Since we're talking about fetishes elsewhere on the site.

[M-L-C-F]

What's your safety word? Oklahoma is the safety word on Jackass. I asked my friend what his safety word was. He said that "safety words are for quitters". I don't got a safety word at this time.

[Dagoth Ur]

I don't do anything that requires a safety word except for "stop" or "whoa, no". It bothers me that people have sex that does require safety terms, like it makes me sad.

But if I had to choose I'd pick something you would never say during sex like grandma.

[The Feral Underclass]

It bothers me that people have sex that does require safety terms, like it makes me sad.

Why would what two (or more) consenting adults do in their own private lives make you sad? Why would you even think about it?

[Hrafn]

But if I had to choose I'd pick something you would never say during sex like grandma.

Or would you? :ohmy:

[Dagoth Ur]

Why would what two (or more) consenting adults do in their own private lives make you sad? Why would you even think about it?
I avoid thinking about it. But good job just assuming that I want to make them stop or interfere with anyone's sex life.

[The Feral Underclass]

I avoid thinking about it. But good job just assuming that I want to make them stop or interfere with anyone's sex life.


What are you talking about? You said it makes you sad, I asked you why. That's pretty straight forward...


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[Dagoth Ur]

There are lots of oppressive vibes in safe word type sexual acts.

[Rosa Partizan]

it's not oppressive as long as the submissive part has full control and awareness about what happens and is going to happen and can make it stop whenever they want and are able to draw the line the way they want it.

[Sinister Intents]

October.

[Dagoth Ur]

As though consent negates oppression.

[Dennis the 'Bloody Peasant']

I don't do / have never done anything that would require one. I may do yet, depends on what my wife is comfortable with.
If I had one, it would be 'bunny'.

[BIXX]

But if I had to choose I'd pick something you would never say during sex like grandma.


What kind of sex are you having where you don't say "grandma"?

Let's see... Over time I've kinda had a few, but my favorite one was probably "homework".

[Rosa Partizan]

I rarely did stuff that requested a safeword, but when I did, I picked "sugar" (in German, which would be "Zucker").

[The Feral Underclass]

There are lots of oppressive vibes in safe word type sexual acts.

That might be why they enjoy it. Stop being so judgemental. You have no right to pass comment on other people's consensual sex lives. Mind your own business.

[Dagoth Ur]

I'm not the one passing judgment. You're projecting dear.

[Anglo-Saxon Philistine]

I'm not the one passing judgment. You're projecting dear.

Well - I'm drunk as all hell but hear me out - if I saw someone saying that me fucking other men makes him sad I'd be suspicious as hell. On the other hand, I can understand that anyone who identifies as female has probably experienced so much oppressive shit in their life they're a bit leery of relationships that seemingly reproduce this oppression.

I don't know, though, properly carried out, dom-sub relationships are primarilt a spectacle, a play, while seemingly carrying out the logic of patriarchy to its conclusions they more often than not invert it. And in fact the sub is in control in my experience. Which is not to say there isn't a lot of oppressive shit in these relationships. But that goes for all kinds of relationships.

[M-L-C-F]

Damn it you guys! If I knew this was gonna get derailed into a slightly more serious debate. I'd have posted this topic in Non-Political, so we could all farm reputation points. :laugh:

[Dagoth Ur]

@Vincent: that's actually a fair argument, and I didn't really think abou the full implications of my statement no matter how true it is for me. I'm all for people doing what they want, I do heroin occasionally, which makes some people sad too.

[Vladimir Innit Lenin]

why would what two (or more) consenting adults do in their own private lives make you sad? Why would you even think about it?

because the state has to know everything otherwise the ploteriat revolution fail!

[Vladimir Innit Lenin]

oh i see it won't let me type in caps, that's totes negated my posts previous urgency :(

[Dagoth Ur]

In a proletarian paradise oppressive sexual forms will wither away.

[The Feral Underclass]

I'm not the one passing judgment. You're projecting dear.


Projecting what, exactly? I'm not defending my sexual practices. I don't engage in the kind of sex acts that require safe words. I'm pretty vanilla by most standards. I'm just calling out bullshit when I see it.

You came into a tread about sexual fetishes and said those that require safe words make you sad, stating some spurious reason about oppression. How do you imagine that's not judgemental?

Also, can you fuck off with this 'dear' crap. You're not my fucking grandmother.


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[The Feral Underclass]

In a proletarian paradise oppressive sexual forms will wither away.


Oh no, not judgemental at all...


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[Rosa Partizan]

In a proletarian paradise oppressive sexual forms will wither away.

this is the kind of post that's far more telling in terms of judgement than you intended to. Truly pathetic.

[synthesis]

I thought DU was joking there or at least being facetious, but I guess she can clear that up for us.

[The Feral Underclass]

I thought DU was joking there or at least being facetious, but I guess she can clear that up for us.


Joking or not, it is pretty consistent with her expressed views in this thread.


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[Dagoth Ur]

Big surprise self-referential comedy would fall flat on its face in a RevLeft thread about sex.

I don't care about oppressive sex that people consent to, I don't consider people perverts who like sexual acts different from my preference, or think anyone should treat someone negatively because of their preference. This does not mean people are allowed to insist that no one question the oppressive nature of aspects of sexuality. Sure I could have worded my post better, but those of you who have jumped down my throat over a passing statement could have tried to hear me out before rushing to actually judging me and ad-homing me as "judgmental".

Having a discussion on how sexualized, feigned-lack-of-consent, rape themes are a direct result of patriarchy on our societies doesn't seem like it would be productive with you people at this point (which for the record is not the fault of those compelled to engage in consensual oppressive sexual acts) So I'll just let this die, unless someone wants to post more than a few one line rageshit posts.

[Rosa Partizan]

actually, I wrote several posts on why Bdsm and stuff can be problematic, especially with the woman being the submissive part. This does not mean that this preference itself has to be oppressive. It all depends on how insightful and reflective the partners are, in how far equal and respectful they treat each other and that the submissive partner always has to be in control of whats happening and can stop at ANY point. only under these circumstances do I find such practices acceptable and not unhealthy or oppressive.

[Dagoth Ur]

No the entire thing is a product of patriarchy and oppressive sexual attitudes. These aren't traumatic for the consenting of course, but they are a part and parcel of the same overarching phenomenon.

[Rosa Partizan]

well if you go that way, almost every female behavior can be considered oppressive....like, everything you do to measure up to beauty standards, to be liked by a man and stuff. I understand that structure of thought, but no one can live up to such a truly non-oppressive standard.

[Dagoth Ur]

We can't as we've already been raised oppressed and will carry these birthmarks to our graves no matter how much we try to escape them. But humanity can achieve post-oppressive sexual activity. Primarily by breaking the back of the patriarchy.

[Trap Queen Voxxy]

My safety word is "stop or I'll cut your dick off."

[PhoenixAsh]

I like the assumption that the oppression of women in social interaction will stop after a revolution. I presume this is the logical conclusion to the false notion that socialism/communism can't be mysogenist or be practiced by mysogenists and that logically mysogeny can and will not exist in a revolution by a group of people (socialists) who have a very troubled history with the position of women.

Second I like how the equation is that men/women can not be naturally dominant/sumissive and that somehow socialism/communism supercedes personality and natural traits. So...I like rough sex because I like the feeling of the conflict between pleasure and pain. I like being dominated (sometimes) and belittled (to some extend) because I equally like to feel the conflict between shame and pleasure and the feeling/illusion of not bieng in controll and how these chemicals interact in my body. I suppose this would all somehow wither away magically when we live in a socialist society. I don't think so.

[human strike]

Pretty boring but I usually use a traffic light system where 'green' means everything is good, 'amber/orange' means stop that specific thing, and 'red' means stop completely.


There are lots of oppressive vibes in safe word type sexual acts.

It's funny, I find the opposite is true.


That might be why they enjoy it. Stop being so judgemental. You have no right to pass comment on other people's consensual sex lives. Mind your own business.

Exactly.