Drug Test Help

[Geiseric]

Hey guys i'm a young comrade looking for advice on how to pass a drug screening for a job i'm trying to get. A lot is riding on this whole thing, so i'm sure myself as well as others would appreciate any information on how to pass a drug test while the person taking it has taken drugs, i'm sure marijuana is what most people would be worried about.

[Lily Briscoe]

When is the last time the person in question smoked weed? My understanding is that there isn't actually any way to 'cheat' a drug test, and all the supplements, cranberry juice regiments, etc. that are marketed for it are scams. Last time I had to get tested for a job, I'd smoked about a week and a half prior, and it came out clean. I exercised a lot and drank a lot of water (two things I do anyway, so that might have put me better off to begin with). Other than that, I'm not sure there's anything you can do...

[Os Cangaceiros]

It depends on the individual, to a large extent. Different people metabolize THC at different speeds. If you're a woman or an overweight man then chances are it'll remain in your system longer than if you're someone with a very low body fat percentage and a high metabolism.

It also depends on your rate of use. If you've been smoking every single day for months, then I'm sorry to say that it's going to remain in your system for quite some time, esp. if you're getting tested by law enforcement.

The sad fact is that there is no magic potion that'll remove the THC from a sample. Chugging water won't help, that'll just dilute the sample to the point of being untestable, which automatically fails you if you're on probation. THC gets to your bladder from being stored in your fat, there's no way to get it out of there except maybe by vigorous exercise.

The good news is that it's for a job, so there's probably no one who wants to stare at your penis like when you're on probation/parole for drug charges. Just fill a condom with borrowed clean urine and tape it to your leg or something.

[synthesis]

Hey guys i'm a young comrade looking for advice on how to pass a drug screening for a job i'm trying to get. A lot is riding on this whole thing, so i'm sure myself as well as others would appreciate any information on how to pass a drug test while the person taking it has taken drugs, i'm sure marijuana is what most people would be worried about.

I can't actually tell from this post alone if you're concerned about failing for marijuana or something else. Different drugs require very different solutions. With weed, you can drink a lot of water and cranberry juice (diuretic) because you can get rid of it by urinating, but with, say, opiates or benzodiazapines you'll have to eat a lot of fiber and take a lot of milk of magnesia because although it's present in your urine it won't help you get rid of it.

The really expensive cleanses can't hurt if you're pretty confident you'll get the job.

[The Garbage Disposal Unit]

Mhm.

THIS IS WHY YOU SHOULD ONLY USE LSD. NOBODY TESTS FOR LSD.

But, for real, drink water, exercise, and stop smoking for a few weeks.

[Geiseric]

Thanks guys, your input is much appreciated!