Log in

View Full Version : An original commieboy story



commieboy
8th January 2004, 23:14
I had an assignmen due tomorrow, a narritive about a significant event in your life sad, happy anything so this is the product of twenty minutes last night at one in the morning.... enjoy...

Just Another Ripple in the Water

As the young man sits in the family car speeding down the Michigan highway he looks to his best friend, who lies in his lap inside a Folgers coffee can. The small turtle the size of a hockey puck sat in wonder of where he’d be as they traveled further north. A lot of emotions were in the car that day, never in his life had the young man had to give up a pet before, and especially not one as important as this. But finally the vehicle came to a complete stop at Merit Lake, Herbert’s new home.

A year earlier Andrew the young man was at the links with his father swatting at the third hole, a par four. The August weather had made it ideal for a game of golf at the family’s country club. A terrible slice had brought Andrew’s ball inches from the swampy water hazard. But as he prepared to take a swing he noticed the rough moving. He knelt down to brush the grass to investigate and he saw a poor wounded painter turtle. As he picked up the timid creature he inspected it’s injuries, his shell had been cracked and his legs and neck were lacerated probably the result of a lawnmower accident. He had only one thing to do, bring it home to heal the wounds.

Herbert the turtle was given a home in a small plastic pool equipped with pebbles, plant life, and rocks above water to sunbathe. He spent his summer on those rocks basking in the sun, and his winter beneath a sunlamp. The neglected turtle had finally gotten his break, not to worry about herons eating him or lawnmowers smashing him into pieces. A diet of flies and crickets kept him well nourished and the care of the young man kept him alive.

Almost a year after his adoption Herbert had totally recovered, what was a cracked shell had turned to as impression on the shell. Andrew had noticed this and knew Herbert wasn’t a domesticated animal and belonged in the wild. So one warm day in September almost identical to the day of Herbert’s discovery Andrew decided Herbert needed a new home. Herbert was placed in a temporary home which was a coffee can for the long drive to Andrew’s grandparent’s house. The drive there was one of longest drives ever for Andrew, constantly thinking of what might happen to Herbert in the wild. But as the car parked Andrew didn’t go to the house, he walked behind to the lake where he’d seen turtles before. As he opened the can and saw Herbert’s emotionless face, with his beady eyes that slowly blinked.

Andrew held the little turtle in his hand and slowly placed him in the shallow water. For a few seconds Herbert floated, his way of saying goodbye, then disappeared into the murky water. As Andrew walked away to the house, he wasn’t just walking away from a turtle; he was walking away from a friendship. But now every time he sees a ripple in the water or silhouette in the distance he sees Herbert in his mind trying to thank him.

Ortega
20th January 2004, 01:02
Reading the title, I didn't expect much... :P

But good story, you'll get a good grade on it for sure - I wrote a 16 page paper for History at 5 AM not too long ago and got an A+ on it. Then again, it was on the death of Che Guevara, not exactly a hard subject.

Dirty Commie
24th January 2004, 14:59
I have a similar story about a spiny tailed iguana named Charlotte.

I was given a lizard (my fourth) by a friend of my mom who found an iguana nearly frozen to death two years ago in Sarasotas (about 50 miles south of where I live), being a herp, (some one who loves reptiles more than life itself), I took her and kept her warm , mashed up vitamins in her food (mostly hi-protein collard greens, squash, all the veggie stuff that iguanas dine on), and gave her bits of watermelon, and she eventualy grew quite fond of grapes. When spring came, I moved her out of my bed, and into a large wood framed cage with Im-Ho-Tep, my baby green iguana named after the Egyptian architect/philiosopher/doctor. Charlotte eventually became very healthy and violent towards my other pets and my baby sister. I was forced to release her in June, the day before my birthday, and I spent my birthday angry and looking for her for hours.

The next winter, I found her again, she was weak, cold, thin and had a bad tail. I nursed her back to health, and let her go that spring.

She was evil, she stalked my other pets, slashed my wrists, hunted my baby sister (even though all iguanas are vegatarians, she had a strage craving for human flesh) but I still miss her.

che's long lost daughter
24th January 2004, 18:41
This is my pet story

I once had a pet duckling when I was, I guess 8 or 9. His name was Mickey. One night, as I was holding Mickey in my hand while me and my younger were watching America's Funniest Home Videos, my brother said that he wanted to hold Mickey too but I didn't want to give it to him. But he insisted so what happened next was I and him had some sort of "tug-of-war" over Mickey. The war continued for about 5 minutes until we realised that Mickey was gasping for his breath and he is making this sound which sounded like agony. Upon the realisation, I took Mickey and laid him down on the floor and watched him in agony. I tried to give him air by blowing on him thinking that this would help but to my desperation, it didn't. I told myself, "This is your fault!" and tears just suddenly fell from my eyes. I saw him looking at me with the eyes that tell me "Don't blame yourself..." as he gave his last breath. We buried him the same night and for a long time, I dind't want to hear the theme from America's Funniest Home Videos because it was just too painful.

But Mickey will always be in my heart forever. El Mickey vive para siempre!