What's on your mind X

[RedAnarchist]

Continued from here - http://www.revleft.com/vb/whats-your-mindi-t186713/index.html?t=186713.

[Domela Nieuwenhuis]

Way too much really.

Overanalysing myself, politics and the world.

I am so bad at tactics. As soon as i think i finally know what someone else is going to do, they almost never do that...

[Domela Nieuwenhuis]

Also: more than 50% of the comments in this thread right now are mine :laugh:

[human strike]

It was good to meet Right Hand of Jah at the Bookfair on Saturday; he seemed like a really sound guy. I don't think I was a very good host though, I had super bad anxiety most of the day, like worse than I've had in months. Crowds can do that to me, especially crowds where I know there are likely to be people I don't wanna see. It was weird to feel like that again though, I've been feeling really good a lot of the rest of the time. In the evening I got very drunk which made me feel a lot better until I got home and basically broke down on a friend. But to be honest I needed a good cry (I think I mentioned it before here) and it made me feel better. It had been building up for a while, since I finished counselling I guess. There's still shit in my head that hasn't been resolved. I've been feeling quite paranoid and anxious about a couple of things, pretty big things I suppose.

[Futility Personified]

Thanks man, you too. Sorry if I was a bit overbearing but I was frying pretty damn hard on the anxiety stakes too, you were a good host! If you want someone to chat to i'll pm you my FB, i'll give you a shout next time my mates band is up in your neck of the woods.

[human strike]

Do it. Do you know how to find me on FB?

[Quail]

Solidarity unionism, what I want to say about it and why do I always volunteer to do scary things like talk in front of people?

[Sinister Intents]

I feel like I have something vicious to say.

[BIXX]

Also I just made the least intelligent post ever. (http://www.revleft.com/vb/showpost.php?p=2745147&postcount=5)

Nevermind it was slightly more intelligent than all posts by BolSickle.

[Domela Nieuwenhuis]

Nevermind it was slightly more intelligent than all posts by BolSickle.

Sorry to burst your bubble, but beating BolSick isn't really that hard :laugh:

[Ele'ill]

There's nothing to celebrate on May 1st. Everything bad is bad. Everything good is actually worse. Give me my admin avatar size back so I can use my old avatar. It's all over, nothing is eventual.

http://37.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mc714lwX1b1qdnttuo1_500.jpg

[Sinister Intents]

I wish I had a girlfriend :( I feel so lonely and I miss that feeling of being with someone.

WHY?!?!? silsnkvdwsb hil rfbd fucking why won't Abbie fucking talk to me anny more!?!?!? ljsigkah ighasfan jkl

[Crabbensmasher]

I wish I had a girlfriend :( I feel so lonely and I miss that feeling of being with someone.

WHY?!?!? silsnkvdwsb hil rfbd fucking why won't Abbie fucking talk to me anny more!?!?!? ljsigkah ighasfan jkl

Don't look for love to fill holes. It may work for awhile, but it's dangerous. You do get that feeling of being with someone, of sharing affection and caring for somebody, and that's amazing, but you're pretty much ruled by your emotions. You don't fall in love with the person, you fall in love with love itself. The person could turn out to be terrible to you, but you'll keep going back like a drug. You don't think rationally. You get used.

Trust me, I've been there. It's dangerous. You can really screw yourself over.

[Sinister Intents]

So basically I'm right in feeling I shouldn't get into a relationship again. It'll be like being with Kyra all over again...

I'll just give up on the emotions eventually I hope....

[BIXX]

So basically I'm right in feeling I shouldn't get into a relationship again. It'll be like being with Kyra all over again...

I'll just give up on the emotions eventually I hope....


Like I said to you before, I think that we have to change our expectations of "love". I mean, love (as our society tells us it is) is really unhealthy and super constraining.

[#FF0000]

So basically I'm right in feeling I shouldn't get into a relationship again. It'll be like being with Kyra all over again...

I'll just give up on the emotions eventually I hope....

Go for it if it happens but don't go looking for a relationship to feel better about yourself

[consuming negativity]

You have to be able to love yourself to be able to love someone else in a stable, healthy romantic relationship. You'll say it's bologna before repeating the cycle again... and again... and again. Nobody can make you happy but yourself. People can be there for you when you need someone. People can make you feel fantastic and give you good sex, compliments, affection, and care about you the way nobody else ever has, and make you feel those feelings that feel so damn good. But they can't fix your problems for you or lead you out of the darkness. For some people, they never find their way out. I don't think I'm out yet, either, although I'm well on my way. I tried a relationship after having sworn off them for several years and found that my relative maturity and mental clarity helped me to be a great partner for a little while. That is, until pragmatic concerns got between myself and the other person and forced it to be over. Don't be discouraged; you are worth being loved and I love you right now, whoever you are, wherever you are. But relationships are not a panacea and they won't give you that part of you that you feel is missing, no matter how much it hurts, and no matter how great the person seems to be.

[Ceallach_the_Witch]

bad back from sitting hunched over

heartburn from coffee

screenburnt eyes

[human strike]

So I think I might be about to be dumped. Now I have been feeling quite paranoid lately, but there are some concerning signs. :/

[The Jay]

I had to work yesterday. I'm not too pleased.

[human strike]

Oh and I'm also concerned that one of my best friends is in love with me. Again, this may be paranoia, but I'm not sure how to deal with that if it's not...

[BIXX]

So I think I might be about to be dumped. Now I have been feeling quite paranoid lately, but there are some concerning signs. :/


I feel this way frequently.

[A Revolutionary Tool]

I've had the same dream three nights in a row, it's weird. The first two nights they felt terrifying but last night I felt familiar with it all and in control. I'm always at this lake in the woods with cabins spread across the vast terrain and it's like a survival horror game. First night it was just hordes of zombies goin after my class from high school. Second night it was basically the same, running from cabin to cabin escaping zombies with things I called ghouls in my dream. Green mofos that could run and open doors, it sucked. But last night I could super jump far distances even from the water and it was just my dad and grandpa with me. There were those ghouls, giant bear things like the one from the new Hobbit movies, and werewolves. I felt so in control summoning weapons at will, summoning a bear to fight the bad one, etc, etc, then my step-brother wakes me up knocking on the front door because he has no keys to the house :glare:. *sigh* Back to being your friendly neighborhood sandwich artist. Why can't we just sleep forever?

[TheGodlessUtopian]

Guess I will be posting up a couple short study guides either later tonight or sometime tomorrow. Have had them saved for so long now that it is absurd I haven't actually added them yet. If my memory serves me well then it will be a couple by Mao and one by Lenin.

[Anglo-Saxon Philistine]

So, I need to have a wart removed - seriously, the little bastard is tougher than I'll ever be, surviving vigorous freezing that nearly took half my finger off - and I got a referral according to the new system that doesn't actually allow the dermatologist to send me to wart removal.

And why was the new system introduced? To save money of course. To save money for such projects as the Catholic University, paying for professional football and so on.

I mean, good grief. I know it's a minor thing but I'm absolutely seeing red.

Kill priests with orbital lasers! Slap the kneecaps off football players with rusty axes! Send war veterans into space! Throw newborn Croat children into woodchippers! Burn things! Kill! Argh!

[Brutus]

I really want someone to punch the crap out of me.

[Rosa Partizan]

posting here makes me kinda sad, because even when I got the feeling that I wrote a rather good post, someone's going to write something much more sophisticated and elabote and I'm like, Goddamn I could've written that, too (when actually I couldn't have).

[human strike]

I really want someone to punch the crap out of me.

Sorry but do you mean in a kinky way?

[consuming negativity]

posting here makes me kinda sad, because even when I got the feeling that I wrote a rather good post, someone's going to write something much more sophisticated and elabote and I'm like, Goddamn I could've written that, too (when actually I couldn't have).

It's somewhat discouraging to consistently have my ideas articulated better by a stranger than through my own posting. It makes me hesitant to post sometimes because it seems like every time I've written something I'm proud of, someone else comes along and says it much more eloquently than I did. I've been getting better with practice, but I'm just so jealous of the way they hit it right on the mark. I wish I could do that.

[Quail]

I feel like that all the time. Especially sometimes when it feels like my brain just isn't working and everything I post is slightly incoherent nonsense.

[The Intransigent Faction]

So, an acquaintance of mine from a couple of courses and a friend of a friend at university (who doesn't really know my political views) is apparently running to be nominated as the candidate for the federal Liberal Party in my riding. I got a message from her out of the blue asking if I would be interested in helping her with her campaign.

I've grown up in an "upper-middle class" suburban lifestyle and am hardly "lifestylist" by any stretch of the word, but actively helping out in a nomination campaign for an aspiring bourgeois politician feels like crossing some kind of awkward line of cognitive dissonance.

Oh the conundrums of being a socialist in Liberal suburbia...

I'm open to any serious or not-so-serious suggestions. :lol:

[#FF0000]

It seems like a lot of people around me are less than honest with me for some reason or another. I've had a couple people in my life who I feel like only said what I wanted to hear or said things they didn't really believe to try to impress me, or other people who lied to me because they thought they were letting me down easy or something, and the thought is really grating on me.

[Brutus]

Sorry but do you mean in a kinky way?

Nope. But now you've got me thinking

[Rosa Partizan]

It's somewhat discouraging to consistently have my ideas articulated better by a stranger than through my own posting. It makes me hesitant to post sometimes because it seems like every time I've written something I'm proud of, someone else comes along and says it much more eloquently than I did. I've been getting better with practice, but I'm just so jealous of the way they hit it right on the mark. I wish I could do that.


I feel like that all the time. Especially sometimes when it feels like my brain just isn't working and everything I post is slightly incoherent nonsense.

look who's talking, you are 2 of those elaborate people here that make me sad on a regular basis. Quail's drunk posts are better than my sober ones :laugh: :crying:

[#FF0000]

mmmm orange vodka

[Rosa Partizan]

dude you should get some sleep

[#FF0000]

Nope. Fixing my sleep schedule today. I've hardly seen the sun since i started working at Amazon.

[Rosa Partizan]

after my nail polish and perfume addiction, it's lipstick now. Patriarchy leave me alone :( :grin:

[human strike]

I'm not sure I can be bothered with anything at the moment. I'm not sure I can even be bothered to write this post. I know today I haven't bothered to eat. It's not that I don't have things to do - there's plenty; too much in fact. The last week has been pretty shit. I've been feeling sad, angry, lonely, stressed, anxious, paranoid... Some days are great and other moments are good, but generally I'm not doing great. :/

Re. my post from yesterday: She says she still wants to see me, but she's not being especially reassuring. She's a terrible communicator and very anxious and awkward; I just don't really know what the fuck's going on with her and it's quite frustrating. Anyway, I don't mean to imply that this is something serious, it's really very casual, but stuff like this always plays on my mind a lot.


Nope. Fixing my sleep schedule today. I've hardly seen the sun since i started working at Amazon.

Work surrounds us and lays siege to our souls like a falling darkness. For you, today the sun will not shine.

More stuff: Perhaps it's time I actually thought about seriously doing something with my life; like, long-term plans. Up until now my main (only?) concern has been relationships, but they're so fleeting and draining (also focusing on other people instead of myself? Not healthy!). And I definitely can't stay on the dole forever. How does one train to become a counselor? It's either that or a hand-to-mouth career in journalism, and I'm shit with deadlines. I don't wanna be no full-time activist neither - I feel like too much of an activist as it is.

[Ele'ill]

just took 200mg of caffeine, chewing nicotine gum, got a recently fed cat curled up next to me, gonna cut my hair normal despite wanting to leave it like this with it growing out so I can dye the ends in the back but have become increasingly more and more disquieted with/about myself and don't want to embrace any part of me I want to be not here. I am going to finish stick and poke and begin another. I am going to make vegan BLTs and drink beer though def. not in that order and probably not even BLT's probably just LT's, vegan lettuce and tomatoes and maybe just vegan lettuces with tons of vegan mayo and pepper, and watch many movies and probably stay up late reading or listening to music

[Ele'ill]

It seems like a lot of people around me are less than honest with me for some reason or another. I've had a couple people in my life who I feel like only said what I wanted to hear or said things they didn't really believe to try to impress me, or other people who lied to me because they thought they were letting me down easy or something, and the thought is really grating on me.

I would call them out on it and request a discussion about their behavior. It doesn't have to be prefaced as confrontational or anything and it doesn't have to be as official as i just made such a thing sound but the discussion will allow them to listen to your concerns and you'll find out if you are right or if you are maybe off the mark.

[Sinister Intents]

I gotta seriously stop doing this to myself....

[Rosa Partizan]

heard a Taylor Swift-song for the first time. I felt like begging for a shot to the head.

[Sinister Intents]

I added a lot of Trots to my ignore list, minus the ones that I like

[motion denied]

The weekend is over, pain is ahead.

[cyu]

It's somewhat discouraging to consistently have my ideas articulated better by a stranger than through my own posting. It makes me hesitant to post sometimes because it seems like every time I've written something I'm proud of, someone else comes along and says it much more eloquently than I did. I've been getting better with practice, but I'm just so jealous of the way they hit it right on the mark. I wish I could do that.Reminds me of two quotes - not by me xD

http://everything2.com/title/Your+radical+ideas+about+religion+as+a+mechanism+o f+social+control+have+already+occurred+to+others

and

"If you steal from 1 you are plagarizing. If you steal from 10 you are doing research. If you steal from 100 you are an expert."

So here's the plan:

1. Figure out which writers have the one-liners you like most.
2. Read as much from them as you have time for.
3. Every time you come across a great quote, save it aside.
4. Put all the great quotes into categories for future use.
5. If you ever have to write about something you have a category for, pull some quotes out from your collection.
6. If you're lucky, the more you do this, a feel for writing like them starts seeping into your brain.
7. Start experimenting by doing stuff like taking the first third from one writer's quote, and attaching it to the 2nd and last parts of other quotes. [Meme-splicing :lol:]
8. Eventually nobody will be able to tell which ideas are yours and which are from "geniuses" ;)

[Psycho P and the Freight Train]

heard a Taylor Swift-song for the first time. I felt like begging for a shot to the head.

Ha, the sad thing is she's not even nearly as horrible as other pop artists. Music is dead and is never coming back unfortunately.

[#FF0000]

Ha, the sad thing is she's not even nearly as horrible as other pop artists. Music is dead and is never coming back unfortunately.

sounds like you don't listen to a lot of music hm hm hm

[Psycho P and the Freight Train]

sounds like you don't listen to a lot of music hm hm hm

Well I sort of phrased my point poorly.

What I mean is that there still is good music out there, sure. But there is one thing that is VERY different from today than in the past with music. Good music is not played on the radio anymore. The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Nirvana (It's ok if you don't like those bands I'm just choosing some to represent different decades) were all played on the radio during their time and were "mainstream." Nowadays, what is mainstream is horrible music, and good music is seen as "hipster" and "indie" because it isn't generally played on the radio.

[Sinister Intents]

I just listen to death metal, black metal, and a variety of punk. I know nothing of this mainstream you talk of. Is it brutal?

[The Intransigent Faction]

Well I sort of phrased my point poorly.

What I mean is that there still is good music out there, sure. But there is one thing that is VERY different from today than in the past with music. Good music is not played on the radio anymore. The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Nirvana (It's ok if you don't like those bands I'm just choosing some to represent different decades) were all played on the radio during their time and were "mainstream." Nowadays, what is mainstream is horrible music, and good music is seen as "hipster" and "indie" because it isn't generally played on the radio.

Yeah, I get most of my music from YouTube. Then I dig more and find stuff I never would have found without knowing what to look for. There's something kind of gratifying about that, though, even if you wouldn't object to the radio playing decent or even good stuff.

[#FF0000]

What I mean is that there still is good music out there, sure. But there is one thing that is VERY different from today than in the past with music. Good music is not played on the radio anymore. The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Nirvana (It's ok if you don't like those bands I'm just choosing some to represent different decades) were all played on the radio during their time and were "mainstream." Nowadays, what is mainstream is horrible music, and good music is seen as "hipster" and "indie" because it isn't generally played on the radio.

Nah, even back then there was tons and tons and tons of bad music that got way way way more airtime than these bands, though, and what a lot of those bands are known for now weren't even well known or popular back then, relegated to the b-sides and never making it to chart.

What I'm saying is that things are pretty much the same now as they were back then.

[#FF0000]

I just listen to death metal, black metal, and a variety of punk. I know nothing of this mainstream you talk of. Is it brutal?

it can be but not in the way you're thinking

[The Intransigent Faction]

I just listen to death metal, black metal, and a variety of punk. I know nothing of this mainstream you talk of. Is it brutal?

Having been subjected to the radio against my will, I can say without hesitation, YES!

y6Sxv-sUYtM

Go ahead. Try to sit through this without feeling an urge to set your computer on fire. I dare you.

[Sinister Intents]

it can be but not in the way you're thinking

What would brutal pop be lol?

[#FF0000]

fuck u if u dont like pharell

[Sinister Intents]

Having been subjected to the radio against my will, I can say without hesitation, YES!

y6Sxv-sUYtM

Go ahead. Try to sit through this without feeling an urge to set your computer on fire. I dare you.

Its starting...

[#FF0000]

What would brutal pop be lol?

WIKqgE4BwAY

[The Intransigent Faction]

What would brutal pop be lol?

Slipknot? :grin:

[Sinister Intents]

Slipknot? :grin:

Ewwwwww....

Pharrell Williams is good music actually :)

[Psycho P and the Freight Train]

Ehh, fair enough. I don't want to sound like one of those people who is constantly going on about "le wrong generation" and "everything back then was so awesome I was born in the wrong time", but I just cannot help but feel that music today is seriously worse than it used to be. Mostly because people don't even use instruments anymore, lol.

My fear is that, in 20 or 30 years, people like me will look at Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber and say "man THAT was good music. The music today is terrible."

[#FF0000]

Ehh, fair enough. I don't want to sound like one of those people who is constantly going on about "le wrong generation" and "everything back then was so awesome I was born in the wrong time", but I just cannot help but feel that music today is seriously worse than it used to be.

You know actually you might not be too, too off-base here. (http://www.avclub.com/article/todays-music-is-too-loud-and-all-sounds-the-same-c-83026)

There was always bad music, but the bad music today is just a lot more boring, I think.


Mostly because people don't even use instruments anymore, lol.

Well I don't think that's a problem. Beeps n boops are instruments too, imo.


My fear is that, in 20 or 30 years, people like me will look at Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber and say "man THAT was good music. The music today is terrible."

I don't think that'll happen with Bieber. I think Lady Gaga is already recognized for being hella derivative.

Wilco and Radiohead are the dad-rock of the future

[Psycho P and the Freight Train]

You know actually you might not be too, too off-base here. (http://www.avclub.com/article/todays-music-is-too-loud-and-all-sounds-the-same-c-83026)

There was always bad music, but the bad music today is just a lot more boring, I think.



Well I don't think that's a problem. Beeps n boops are instruments too, imo.



I don't think that'll happen with Bieber. I think Lady Gaga is already recognized for being hella derivative.

Wilco and Radiohead are the dad-rock of the future

Ha, that article is funny. And yeah, I guess it's pretentious and insulting to say that beeps and bops aren't music or whatever. But I don't know.

I hope you're right about the dad rock thing though. I am scared that dad rock won't even exist anymore in the future and that it will turn into pop-rap combinations. But maybe my problem is with genres instead of music in general, because I only criticize pop and rap. BUT, I don't think that's the case because I think pop and rap in the 90's was perfectly fine.

[consuming negativity]

It's probably a function of musical accessibility. Back in the day, and by in the day I mean like the 1700s, you became a musician by being trained basically from birth and you composed for royals. Then, things got better as more people could afford instruments, and you have the amazing music of the Jazz era in particular where being a successful musician required still being intelligent and knowing your instrument, but more and more people who were able to achieve this were able to get access to the instruments they needed.

However, we've sorta hit a watershed moment where nowadays, anyone can quickly pirate FrootyLoops or become the next Disney™ music product (all rights reserved). Lower levels of comprehension regarding musical theory combined with music aimed at the lowest common denominator of listening (see: everything is in 4/4 using the same chord progressions, easy keys, and around the same BPM).

Of course, while overall, the general amount of musical difference has lowered, I have a feeling that if you looked at the extremes, some of the most interesting and complex music in history is being made by talented artists through the modern toolset that would have made such compositions impossible in the good old days. The actual variety of music we have is certainly much wider than at any other period in human history; it's just that such a large portion of our music is "radio crack" in comparison to before.

[#FF0000]

I do wonder what the hell is going on with rock though since it's basically irrelevant now and hardly anything good or innovative has come out of it for a couple decades now. I mean, yeah there's always tons of good underground stuff but there are always at least some good "mainstream" acts of any genre -- except in rock all of a sudden.

but pop and rap are pretty okay right now imo

tEddixS-UoU‎

u-2ckLBV21g

[Psycho P and the Freight Train]

#FF0000, ok THAT was what I was trying to say. I guess I should have specified I was referring to rock. That's what I meant. There is always some kind of revolutionary new rock music on the radio every decade, but not anymore for some reason. The "kids these days" aren't gushing over new rock albums, and that's what concerns me.

Communer, that is…. extremely accurate actually. I never thought about it like that but you're absolutely right.

[#FF0000]

However, we've sorta hit a watershed moment where nowadays, anyone can quickly pirate FrootyLoops or become the next Disney™ music product (all rights reserved).

Yeah -- it's easier to become a musician and do your thing than it was before, and the industry is even better at producing pop idols.


Lower levels of comprehension regarding musical theory combined with music aimed at the lowest common denominator of listening (see: everything is in 4/4 using the same chord progressions, easy keys, and around the same BPM).

I dunno I feel like this started off as a pretty good take on the things that are going on now and then suddenly dropped off into a kinda condescending rockist diatribe here. I'd say musicians "then" (dad-rock era of the 60's and 70's) had about as much knowledge of music as artists do today. Wouldn't be surprised if artists today have more knowledge of these things, tbh.

I mean, now that I think of it, most kids I knew who made beats on frootyloops had more working knowledge of music theory than the rockist kids who spent 2k on a Gibson SG and acted like their dad's record collection was the pinnacle of culture.

[#FF0000]

#FF0000, ok THAT was what I was trying to say. I guess I should have specified I was referring to rock. That's what I meant. There is always some kind of revolutionary new rock music on the radio every decade, but not anymore for some reason. The "kids these days" aren't gushing over new rock albums, and that's what concerns me

Yeah. And I don't think the problem is "kids these days". Popular rock music for the past couple decades has been laughably bad. Post-grunge and nu-metal all day every day for twenty years.

[Anglo-Saxon Philistine]

I just spent the better part of six hours hunting for a bug in my code. Turns out I used "xi", when I wanted to say "xxi", which is another variable because the person whose code I based mine on was a big silly. I am also wondering where my life went wrong, if I could perhaps sacrifice my firstborn son to the gods to get another chance at life, or at least redo college, if adopted children count, and whether I should just sod off and become a trucker.

[#FF0000]

listening to dinosaur jr and wondering where lead guitars went

[Sinister Intents]

This is great death metal from 2008
syldZ2zr_8c

[Ele'ill]

rage against the machine was pretty neat

[Sinister Intents]

rage against the machine was pretty neat

Indeed, did you like SoaD?

[Ele'ill]

dunno what that is

[Sinister Intents]

System of a Down

[Ele'ill]

a few of their songs are catchy I guess and I liked some folks who listened to them regularly

[Sinister Intents]

Indeed, I no longer listen to SoaD, I grew out of them

[Ele'ill]

<3 putting on melt banana at work on shitty stereo speakers whenever i'm unhappy

[consuming negativity]

Yeah -- it's easier to become a musician and do your thing than it was before, and the industry is even better at producing pop idols.



I dunno I feel like this started off as a pretty good take on the things that are going on now and then suddenly dropped off into a kinda condescending rockist diatribe here. I'd say musicians "then" (dad-rock era of the 60's and 70's) had about as much knowledge of music as artists do today. Wouldn't be surprised if artists today have more knowledge of these things, tbh.

I mean, now that I think of it, most kids I knew who made beats on frootyloops had more working knowledge of music theory than the rockist kids who spent 2k on a Gibson SG and acted like their dad's record collection was the pinnacle of culture.

Well it depends a lot on what music we're talking about. The problem with classifying music eras starting in about 1880-1920 thereabout is that music became increasingly more diverse between the "genres". In the traditional orchestra, you had impressionism and expressionism going on, which were polar opposites of each other but keeping the same instrumentation. Around that time was the rise of the Big Bands, which started off by giving us people like Duke Ellington or Benny Goodman, and eventually culminated in such musical masterminds as John Coltrane and Miles Davis, who to me represent the pinnacle of technical and theoretical achievement.

Later on, music started more and more becoming an industry and that's when we start seeing the popular music shift towards spoon-fed music with artists like Frank Sinatra who were famous for singing other people's music. After WWII up until the 60s, music was split between white people easy-listening pop and stuff like Motown (ie. the Temptations), with orchestral instrumentation all but dead at that point. In the 60s we started getting some amazing bands again in the whole Woodstock crowd; bands such as Pink Floyd were definitely corporate but at the same time were still very much innovative.

It was after all of that died down that during the 70s through 90s we pretty much saw intellectual pop rock music die a slow death, at least from a musical standpoint, with Nirvana and grunge basically serving as a death knell for the "rockists". Punk, of course, took this to the extreme by placing a lot less emphasis on musicality and more on lyrics and the whole counter-culture bit, where the music was almost secondary to itself. And of course there were other break-offs from pop, with the beginning of good rap music, metal, electronic music, and everything else that diversified into what we have today. Some of it is great, and some of it is shit. More important than genre in our world is whether or not something is "pop" music within whatever genre; pop country, pop rock, pop electronic, all sorta have melded into this weird trans-pop genre with every radio station playing the same sorts of song sets as to what new music is. And yet they're only scraping the tip of the tip of the iceberg as to what's out there; it's just that now, more than ever, you have to dig deeper to find the interesting, intellectually-stimulating music.

[Ele'ill]

dandelion junk queens

[Sinister Intents]

There is someone in Maine I have to hang out with. There are people in Washington and Oregon I need to hang out with as well

[Ele'ill]

oh ya?

[Sinister Intents]

Dah tovarish!

[Os Cangaceiros]

Some cop rang my door bell a few days ago. I have no idea what it was about, but I didn't answer my door. Most of the time when the police are at my door and I know that it's them, I won't answer. I don't like talking to them so I don't, but I still am wondering what they were at my door about...I've been hanging out with a lot of "sketchy people" lately & this is a "bad neighborhood" but I'm not really a criminal (not in the true sense of the word anyway, as in someone who makes their money through illegal activities).

They've harassed me in the past for weird stuff too...one time I heard a car slinking around in the parking lot of my apartment block, and I peered out my blinds and noticed it was a cop car. The car immediately stopped as soon as I looked outside, and moments later I heard a loud knock on my door. I didn't answer it and eventually the knocking stopped and the car pulled away. That happened a few months ago and I'm still wondering what that was all about...I wasn't doing anything wrong at the time.

Goddamn po-po.

[Ele'ill]

doesn't the not knowing eat your brain alive

[Ele'ill]

also wait you have a fucking doorbell holy shit

[Os Cangaceiros]

Yeah, my apartment has a doorbell. Most people don't use it, though, most people just knock on my door.

[Os Cangaceiros]

Also, amusingly my apartment door frame is all scarred up around where the doorknob and deadbolt are, from the last time the door was kicked in haha. There's just enough space in between the door and the frame that you can see who's in the hallway. Always reminds me of "Fight Club" whenever I notice it.

[Ele'ill]

unrelated- how long before you or I walk out our front door and see something horrifying and strange in the night sky, a cosmic event that we can't place from memory, beautiful but unsettling, that nobody knows anything about

[#FF0000]

unrelated- how long before you or I walk out our front door and see something horrifying and strange in the night sky, a cosmic event that we can't place from memory, beautiful but unsettling, that nobody knows anything about

tw: horrors from beyond, the unknowable, etc

https://31.media.tumblr.com/426b3238a326516e13e4abcdb1a8fba2/tumblr_n4r4albFwV1rv0p43o1_1280.jpg

[Ele'ill]

was reading about the death of the sun and wondering why this person at work works so hard and goes to school but smokes a lot of cigarettes I know why cause I did the same but yeah the sun is going to die and turn the earth into nothing so none of this matters however we are then all unique snow flakes because in the infinite stretch that is time all that time is once and then that's it isn't it amazing to be anything at all etc..

[Ele'ill]

like the meteor in russia

http://37.media.tumblr.com/4019e2102b5ea4c2140f4da3b6316b85/tumblr_mi9w15yDMU1qebadgo1_500.gif

[BIXX]

like the meteor in russia

http://37.media.tumblr.com/4019e2102b5ea4c2140f4da3b6316b85/tumblr_mi9w15yDMU1qebadgo1_500.gif


I'm stoned so that just destroyed my brain.

But thank you that was really cool.

[A Revolutionary Tool]

There's this lady at work who is such a snitch. She will go blab to the managers about anything it's so annoying. I hear her talking to the managers and it's always so and so did this wrong and that person did this. Then she brings up that I need to put expiration stickers on my products every time I change them out. Okay I will when I'm not too busy like I always do I told her. Today I get to work and the first thing the manager does is lecture me and yell about how important it is to always have expiration date stickers on at all times because we can get inspected and closed down for not having them on at any time. To add insult to injury I clock in and half the shit doesn't have expiration dates on them just like every day I get to work. Like yeah you're really going to yell at me and get angry about this thing that's so important to you that you let it slide everyday of your life. Shit, I know she's just taking her anger out on me because she can because she's my manager, that's the part that makes me the angriest.

[Rugged Collectivist]

Fuck errthang I don't even know anymore

dsalkfahsdl;gjasldgkjas'ldhfoawethwaohrw hgoewr

[Ceallach_the_Witch]

hungover

shouldn't really have gone out last night since I can't really afford to take time out BUT it was my favourite pub's last day open and i'd be damned if I didn't go

that said I feel like i'm dying, going to someone's house to further drown my sorrows was maybe not a good idea.

[Domela Nieuwenhuis]

Monday...

[Anglo-Saxon Philistine]

So after something like three weeks, and dozens of nights with little to no sleep, I finally figured out that my results were all rubbish because I screwed up the units in one particularly inconsequential part of the program. So I fixed that and rushed to the university first thing this morning.

"Oh, professor P. is on a trip and won't be back for a week."

*sound of sanity shattering*

[Sinister Intents]

We could all die so easily.

[Ceallach_the_Witch]

Monday...

it's a bank holiday here, thankfully - not like i'll be making use of it but w/e

[Rosa Partizan]

Vincent wrote me some PMs in Croatian, and it's all fine, I was kinda successful in pretending that I'm able to understand and write Croatian. However, I gotta admit that I have no fucking clue what his last PM is about without looking up like 3 words every other line. Dude, you're too smart for me, stop making me feel like an idiot :laugh:

work sucked today, one of my contact lenses became as dry as the Gobi Desert, and my boss was like, what happened, did you cry, is it because of colleague xy (that hot IT guy who's in a relationship, but certainly into me, I mean, who would not be :rolleyes:) and I was like --> :laugh: and then :crying: because of that fucking lens. I took it out and all of a sudden was almost blind with the right eye while I could see everything clearly with that left one. That fucked my brain and I went home.

At the station, some older man gave me a cookie when he saw my reddish eyes and was like "everything's goona be okay, men come and go". Instead of telling him that it's my lens, I was like thank you and ate the cookie, I mean, c'mon, a free cookie!

[human strike]

I am soooo tired. Too much drugs and not enough food and sleep in my life last few days. Got all this shit to do for the jobcentre today. :(


it's a bank holiday here, thankfully - not like i'll be making use of it but w/e

When you're unemployed bank holidays suck. :glare:

[Crabbensmasher]

There's this woman at work that sounds like Kitty from That 70s Show. She even laughs like her. Well, either that, or she's doing a really terrible, over-the-top impersonation of Sarah Palin. It's like a cross between the two I guess.

Anyway, it's really terrible, and most times I'll pretend not to have heard her when she talks to me. I've done that to other people at work and I think they notice. Most people probably think I'm weird/don't like me at all. That's fine, I don't like them either.

For the record, this is really uncharacteristic of me. I guess we kind of put on different faces at different places. Luckily, work stays at work. When I go home I'm fine for the most part

[Rosa Partizan]

There's this woman at work that sounds like Kitty from That 70s Show. She even laughs like her. Well, either that, or she's doing a really terrible, over-the-top impersonation of Sarah Palin. It's like a cross between the two I guess.

Anyway, it's really terrible, and most times I'll pretend not to have heard her when she talks to me. I've done that to other people at work and I think they notice. Most people probably think I'm weird/don't like me at all. That's fine, I don't like them either.

For the record, this is really uncharacteristic of me. I guess we kind of put on different faces at different places. Luckily, work stays at work. When I go home I'm fine for the most part

hahahaha that's awesome, should try that with some colleagues of mine, too. Does it work, do people talk less to you?

[A Revolutionary Tool]

I have this coworker who laughs whenever she asks people to do things it's freakin weird and I've just come to the conclusion she finds enjoyment in telling people what to do. "ART, could you drop more fries" *laughs*. Uh yeah okay just stop laughing at me please.

[Sinister Intents]

Rage.

[Quail]

Ugh... I'm feeling pretty ill today. Headachy and stomach-crampy and fuck, I just made myself a cup of tea and forgot about it.

[The Intransigent Faction]

Slept for about an hour last night and just got home...

I'm in that awkward state of "awake enough to want to philosophize and discuss shit" and "not awake enough to be, or to care enough to be, coherent".

I should stop pulling that same stunt every week, but I know I won't.

[Os Cangaceiros]

Monday...

Everyday is Saturday when you're an unemployed bum like myself.

Gotta go back to work soon, though. :crying:

[Anglo-Saxon Philistine]

Vincent wrote me some PMs in Croatian, and it's all fine, I was kinda successful in pretending that I'm able to understand and write Croatian.

I've been doing that for most of my life.

I don't think anyone is fooled, though.


However, I gotta admit that I have no fucking clue what his last PM is about without looking up like 3 words every other line. Dude, you're too smart for me, stop making me feel like an idiot :laugh:

I think it's more a question of my style being horrifyingly stilted and formal, in BCMS more so than in English (although, as this post demonstrates, my English goes to hell as well when I'm tired). I don't even recall what the PM was about - I forgot to save a copy in the "sent items" folder, go me - I think I mentioned the old Feral Tribune newspaper and so on.


work sucked today, one of my contact lenses became as dry as the Gobi Desert, and my boss was like, what happened, did you cry, is it because of colleague xy (that hot IT guy who's in a relationship, but certainly into me, I mean, who would not be :rolleyes:) and I was like --> :laugh: and then :crying: because of that fucking lens. I took it out and all of a sudden was almost blind with the right eye while I could see everything clearly with that left one. That fucked my brain and I went home.

At the station, some older man gave me a cookie when he saw my reddish eyes and was like "everything's goona be okay, men come and go". Instead of telling him that it's my lens, I was like thank you and ate the cookie, I mean, c'mon, a free cookie!

Ha, well, at least you can wear contact lenses - I tried to do that once and I couldn't stop crying, it was embarrassing. So I go through life with two slabs of plastic in front of my face most of the day, pressing down on my nose.

[Ele'ill]

Monday, not pay week.

[Sinister Intents]

I hate mondays

[Crabbensmasher]

hahahaha that's awesome, should try that with some colleagues of mine, too. Does it work, do people talk less to you?

Oh yes. The great part is that I'm new to the job, so they just assume I have a grumpy/bitter personality in general. Couldn't work better.

Also, today, my commute home was an hour and a half, due to patchy bus coverage in my city. Talked to some older ladies waiting at the bus stop though, and it turned out to be aight. They were nice. I always find it way easier to talk to people aged 40+ for some reason. I was also talking to the maintenance guy at work for awhile. (Oh, I'm a social butterfly - just not to my coworkers)

Most people my age kind of avoid conversations by gluing themselves to their cellphones or whatever. A lot of people generalize by saying we're 'less friendly' or 'antisocial' but that's probably wrong. I think we're just as social, but we're just stuck in a really isolated climate. It's the mentality of 'I would talk to more people if it was normal to do so' which it's not. I just mean little conversations on the street, small talk or whatever. Nobody does that anymore. I think they want to, but it's not being validated to them because nobody else does it. It's a vicious cycle.

[TheGodlessUtopian]

Next semester I am going to try and be more social. I did try to be social this semester but it backfired... because I am I. But next semester I will try harder. Regardless, I think I will try and start some kind of intellectual literary group next semester; something which caters to those who want to push literary theory forward. Don't know how well that will go over with the kind of students here but you never know; we all have our pipe dreams.

[Domela Nieuwenhuis]

How much wood does a woodchuck chuck?


Also: being thrown around between anger and sadness is pretty irritating.

[Ceallach_the_Witch]

miserable panicky writing and reading before a great big nasty deadline has the same affect on the human body as spending an entire week on the lash - or at least it feels like that. I feel fucking awful.

[Quail]

Changed my name back to Quail because it feels wrong logging in as anything else!

[Futility Personified]

I gotta admit, there's something nice and familiar about Quail being Quail!



Got a letter saying the dole office suspects my dedication to finding work today.
Rant therein.

On friday I begged like a fucking dog to keep my meager £112 a week. I didn't have my sheets but I showed them my emails so they knew what I was applying for etc. I've been on their books for 6 months, so this letter isn't exactly unexpected but the ominous tones that're now injected into my life are not wanted. I've applied for pretty much anything, put myself onto agency books for anything that I can do, have to abase myself every 2 weeks because half of the fucking listings they put up I know are fake. This, in conjunction with the news that people on JSA will be obliged to apply for zero hour contracts really puts the fear in me. Working for a fast food retail place was my idea of hell. Anxiety jittering me all over the place, dealing with entitled wankstains who seem to think that because they are ordering some doss mass produced food that I am to make their every banal pain in the arse mundane wish vis a vie shitty food wish come true.... not to mention the fucking bosses.

I fucking despise them. I have made no secret of my hatred of where I live, i'll admit that sober, when I end up having a skinful i'll wax lyrical (and occasionally freestyle... whoops!) how much I fucking hate this place. The job center people know this, know about my anxiety etc, see all the jobs I apply for.

Because i've applied for so many things, i've started applying for any old shit now to pad my applications out. Being the honest halfwit I am, I told the complete shitbreak this. He has a go, tries calling me out and says the 5 jobs a week are only guidelines to be applied for. The lying fuck. I know people who've had that as a pretext to have their benefit removed before.

I know a revolution is far-fetched and a fanciful daydream at present, but where is OUR side of the class warfare? Where's the mass response to the great shafting of the workers and the poor? Has the X-Factor mindset and the racist mentality behind UKIP disarmed the working class entirely?

I'm not doomed. One major lesson i've learnt in life is that when your expectations of what is to happen are bisected, things are never as bad as they seemed in your head. But the idea that my life will get more difficult in the near future is something that really gets my back up.

And if I hear one more mug tell me about how they're voting UKIP, say something racist, diss people on the dole.... well, I won't do anything aside from stew and froth at the mouth.

I'm not drinking for a month, because it's making me nihilistic being in this shithole town. Picked the wrong fucking time to do it!

[Igor]

textured soy protein pasta and some ketchup

how did poor people survive before invention of this gourmet dish eludes me

[Igor]

today im going de luxe as FUCK with a side of pickles

[Sinister Intents]

Work went too fast today, and now I'm gonna he stuck in a car for a few hours

[human strike]

How am I meant to pretend to use Universal Jobmatch if I can't log in to it? Fucking fuck the fucking jobcentre!

[Rosa Partizan]

burn that shit down, that solves like everything.

[Igor]

never encountered a problem that cant be answered with an act of revolutionary arson

[human strike]

It's something I've been fantasising about for a long time.

[Quail]

A joke logo I designed a while back...
https://scontent-b-lhr.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-frc3/t1.0-9/379479_10150953441205562_444304229_n.jpg

[Sinister Intents]

Yes!!!

[Quail]

Maybe I'm just lucky to have small boobs but oddly enough I find it more comfortable (physically as well as mentally) wearing a binder than a bra. Maybe I need to get measured for bras again, but I only wear them for Judo so I don't know if there is much point.

[consuming negativity]

Changed my name back to Quail because it feels wrong logging in as anything else!

As amusing as Miss Andrist was, I was still thinking of you as "Quail" the entire time.

[#FF0000]

The Sads are striking here at home now too. Always felt distant haze of Deep Sad, and it only got intense sometimes at work, but now the low droning of time passing too slowly and too quickly at the same time is always in my ears :mellow:

[Ceallach_the_Witch]

re: my last post

sometimes it's bad enough for you that you have a petit-breakdown, miss the deadline question mark question mark crying.

E:

1/10 experience not recommended would not buy again

[Quail]

My son is being such a nightmare tonight, think he needs an early night...

[Crabbensmasher]

Somebody just texted me the word 'Shweet' in a sentence.

What the fuck is a shweet.

Don't shweet me.

[The Intransigent Faction]

Once again temporarily throwing up my hands in my job search today.
Ah well...tomorrow. :o

[Rosa Partizan]

I got some little online crush on communer, gotta admit it.

[Quail]

Made an OKCupid profile in the hope of finding friends/interesting people to talk to. Do people use dating sites for that? Oh, and to mindlessly answer stupid questions out of boredom/procrastination. I swear half of the match questions are just paraphrases of, "Are you a massive misogynist/racist?"

[Sinister Intents]

Whatever Singularity said OKCupid was good. I deleted my account because no one visited my page anymore, and no one ever returned any messages to me accept Abbie, but she stopped talking to me. It doesn't work in my area

[Crabbensmasher]

I'm pretty sour because apparently I don't like videogames anymore. They just don't hold my interest at all. I'll get to the loading screen and have no motivation to get into a game.

So, now what do I do with my free time? Sitting around listening to music is nice, but I always feel that it's 'wasted' free time. Like, I only have so much of it before I have to work again, I should be doing something fun.

[Rosa Partizan]

what about reading?

[Crabbensmasher]

Mhhm, I wanted to read 'a scanner darkly'.

Also wanted to read some Nietzsche and Kropotkin, and maybe some Proudhon. I was reading a lot during the school year though, and I wouldn't classify these as 'leisure activities' at all.

I've just been hanging out with friends a lot to fill in the free time. It's nice, but I still kind of want to start some sort of project. It's like the videogames though. I'll get to the loading screen, and suddenly not have enough motivation to continue.

I've even done some writing. I'll do a couple paragraphs and be like 'Well that was awesome, now time to move on to something else before I start spewing out shit'.

[slum]

i read very little of my 'leisure' material since i'm often sick to death of staring at a book or screen all day; i fucking love books on tape, though. librivox.org has a vast collection of free open-source audio books (including Nietzsche and Kropotkin). the only downside is not being able to take marginal notes.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Since my slip up on quitting smoking last week this is take two. Anyone wants a double dose of irritability, a triple dose of psycho and a triple dose of rage, come near me.
... This is really an if you dare situation...

Serious anger for no reason!

[#FF0000]

I strongly dislike when I run into people who share my interests but who also front as if they are a font of knowledge about whatever it happens to be (movies, music, video games, books, whatever). Especially when they lord it over other people while really not being as well-versed in the subject as they think they are.

Like yo if you're going to be a music snob you should know a lil about music beyond what you glean from popular music discussion sites geez

[#FF0000]

woah woah woah woah i've been listening to a lot of Nation of Ulysses n The Make Up lately and just looked up Ian Svenonius for some reason and the Washington Post just published a thing about him one hour ago woah woah woah wow

[Sinister Intents]

Tired, thirsty, and hungry

[#FF0000]

(◕‿◕✿)

[Comrade Jacob]

Dyed me hair again, got some dye on my face and had to violently rub it off and now it has an awful semi-permanent Chinese-burn on my face, cos fuck logic.

[Bala Perdida]

Bus driver had to act like an asshole. There where people running that got like 10ft close to the bus and he still took off! Most bus drivers I've met around here are cool. What the fuck!

[human strike]

Made an OKCupid profile in the hope of finding friends/interesting people to talk to. Do people use dating sites for that? Oh, and to mindlessly answer stupid questions out of boredom/procrastination. I swear half of the match questions are just paraphrases of, "Are you a massive misogynist/racist?"

People do use it for that, though not primarily of course. The questions are very addictive. The whole thing is very addictive actually, it's very fun to people watch through. It can be very fun and additive to meet people from too. I've a friend who had 15 first dates from OKCupid in less than two months. I've met two people from it, am still seeing both of them. Well, I say "seeing", but lately I never get to see them. :(

[Sinister Intents]

I wish OKCupid worked for me WS :(

[human strike]

Well, generally cis women looking for men get bombarded with messages and it's difficult for anyone else. The down side is they also get lots of creepy unwanted attention too.

Sick of seeing UKIP billboards everywhere. It's nice so many have been subverted - and some very well - but not enough.

[Rosa Partizan]

Well, generally cis women looking for men get bombarded with messages and it's difficult for anyone else. The down side is they also get lots of creepy unwanted attention too.

Sick of seeing UKIP billboards everywhere. It's nice so many have been subverted - and some very well - but not enough.

Yes. This is why I wrote a ton of, you know, feisty stuff about me, like, being a feminist, vegan, having a far left attitude and stuff, all these things most people find annoying or exhausting, but still, guys write me PMs like "hello, nice pics :)". yeah, that's why I wrote some essay about me - so that I get a one liner for my pics. Makes perfect sense. Douchebags everywhere.

[consuming negativity]

Sometimes I forget that reality is supposed to be real, and that people actually have beliefs and emotions that matter to them. I forget that thinking is predicated on a world that actually exists, and that our continued failure means immeasurable death and suffering to people we will never know existed.

This piece of cake I'm eating tastes like cheap bourbon.

It isn't that I don't recognize that I'm alive, it's that I feel so divorced from emotion that I feel like I'm outside of my body. One day I won't be alive, but when that day comes, I won't even be able to tell myself.

I can click a button right now and share this mild dissociative episode with dozens of people who don't care and probably think I'm high as fuck. I wish they were right, but my weirdest posts are always when I'm sober and clear-headed. Probably because when you're intoxicated you don't have the mental capacity to analyze things to the degree required to disprove your own existence.

...

what?

Where the fuck did all my cake go? I can't believe I just ate that huge slice so quickly.

Holy shit I probably sound like I belong in an asylum somewhere. What if I do and nobody bothered to tell me all these years? I wouldn't put it past them. Assholes.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I wish OKCupid worked for me WS :(

I never had a profile on a dating site. So I don't know what it's like but I figured it seemed silly to me and like something that would end up with me more annoyed than anything out.

[Domela Nieuwenhuis]

Some music is awesome when the sun is burning, but it sucks when it's raining. Fuck rain.

[#FF0000]

greasy unhealthy food therapy session featuring a big ol greasy paper bag full of burgers

MxVdU2eVYSgrM_tDB8OZok

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Some times I like to talk like I'm a badlipreading and make no sense whatsoever. I love the badlipreadings where it sounds like it would be offensive if it were coherent enough to have an offensive message but alas it is really random words thrown together to Ron Paul's lip movements.

[Futility Personified]

If you can put skysports news on, turn it down, and then play some cheesy pop music you can have some hilarious results. Some middle aged man who looks like he gets wheeled out of a cupboard when his broadcast time is on singing about his milkshake bringing all the boys to the yard in perfect lip synch is gloriously life affirming.

[Quail]

Well, generally cis women looking for men get bombarded with messages and it's difficult for anyone else. The down side is they also get lots of creepy unwanted attention too.

I've set mine up so that straight guys can't see me to avoid that very issue. Already have a bunch of straight male friends anyway.

[Hrafn]

I recently registered to a Swedish site primarily geared towards the lgbt community, but also partially straights. I, a cis-male guy with no pics uploaded, am now drowning in messages from guys my age and older men alike, all looking for one thing. First time that has ever happened.

[Rugged Collectivist]

I've only slept a few hours in the past two days. I'm pretty tired but I can't sleep yet as I still have stuff to do. I think the lack of sleep is making me more paranoid than usual. I've heard that sleep deprivation can have strange psychological effects up to and including hallucinations. I'm tempted to stay awake for several days to see what happens. I've never managed more than 24 hours. I believe the record is something like 14 days, but I doubt I can do that. Maybe I'll try to get 8 - 10 hours and start fresh so I can more accurately track my progress. It's not like I have anything better to do.


Some times I like to talk like I'm a badlipreading and make no sense whatsoever. I love the badlipreadings where it sounds like it would be offensive if it were coherent enough to have an offensive message but alas it is really random words thrown together to Ron Paul's lip movements.

"I'm gonna be leaving a watermelon pineapple treasure inside of Liam Neeson."

[Os Cangaceiros]

I've talked to some tweakers who've claimed to have stayed awake for 10+ days straight (and I believe them). You definitely start to see the "shadow people" when you get to that level

[Goblin]

How do i deactivate my account? Do i just send a pm to a mod/admin and ask them to do it? I've been thinking about deleting it. I haven't ceased to be a communist or anything, it's just that i never get on anymore so i just don't see a reason to keep my account.

[Rosa Partizan]

We got a client at the lawyer's office I work for. His wife died in a very tragic accident at the supermarket parking lot, some disabled man (saying this because it's relevant to his driving skills, he had some special car) literally squashed her with his car. The youngest kid, 5 months old, would've been dead, too, if it hadn't been in some very solid children's seat. She leaves 5 children, the oldest is about 6 or 7. Her husband...when he calls, he sounds totally different from what he sounded half a year ago. Just like...broken would be the right expression. His voice gives me the chills, it's incredible. As if this wasn't enough, he's fighting with her life insurance, he has ridiculously high costs for children's care now, her funeral, blah blah, and they don't wanna pay him out, goddamn.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

If you can put skysports news on, turn it down, and then play some cheesy pop music you can have some hilarious results. Some middle aged man who looks like he gets wheeled out of a cupboard when his broadcast time is on singing about his milkshake bringing all the boys to the yard in perfect lip synch is gloriously life affirming.

I've never heard of skysports news, is that something from across the pond?

[Quail]

I really need to stop dressing like a black bloc'er in my daily life.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I really need to stop dressing like a black bloc'er in my daily life.

I feel you, I dress like tank girl had been fused with a crusty anarchist street kid. But I untied my skank from my neck last night due to a heat rash.

[Futility Personified]

I've never heard of skysports news, is that something from across the pond?

Top marks for using a super english phrase. It's the sports version of our version of Fox (or at least sky is owned by Rupert Murdoch).

[#FF0000]

jesus talking about national politics is boring as heck.

[Rosa Partizan]

I wanna eat ALL THE TIME wtf is this. And I def can't be pregnant. Getting some pasta with pesto now.

[motion denied]

I had a dream with Toni Negri; dude was trying to convince me of all sorts of stuff.

Also, I turned on the shower and forgot to take it.

I'm pretty sure I'm losing it. Or just tired.

[#FF0000]

I wanna eat ALL THE TIME wtf is this. And I def can't be pregnant. Getting some pasta with pesto now.

Might be stress from work. I know once things started getting really rough at my last job I was spending the whole week thinking/talking/dreaming about the food I was going to eat that weekend.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Top marks for using a super english phrase. It's the sports version of our version of Fox (or at least sky is owned by Rupert Murdoch).

Not sure what top marks means but I am guessing it is like saying props. I think I heard the term across the pond from a british person in the United States who I talked to once and it just kinda stuck. Although I do remember my ex from Michigan telling one of my friends from my home state of Wisconsin that he was from the other side of the pond in reference to lake Michigan. I try to pick up what I can from Europeans because it is kind of like getting the Europeans' better education second hand.

[Futility Personified]

Yup, props is a good equivalent. As sayings go I just find it funny that the huge atlantic ocean can be reduced to a home for frogs / dessicated cans of special brew. I've heard that European people on the continent have better education that we do in the UK, but when it comes to language? Just revel in it!

[#FF0000]

Literally about to make life changes so I can afford a $500 record cleaner because fuck the fact that my brand new records don't sound as good as this used one I got for 3 dollars in a torn up sleeve aaaaaaaaAAAAAAA

[Ceallach_the_Witch]

I've only slept a few hours in the past two days. I'm pretty tired but I can't sleep yet as I still have stuff to do. I think the lack of sleep is making me more paranoid than usual. I've heard that sleep deprivation can have strange psychological effects up to and including hallucinations. I'm tempted to stay awake for several days to see what happens. I've never managed more than 24 hours. I believe the record is something like 14 days, but I doubt I can do that. Maybe I'll try to get 8 - 10 hours and start fresh so I can more accurately track my progress. It's not like I have anything better to do.


earlier this week I got 3 hours of sleep over 4 days and whilst i wasn't exactly hallucinating i certainly wasn't in my right mind. I was fairly paranoid and anxious and if i wasn't careful my stream of thought would start losing intelligibility fast. I was pretty dehydrated and wired on caffiene too and i'd barely eaten from the stress in the last few days either so i was pretty much a wreck anyway.

[human strike]

Feeling lonely. Missing people. Sexually attracted to everybody..


I really need to stop dressing like a black bloc'er in my daily life.

Decided to dress like that today - want to do so more now. I don't wear enough black these days.

Going goth clubbing later. (Y)

[Anglo-Saxon Philistine]

My diet Pepsi tastes of sadness and failure.

[Rosa Partizan]

I have some real one, and some cake, you can come around anytime :wub:

[Ele'ill]

food is on my mind now, burritos

i wonder what a burrito smoothie would be like since burritos are almost already smoothies

[BIXX]

food is on my mind now, burritos

i wonder what a burrito smoothie would be like since burritos are almost already smoothies


Shit I'm really glad I didn't read this while high.

Hahahahahaha though seriously how did that thought even happen?

[motion denied]

Horribly bored.

[human strike]

Soooo speed, that's a thing. Don't you hate it when they close a club early but you dont wanna spend more money to get into somewhere else so you end up at home but youre still really buzzing? Hmmm.

Nothing is interesting enough.

[TheGodlessUtopian]

My diet Pepsi tastes of sadness and failure.

HEY! That is what my spiced rum tastes like; stop stealing my flavors!

- - - - -

I think a comedy show made by a Leftist chronicling the trials and tribulations of a university janitor would be amusing; when I think of all the things they do that would, from a leftist comedic angle make for great social commentary, I think the current media is so wasted on "middle class" occupations that great ideas are left to waste. So much material though: especially that one episode which the custodians meet Trotskyist students who try and organize them. So much potential... but I guess I will never get to see such a masterpiece.

[Rosa Partizan]

So I got this PM on okcupid. To explain beforehand: I got some feisty profile descriptions about myself, with all this feminist, far left stuff going on.

One guy wrote me (I'll translate to English, so it may not be 100% accurate):

Grow up and learn to be more tolerant. I don't have any issues with feminism or strong, intelligent women with a leftist attitude. But somehow you still haven't got the clue that very clever folks has a totally different attitude and still they can have good arguments...and Hemingway...oh please, this is stuff you read as a teenager. Have a nice day and you may believe that you're "better" than me.

Yeah, I'm most def better than this piece of shit :rolleyes:

[Anglo-Saxon Philistine]

So I got this PM on okcupid. To explain beforehand: I got some feisty profile descriptions about myself, with all this feminist, far left stuff going on.

One guy wrote me (I'll translate to English, so it may not be 100% accurate):

Grow up and learn to be more tolerant. I don't have any issues with feminism or strong, intelligent women with a leftist attitude. But somehow you still haven't got the clue that very clever folks has a totally different attitude and still they can have good arguments...and Hemingway...oh please, this is stuff you read as a teenager. Have a nice day and you may believe that you're "better" than me.

Yeah, I'm most def better than this piece of shit :rolleyes:

Arrange a date and have a go at his balls.

[Rosa Partizan]

yeah meeting him would be awesome. The only thing I would prefer to that would be chained to a car, naked, and being dragged over cow feces garnished with glass splinters.

[#FF0000]

brunch and mimosas with my mom (◕‿◕✿)

[human strike]

I got a message on OKCupid today too. We've been texting quite a lot throughout the day. Seems like they're exactly the kind of person I've been looking for (pretty much). :)

[Sinister Intents]

I started another OKC account. I'll fix it up better, but I expect the same results as previous.


I'm so fucking behind on my school work it's driving me insane

[consuming negativity]

OKCupidleft?

I didn't know people actually used those sites for legitimate purposes.

[Rosa Partizan]

OKCupidleft?

I didn't know people actually used those sites for legitimate purposes.

yeah, you won't anyway, since you got my PMs :p

[motion denied]

OKCupidleft?

I didn't know people actually used those sites for legitimate purposes.

If by legitimate purposes you mean world socialist revolution, I didn't know either.

[Rosa Partizan]

I got my account because I wanted to get over a certain guy by dating other guys. Didn't work out at all :laugh: :crying:

[human strike]

OKCupidleft?

I didn't know people actually used those sites for legitimate purposes.

https://www.facebook.com/OKComrade

[Ele'ill]

ostriches are scary and weird

[Ele'ill]

i don't know exactly what this is but there's a cheetah running down an ostrich (don't like ostriches/ostrich) and eating it and other stuff I watched it with the volume very low and am very confused

4kvev_A81NA

[Comrade Jacob]

My dad looks like Lenin.

[Quail]

I love this:
gdGdXVm4SN8

[Domela Nieuwenhuis]

how do i deactivate my account? Do i just send a pm to a mod/admin and ask them to do it? I've been thinking about deleting it. I haven't ceased to be a communist or anything, it's just that i never get on anymore so i just don't see a reason to keep my account.

noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!

[Domela Nieuwenhuis]

How are handshoes called handshoes? They're clearly handsocks!

[Rosa Partizan]

How are handshoes called handshoes? They're clearly handsocks!

nominated for cutest post in this thread.

[Sinister Intents]

Fourth Internationalist please never contact me again

[TheGodlessUtopian]

Surprise surprise!... my parents moved... again! Found out via my grandmother. Now they are in a new town. Kinda fucks up my plans for the summer; I was gonna hang out with my best friend and lounge occasionally with a professor who I discovered lived nearby but now that they have moved these things will be more complicated. I have to think more. Shit.

[The Jay]

My legs are so fucking sore and I am having bad hay fever. Damn you god!

[Sinister Intents]

I could really use a hug

[TheGodlessUtopian]

I could really use a hug

*super hug that makes the stars themselves explode (!)*

[Sinister Intents]

*super hug that makes the stars themselves explode (!)*

Thanks :wub: *Hugs back and the universe implodes on the awesomeness of the hug*

[TheGodlessUtopian]

We are hug masters; puts Ash Cathem to sham!!!! He couldn't even catch those fucking pokemon shit, but we did more than he ever could: make a human connection which doesn't have to do with forcing animals to battle each other!

[TheGodlessUtopian]

Well, I practically begged my crush-friend to meet with me so I could divulge some personal information; problem is, he is not available until sometime later tomorrow afternoon. So, in order to talk with him I will have to balance the amount of booze and caffeine I intake. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! *sigh*

[consuming negativity]

Being a biological organism is pretty cool but it definitely has its downsides. All in all, I'm not sure I'd recommend it to a friend. 3/5 stars

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Purple dye in my hair for the second night in a row because I ran out halfway done. Johnny Hobo on repeat and waiting for time to shower.

I talked to two of my exes on the phone tonight. One of them I'm still in love with. Cute tough redneck texan crusty hitch hiking train hopping tattoo'd scumfuck. I miss him and I love him but I know I'll just pull away again and break his heart for the 7th time. But I can't let myself do that to him, he deserves better than my commitment issues. I can't be the grrrl he deserves. I miss beating up misogynists with him by my side fighting along side me. I miss him and I doing tats on each other jailhouse style. He was the one man I have ever been in a relationship with who treated me right. I don't want him to suffer for me being a broken, lost and damaged grrrl with commitment issues. It's not fair to him.
:crying:

[human strike]

Being a biological organism is pretty cool but it definitely has its downsides. All in all, I'm not sure I'd recommend it to a friend. 3/5 stars

I really resent the fact that I have to eat. It's such a drag.

[TheGodlessUtopian]

It's spring and yet the university still has the heat going. Seriously. It is like ninety-give fucking degrees in my room.

[#FF0000]

Picked up a new game called Etrian Odyssey. Can't think of names so I'm naming everyone after friends. Thinking of going to the book n record store as well to TREAT MYSELF while I wait on callbacks. Gonna get the wheels turning on my maritime career tomorrow as well.

EDIT: lol checked my account lol no books/records today

[Rosa Partizan]

So I might actually use okcupid to meet up with someone for casual sex.

Lot of okcupid-postings here. Well, most of them by myself :laugh:

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

So I might actually use okcupid to meet up with someone for casual sex.

Lot of okcupid-postings here. Well, most of them by myself :laugh:

I'm still having a hard time understanding websites like okcupid and plentyoffish and all that stuff. I personally prefer crashing into someone completely by chance without expecting it. I have nothing against it I guess I prefer the spontaneity and surprise. I guess being my public intox ends up being my okcupid. I just wonder how that dating site concept ended up being so popular.

[Sea]

It's spring and yet the university still has the heat going. Seriously. It is like ninety-give fucking degrees in my room.sounds like the administration is..................................... cold-hearted

[human strike]

Oh god, I'm so anxious-preoccupied it's absurd. I can't stop thinking about relationships; it's really exhausting. I need distracting but I just wanna cancel anything else I might have to do in order to see people.

I'm also insanely horny. Last night, I swear, I woke up in the middle of the night masturbating. That's not normal, is it?

[Rosa Partizan]

hahaha it might be a bit...unusual...never had that and my sex drive is definitely above average.

[human strike]

I feel like about half of my dreams are sex dreams. Even when I'm depressed and my sex drive is dampened I still dream about sex lots.

I had a plan of what I wanted and how to manage my separation anxiety. This plan has come to fruition even better than I could have hoped, but I'm not dealing with things anywhere near as well as I'd hoped. I guess I should be glad that I'm doing so much better now than I was. Me three or four months ago would see these problems as good ones compared to what I was dealing with back then. Meh, that isn't actually all that much consolation, unsurprisingly...

[Brandon's Impotent Rage]

...Goddammit, why can't someone like Rosa or Bad Grrrl live somewhere near me!!! :crying:

[BIXX]

sounds like the administration is..................................... cold-hearted


Hahahaha I hate you oh my god.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Oh god, I'm so anxious-preoccupied it's absurd. I can't stop thinking about relationships; it's really exhausting. I need distracting but I just wanna cancel anything else I might have to do in order to see people.

I'm also insanely horny. Last night, I swear, I woke up in the middle of the night masturbating. That's not normal, is it?

I never experienced that and I have rather extreme fluctuation of sex drive between the very extreme low and the extreme high. I have never heard of anyone doing that. I've known of people doing all sorts of unusual sexual things from humping whatever (or in this case whoever) was near them (which was super annoying) in their sleep to fucking in parking structures and on random porches that they strolled upon. Okay, those last two were something I did.

But be thankful you don't do what I do in my sleep like throwing punches while asleep or waking up hold a knife as if you are holding it to an imaginary person's throat.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

...Goddammit, why can't someone like Rosa or Bad Grrrl live somewhere near me!!! :crying:

I don't live super far from Georgia.

[Crabbensmasher]

I feel like about half of my dreams are sex dreams. Even when I'm depressed and my sex drive is dampened I still dream about sex lots.



Hah, I'm afraid my sex drive has been flushed down the toilet. Last few times I did anything sexual I just ended up giggling or not taking it seriously at all. Like, I wanted to be excited, but for some reason I wasn't.

Either I've got some sort of hormone problem or there was a subconscious turn-off I was unaware of.

And since then it's been like 'Well you masturbate, but do you do it because you're horny or just because there's nothing better to do?' I really don't know teh answer

[consuming negativity]

Hah, I'm afraid my sex drive has been flushed down the toilet. Last few times I did anything sexual I just ended up giggling or not taking it seriously at all. Like, I wanted to be excited, but for some reason I wasn't.

Either I've got some sort of hormone problem or there was a subconscious turn-off I was unaware of.

And since then it's been like 'Well you masturbate, but do you do it because you're horny or just because there's nothing better to do?' I really don't know teh answer

That's like a chicken-or-the-egg thing, lol

[BIXX]

I started smoking cigarettes cause I wanted so badly to desire something uncontrollably. Didn't work. Sex and maturation- nothing. Friends... Kinda lost interest in them. I guess all I really wanna do is break shit all the time.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I started smoking cigarettes cause I wanted so badly to desire something uncontrollably. Didn't work. Sex and maturation- nothing. Friends... Kinda lost interest in them. I guess all I really wanna do is break shit all the time.

I'm working on quitting cigarettes. It has been about a week to a week and a half since I last slipped up. Be very glad you're not around me, I'm really b!tchy lately.

[BIXX]

I'm working on quitting cigarettes. It has been about a week to a week and a half since I last slipped up. Be very glad you're not around me, I'm really b!tchy lately.


I don't know, you seem cool. And I have a high tolerance for people who are in bad moods.

[Os Cangaceiros]

re: sex drive

One of the weirdest places that I consistently got aroused in was math class. It's weird, I wouldn't even be thinking about "sexy thoughts" when all of a sudden...yeah. I'd be thinking "Really? Math class?"

[Domela Nieuwenhuis]

What´s up with the | sign on your keyboard? Who ever uses that?

[Anglo-Saxon Philistine]

re: sex drive

One of the weirdest places that I consistently got aroused in was math class. It's weird, I wouldn't even be thinking about "sexy thoughts" when all of a sudden...yeah. I'd be thinking "Really? Math class?"

Must be all those curves.

I had the opposite problem. I remember thinking about S matrices in the middle of something and going completely flaccid. Those were the days.

[cyu]

OKCupidleft?

I didn't know people actually used those sites for legitimate purposes.


Growing the leftist army the old fashioned way ;)

[Rosa Partizan]

I must be conscious about how goddamn privileged I am in terms of mental and physical health and social and financial security. I tend to take things too often for granted, especially forgetting how many people would chop their leg off to live in a Western Europe country with all that social coverage.

[Leftsolidarity]

Once again I had another knife fighting dream. It's creepy how often I have those and how realistic they always feel. This time 2 guys tried to attack me through an open window of a car and I pulled some ninja shit disarming them immediately and took their knife and stabbed them with it before they ran away.

I don't know if I have this deep-seeded urge to stab things or what but these dreams always leave me feeling like a total badass in the morning.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

What´s up with the | sign on your keyboard? Who ever uses that?

I do

[Sea]

just took 200mg of caffeine, chewing nicotine gum, got a recently fed cat curled up next to me, gonna cut my hair normal despite wanting to leave it like this with it growing out so I can dye the ends in the back but have become increasingly more and more disquieted with/about myself and don't want to embrace any part of me I want to be not here. I am going to finish stick and poke and begin another. I am going to make vegan BLTs and drink beer though def. not in that order and probably not even BLT's probably just LT's, vegan lettuce and tomatoes and maybe just vegan lettuces with tons of vegan mayo and pepper, and watch many movies and probably stay up late reading or listening to musicBuy caffeine powder online. The pills are expensive as hell by comparison, and you'll be more awake with a lower amount (less jittery) if you insufflate it. Of course, it doesn't fix the problem of caffeine being a crappy stimulant anyway, but still.

[Os Cangaceiros]

I have this one individual on my mind. We used to hang out sometimes and have fun in the city I just left. Before I took off I called her and asked if she wanted to come over and have a smoke so I could see her one more time before I left. I wanted to tell her that I'd really miss her a lot, that she was one of only a couple friends I'd made up there & one of the only good things in a whole litany of messed up things that have bombarded my life recently, but I have a lot of difficulty expressing my emotions (I can rarely even tell my parents that I love them for god's sake), so all I was able to come up with was "I'll miss hanging out with you". We embraced, she left, I doubt I'll ever see her again honestly. The whole experience made me feel incredibly empty and depressed, like I have no friends and nothing of substantive meaning in my life...my parents are getting on in the years and when they're gone I'll truly be alone (as an only child) with nothing but failing health.

I was talking with someone recently about how my life had gone downhill, how in the spring semester I had started to drink more alcohol, got worse grades in school, stopped getting laid, drug use became less and less fun, etc, and this person replied that maybe I just got a bunch of stuff in my life upon moving there, and then moved on when it fulfilled it's purpose for me, and that I might want to move on to other things rather than dwelling on the decline. Maybe I should take that advice...some friends (probably most friends) are always meant to be time-and-place specific in your life, and I should probably just appreciate the (fragmented) memories and move on. I've met some really cool people in my life who I wish I was still in contact with, though. :(

[Crabbensmasher]

...some friends (probably most friends) are always meant to be time-and-place specific in your life, and I should probably just appreciate the (fragmented) memories and move on. I've met some really cool people in my life who I wish I was still in contact with, though. :(

Haha, I don't think my life is eventful enough to have time-and-place specific friends. (Not to put myself down or anything).

I just have friends - some stay, some come and go

[Os Cangaceiros]

You've probably had them...haven't you ever hung out with someone for a set period of time, had a blast and then never really saw or talked to that individual again?

There's been a bunch of people like that in my life.

[Os Cangaceiros]

One good example: one time I was riding the Long Island rail road when I was 17, I had a 40 oz bottle of Old E and the only other passenger (a Rastafarian dude with dreads) had a bottle of watermelon Smirnoff vodka, and we sat next to each other & polished off both bottles and had awesome conversations about life and all kinds of stuff. It all eventually degraded into me crawling down the middle aisle laughing hysterically as he continuously bellowed "WHERE THE WEED AT?!", but that was a real fun moment in time. Still remember his first name but never saw that guy again after that.

Time-and-place specific "friend" right there

[Sinister Intents]

I fucking hate online dating. Its so god fucking damn depressing to message people who I know will never fucking message me back. I just wanna fucking cut my fucking self. I'm obviously not interesting or I seem fucked up. I'm so fucking depressed

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I fucking hate online dating. Its so god fucking damn depressing to message people who I know will never fucking message me back. I just wanna fucking cut my fucking self. I'm obviously not interesting or I seem fucked up. I'm so fucking depressed

*hugs* I think you're mysterious. I see a lot of posts and I feel I don't know much about you, at all. You know what is interesting? I kinda want to know more, not in the same kind of way that you might get on a dating site but just in the "that person seems interesting I want to hear things they have to say" kind of way, even if the name Sinister Intents is actually a shockingly accurate description of about half the choices in my dating history.:laugh: I really do find you interesting. I deep-fried my short-term memory with drugs and blows to my head (more so the latter) so I might not remember stuff, though.

[consuming negativity]

Different sex replies by race:

http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/your-race-affects-whether-people-write-you-back/

Same sex replies by race:

http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/same-sex-data-race-reply/

Data is great. Also, lol white people.

[Dagoth Ur]

I'm a little too old, or maybe my area of the world is too backwards, to ever feel comfortable on dating sites. Plus I feel like it is the best way to meet the most superficial people ever.

[human strike]

It makes me uncomfortable when I'm in a discussion/meeting or whatever and someone says, "I don't hate men. It's not men who are the problem, it's society/patriarchy." Always feels like that lets men off the hook somehow. Sure, sexism is learned behaviour, but so is all behaviour. Surely the problem is both men and society?

[Sinister Intents]

I need a beer or some cider. I've both and I prefer the latter and today is a great day to get as drunk as possible. Depression hurts, but alcohol helps numb the pain even though its a shitty reason to drink... The plus is I've no obligations today to take care of.

[Sinister Intents]

I hate this fucking world. I have no fucking reason to be in it. Everything means nothing and existence is pointless. I wish the sun would fucking explode to kill us all. Life is hell.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I need a beer or some cider. I've both and I prefer the latter and today is a great day to get as drunk as possible. Depression hurts, but alcohol helps numb the pain even though its a shitty reason to drink... The plus is I've no obligations today to take care of.

Are you a cider drinker? (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbGb_iNcxdc)