TAT would shoot them.
The dead rockstar was none other then...

[Luís Henrique]

... the Marquis de Sade...

[Pirate Utopian]

the old french drummer for Jimi Hendrix.

[RedAnarchist]

who used drum sticks made out of

[luxemburg89]

Eric Cantona, the old Fench footballer who played for Manchester United. Eric Cantona's chemical composition is thus:

[Comrade J]

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/2/25/HMPA-2D-skeletal.png/180px-HMPA-2D-skeletal.png


Which of course allows him to break up oligomers of lithium in deprotonation reactions, which he was infamously sent off for in a match against Crystal Palace in 1995, when he ripped a H+ molecule from the face of a passing defender.

Also, this meant Eric Cantona was perfect drumstick material, something which was also realised by the evil tyrant...

(Edit - Btw this story sucks. Make it good again :( )

[RedAnarchist]

Tragik Klown, who had usurped Malte in the year 2300 by

[luxemburg89]

playing George Fornby's greatest hits. Then, suddenly, with a sound like thunder that would have torn the heavens asunder, Lenin spoke again:

"Thou shalt embark on the quest I beseech
And there thou shalt find thy heart
Washed up, alone on an empty beach
devoid of love, science and art
But fear not tis not wholly out of reach
To make it whole again find what thou art.
To find who you are, to make you man
You must hunt down pusher robot, deep in Iran"

Our hero was amazed by Lenin's knowledge of the Ottava Rima stanza form, and its a-b-a-b-a-b-c-c rhyme scheme that baffles so many. He decided he would go to Iran, to help him on this quest he would need...

[RedAnarchist]

the help of Fawkes, a giant phoneix who loved the smell of gunpowder

[luxemburg89]

Into Iran our hero went, carrying with him nothing but a small bag full of supplies, weapons (very small ones) and condoms. Although Lenin-God's advice was quite correct, he did not know whereabouts in Iran pusher robot was hiding, and Fawkes had no idea either. They decided they would have to consult...

[RedAnarchist]

Yoda... I mean RevMarksMan, who was

[Pirate Utopian]

ordering a pizza at his place.

[RedAnarchist]

"Hi", said RMM, "Do you deliver?"

"Yeah, of course", replied the takeaway guy

"Ok, I'll have a liver and onion pizza, please"

"What!? We don't do liver on pizzas!", exclaimed the delivery guy

"But you said that you deliver (doliver)", replied RMM


(note - I cant take credit for this, its a radio station prank call that you can hear @ http://youtube.com/watch?v=y0TxfwB3BWQ)

[Fawkes]

RevMARKSman ended up just ordering a cheese pizza with an unknown to him ingredient on it: the pizza man thought that RevMARKSman's joke on the phone was so horrendous, he ejaculated semen onto RevMARKSman's pizza. RevMARKSman---recognizing the taste of semen---immediately chased after the pizza man....

[RedAnarchist]

caught him and then proceeded to

[BOZG]

tear out the pizzaman's liver, while laughing maniacally and....

[Fawkes]

Cock slap him in the face so hard that he had a mushroom tattoo on his face for three weeks. When the bruise finally healed, the pizza man went to visit his friend....

[RedAnarchist]

BOZG, who had an impressive collection of

[BOZG]

new Soviet military uniforms.http://file023a.bebo.com/12/large/2006/11/09/04/146832559a2499957590b41091854l.jpg

[RedAnarchist]

And then they got TC to give birth to 1000 babies, which were dressed in these uniforms, so that the babies could be an army of

[Fawkes]

Butt plugs that smell like....

[BOZG]

crusty anarchists...

[RedAnarchist]

Freshly masssacred bourgoisie pigs and

[OneBrickOneVoice]

the freshly cracked open head of a German SS officer who had been just hit in the head with the but of the PPSH automatic rifle of a Soviet Red Army Partisan

[Tower of Bebel]

TC's babies quickly discovered the internets and spammed the hell out of stormfront with pictures of goatses and Fawkes' mother...

[Pirate Utopian]

The babies' crib was discovered by scumfronters wich attacked it with....

[Angry Young Man]

Rowntree's Fruit Pastilles.

[BOZG]

Their delicious fruity flavours were symbolic to the British White Nationalists desire that no artificial colourings or flavours should be allowed into the main food source of the white British working class.

[Pirate Utopian]

The babies had a secret weapon however...

[Angry Young Man]

And RR completely lost wtf the other 2 were talking about, as fruit pastilles are a multi-ethnic and tolerant community, unlike those ku klux milkybars and skinhead revels.

And where were babies mentioned. The pastilles shook and trembled at the thought of these liberal jelly babies, rivals of the leftist pastille movement of YORK! All the red pastilles...

[Tower of Bebel]

...made the scumfronters ass-rape each other. Meanwhile TC had a date with comrade Stalin, the secretary-general of the sexy moustache company.