Sinister Intents
26th April 2015, 00:08
I usually post without caring if I get any kind of feedback. I also tend to complain and say strange shit and have a generally negative, black-and-white outlook. So I'm sure there's a negative image of me, but also a positive. My problem is that I care what others think WAY too much and other peoples' feelings tend to be more important than my own.
My therapist told me to come back here, and RedAnarchist said their may be negative consequences. Yeah, I'm taking too long to get to my point for this first part. So, what I'm trying to get at is that I start CBT soon, I've been talking to a therapist for a bit and it's seeming to help and I think I'll get over my anxiety, paranoia crap eventually.
I don't know why I typed the above exactly because It's kinda non-sequitur to what I'm going to bring up. I think I was trying to lead into the subject of eyesight and memory but I can't think of how to connect it.
On the subject of eyesight: Why is it that I wake up there is a noticeable and significant difference between both eyes? My left eye seems to see more a blue tone, and my right has more of an orange tone. When I was looking at my girlfriend's yellow shirt; it appeared to my left eye a yellow-green, and to my right it appeared a more orange. As I woke up more it was a yellow color like normal and the difference in colors went away. Everything seemingly is more blue on the left and orange on the right. I'm not sure what I could search to find out about this. My eyesight also seems to be getting worse with age.
There is also my memory. It doesn't matter how much literature I read and how often I read it, but I pretty much forget everything I read and can't answer things the way I'd like. When I know the answer I want to say I can't say it but I know it's there. I've read a lot of stuff and I only retained a little and I've been into politics for years and I can't remember crap about what's in Kropotkin's Conquest of Bread for example. I've been reading Bordiga, and I can't remember a single thing from what I read last night. I think this subject of memory I should bring up to my psychiatrist/therapist, but I figured it's worth bringing up.
My therapist told me to come back here, and RedAnarchist said their may be negative consequences. Yeah, I'm taking too long to get to my point for this first part. So, what I'm trying to get at is that I start CBT soon, I've been talking to a therapist for a bit and it's seeming to help and I think I'll get over my anxiety, paranoia crap eventually.
I don't know why I typed the above exactly because It's kinda non-sequitur to what I'm going to bring up. I think I was trying to lead into the subject of eyesight and memory but I can't think of how to connect it.
On the subject of eyesight: Why is it that I wake up there is a noticeable and significant difference between both eyes? My left eye seems to see more a blue tone, and my right has more of an orange tone. When I was looking at my girlfriend's yellow shirt; it appeared to my left eye a yellow-green, and to my right it appeared a more orange. As I woke up more it was a yellow color like normal and the difference in colors went away. Everything seemingly is more blue on the left and orange on the right. I'm not sure what I could search to find out about this. My eyesight also seems to be getting worse with age.
There is also my memory. It doesn't matter how much literature I read and how often I read it, but I pretty much forget everything I read and can't answer things the way I'd like. When I know the answer I want to say I can't say it but I know it's there. I've read a lot of stuff and I only retained a little and I've been into politics for years and I can't remember crap about what's in Kropotkin's Conquest of Bread for example. I've been reading Bordiga, and I can't remember a single thing from what I read last night. I think this subject of memory I should bring up to my psychiatrist/therapist, but I figured it's worth bringing up.