Love and Politics.

[RedGuevara]

Recently my interest in Marxism had rocketed. I'm reading voraciously. Asking questions and branching out to local groups. I'm happy.

Recently I was having a conversation with my girlfriend. She is an apolitical girl who sympathises with the feminist, vegan, anti war, and a few other movements. But she doesn't have the mind for politics. I got a little frustrated trying to ask her topic questions. But I do love her and she supports my endeavours in Communism.

My question to RL is to those with apolitical partners or spouses. How has being a Marxist affected your relationship? For me I used to be a little more conservative and now I understand my
girlfriends points of views on somethings but I have learned that we can't discuss heavy politics which is okay since her support means just as much to me.

[Hrafn]

Don't talk about it. Ever.

[RedGuevara]

Even if it's a big interest of mine?

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[Thirsty Crow]

=RedGuevara;2676171
Recently I was having a conversation with my girlfriend. She is an apolitical girl who sympathises with the feminist, vegan, anti war, and a few other movements. But she doesn't have the mind for politics. I got a little frustrated trying to ask her topic questions. But I do love her and she supports my endeavours in Communism.

And the problem would be...? Man love and mutual understanding and respect is all you need. Well, okay, sex is quite important too.

As for how it affected my relationships, it didn't. It's fun sometimes to discuss not "heavy" politics (you mean historical role play that passes for communism?), but the micro class politics and labor issues. That becomes possible once there is an existential basis for such experiences.

[RedGuevara]

Haha honestly I have severe Ocd and anxiety so I overanalyze EVERYTHING. Its a problem for me but I never doubted her love and you are right. Just curious toward others experience.

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[RedGuevara]

Also when I say heavy I m talking about Marxism. I tried to see if she had any interest in what I had read and her mind doesn't comprehend it as well. She's more of a theatre type. Yeah she's great and I try never to change her.

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[Eleutheromaniac]

Also when I say heavy I m talking about Marxism. I tried to see if she had any interest in what I had read and her mind doesn't comprehend it as well. She's more of a theatre type. Yeah she's great and I try never to change her.

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As long as you have other things to talk about, other things in common, I don't think it's a big deal and wouldn't worry.

[RedGuevara]

Yeah we do. Both gamers and love just being together. My fear resides in my Ocd. I also obsess about what ifs. Thank you La Pulga Atomica.

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[The Garbage Disposal Unit]

Alright, I'll do the mean part of my post first:

No offense, but I'm deeply skeptical of the dynamics at play when a dude says his girlfriend ["D]oesn't have the mind for politics." In fact, given that you spouted off a list of politics that she's sympathetic to, I'd probably go so far as to call bullshit.

My feeling is that, generally, when a "political" person has trouble discussing politics with an apolitical person, it usually says more about the discussion than it does about the politics. Like, what type of specialized vocabulary are you using? What assumptions are you approaching conversations with that might make taking politics with you a turn off? What nuances are there to the things she's saying that you're not hearing because they're framed in "apolitical" terms?

BUT!

If you love being together, and mutually support each other's projects, political and otherwise, politics "on paper" hardly matter. If she can trust you to look into and understand feminism, veganism, etc., and you can trust her take you seriously even when it doesn't necessarily interest her, then it will be fine.

[Quail]

Moved this thread to Non-Political.

I don't think politics are the be all and end all of a relationship, as long as you have similar values and goals in life.

[TheGodlessUtopian]

I think I would have a hard time living with a bourgeois apologist though. I mean, yes, politics aren't everything and I am not going to turn down a great guy simply because he is not a revolutionary, but at the same time I do not think I could make it with someone who spouts off how awesome the Democrats are or supports various other nonsense like American Exceptionalism, militarism, etc. A balancing act to be sure and a detriment to building healthy relationships, perhaps; but, one that (for me personally) is something which weighs heavily on my mind.

[Quail]

Well yeah, that's why I said "share similar values" - I'd have a hard time being in a serious relationship with someone who was, say, a tory. A lot of right wing viewpoints lack any kind of empathy and compassion and that is incredibly unattractive.

[TheGodlessUtopian]

Oh, I interpreted values in a more moralist sense instead of the intended political sense.

[RedGuevara]

Sorry if the comment came out sexist. Let me rephrase. She doesn't have an interest in politics in the activist sense. She's capable of understanding Marxism. Sorry.

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[RedGuevara]

I wasn't inasmuch reflecting on us as just trying to ask others their experiences haha. But I thank everyone for replying.

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[RedGuevara]

I wasn't as much reflecting on us as just trying to ask others their experiences haha. But I thank everyone for replying.

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That's my way of saying thanks for posting. The different view points I like to hear because it broaden my experiences in life. Helps keep me open minded and thinking. Always learning.


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[Thirsty Crow]

Well yeah, that's why I said "share similar values" - I'd have a hard time being in a serious relationship with someone who was, say, a tory. A lot of right wing viewpoints lack any kind of empathy and compassion and that is incredibly unattractive.
Well yeah, this is actually true in my case as well. So, a part of politics, that mushy underlying "values" part, is actually necessary.

[human strike]

If you think having a partner with different politics is hard, try organising with your partner. lol

[Vladimir Innit Lenin]

dude, most people aren't ever going to be activists. Probably just as well, it's a quick road to frustration and self-importance.

You don't need to share that to be in love though. Surely you don't fall in love with someone for their activism skills (well, you might, but it's unlikely to be the main point of attraction). Whatever about them makes you fall in love, that's all that matters - that and if they make you happy, and if as you say they share similar politics anyway, then it doesn't matter if they're out on the barricades every time with you. If they support you and you them, then I reckon that's great, probably a lot better than most.

[Jimmie Higgins]

Recently my interest in Marxism had rocketed. I'm reading voraciously. Asking questions and branching out to local groups. I'm happy.

Recently I was having a conversation with my girlfriend. She is an apolitical girl who sympathises with the feminist, vegan, anti war, and a few other movements. But she doesn't have the mind for politics. I got a little frustrated trying to ask her topic questions. But I do love her and she supports my endeavours in Communism.

My question to RL is to those with apolitical partners or spouses. How has being a Marxist affected your relationship? For me I used to be a little more conservative and now I understand my
girlfriends points of views on somethings but I have learned that we can't discuss heavy politics which is okay since her support means just as much to me.

The only tension my politics have caused in my relationship of many years has to due with balancing time commitments. There's pleanty of political overlap and we talk politics all the time, but it's not like I'm trying to win political points or win arguments or anything; we agree and disagree about many other things too, like movies or whatnot.

Maybe the movie comparison is a little glib, it's apples and organges actually andmy partner did have to wrap her head around what being a revolutionary meant and that politics aren't just shooting the shit over a beer. But there obviously has to be a level of trust and sympathy towards me and my politics... I mean if you tell someone you're a revolutionary, they will be able to deal with that or not... if they are secretly thinking "it's a phase", or "I can convince them to change their views" then it will cause probablems but there would likely be trust and respect problems anyway if people are approaching eachother like that.