Pitch your movie:

[Jimmie Higgins]

Ok, I'm going to play the role of studio money guy: pitch your movie ideas to me.

I want to see a catchy title, and a short punchy synopsis with any actors already tentitivly interested in certain roles. Ideology or fesibility of the movie do not matter to me as I am only playing the role of a Hollywood filmmaker - so make it outrageous, just sell the story to me.

Example (but make them better than this one):

Movie Title: Black Jesus

Synopsis: While both tapping into and profoundly shocking the audience for such hits as "The Passion of the Christ" and the upcoming epic "Noah", "Black Jesus" will tell the story of Jesus but in an ultra-historical, non-theological manner (i.e. no obvious miricles or supernatural events seen in the movie, just referenced second-hand by characters)... and he will be black and most of the leading cast will be Arab.

The plot will revolve around the life of an adult Jesus and the conflicts between rulers and ruled in that era.

Kat Williams is attached to star as the lead.

[Os Cangaceiros]

A brutal hicksploitation survival horror/thriller set in the American South (during a time period yet to be determined, but probably the 70's or 80's), in the style of "Rituals" (1977) or "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (1974). The opening credit montage would be soaring shots of vast bayou wilderness, crazy looking hillbillies, and newspaper clippings reporting about disappearances and missing persons, etc, set to Mountain's "Mississippi Queen". I've been very influenced by "hillbilly orientalism".

I'd cast unknowns and non-professional actors/actresses. Most of the budget would be allotted for special effects...I'd hire Benoit Lestang and Adrien Morot (who worked on the French film "Martyrs") to do makeup work.

[Jimmie Higgins]

^ If you can get Ke$ha to play one of the roles instead of an unknown (she hasn't established herself as an actor yet so we can get the name recognition, but cheap!) and I think we've got a hit!

Next. Go!

[Blake's Baby]

Nonononono! That's not how it works at all!

I've watched 'The Player'. Every movie idea is pitched in this format:

Pitchers: 'It's (an action movie with a heart/a comedy with a dark twist/a thriller with a positive message)... Think X (massive-grossing movie) meets Y (massive-grossing movie, preferably a franchise)... we were thinking maybe A (top-grossing Hollywood male star) and B (top-grossing Hollywood female star)'

Producer: 'Have you got a part for S (name of someone that producer wants to shoe-horn into anything going), s/he's very hot right now?'

Pitchers: (hurried sotto voce conflab): 'Yes, that could work (with some improbable twist of logic)...'

EG: Magic Jackson - the story of an ex-cop who develops extraordinary powers

'It's an action movie with a heart... Think Harry Potter meets Die Hard, we were thinking Will Smith and Kristen Stewart...'

'Have you got a part for Ke$ha, she's very hot at the moment...?'

'Yes, I think that could work, she could play the gun-toting grandmother, we could re-write that so she's a cocktail waitress instead...'

I'm certain that's how it goes. Honest.

[Jimmie Higgins]

^green light. I like it, sort of The Player meets Swimming with Sharks, a meta-movie. A meta-movie with heart though. With heart and a low budget. Should do well in the urban markets. Go. Do it.

Next!

[Blake's Baby]

You're awesome.

[The Douche]

I always thought this would be a good premise for a Troma film, I came up with it back in high school;

Fade in: Some high school kids hanging out in a secluded wooded suburban area, smoking a blunt. Normal kids getting high thing.

They emerge from the woods and return to their car, they pass a number of emergency vehicles and car accidents on the way home. Upon arriving at home they find the house empty and unsecured.

Debate follows about what is going on until somebody turns on the TV, and recognizes the start of a zombie outbreak.

Typical zombie movie stuff follows, they get some supplies, head out on the road, start picking up more survivors etc.

They proceed to make camp in an isolated wooded area, there are a number of tents/cars set up, individuals in the group now include the original kids, a jock they don't get along with from school, and some other figures (maybe a middle aged housewife, some sort of professional dude like a doctor, a spectrum of "average people"). Everybody retires for the night and there are scenes showing each person/group of people speculating on the cause of the zombie outbreak. Each of them is also shown smoking weed (but not as a whole group).

Eventually they all discover that they smoke weed, and develop the hypothesis that the virus is neutralized by THC, and they spend the rest of the movie getting high as fuck, killing zombies, and trying to make the whole world high.

Fade out: A highschool aged post-apocalyptic punk rocker (think Mad Max) clears a large bong rip, sets the bong down, and picks up and loads a shotgun.