Jimmie Higgins
3rd October 2012, 09:02
I was thinking of trying for a career as a crappy stand-up comedian. You know, nothing political, just jokes based on observations about relationships and ethnic groups and stuff like that. Generic comedy so I can get an agent and then become a shrill morning radio DJ who does coke all day.
Here's some examples of some jokes I've been working on using the classical themes of US modern stand-up comedy:
1. Hi, how are you all doing tonight? Ready to hear some jokes? Yeah! Ok, so I recently started dating someone, yeah a real serious relationship and we've started living together and everything. But anyway it's made me come to realize just how different men and women are. For example, did you ever notice how women are always walking around with two X chromosomes? Yeah, what's the deal with that? Are they like: oops I might ruin one, so I'll get two just in case. Wierd, isn't it.
2. So like, have you ever noticed how when you see a Latino on the street and are like, "Hey, Latino!" sometimes they're like, "Hey, I'm Persian, my family moved here from Iran you jerk!". Oh those Latinos. Caliente!
3. Have you guys been following the newspapers about that scandal in Washington? Yeah. Um, could you tell me about it or summerize it for me? I never learned to read.
Here's some examples of some jokes I've been working on using the classical themes of US modern stand-up comedy:
1. Hi, how are you all doing tonight? Ready to hear some jokes? Yeah! Ok, so I recently started dating someone, yeah a real serious relationship and we've started living together and everything. But anyway it's made me come to realize just how different men and women are. For example, did you ever notice how women are always walking around with two X chromosomes? Yeah, what's the deal with that? Are they like: oops I might ruin one, so I'll get two just in case. Wierd, isn't it.
2. So like, have you ever noticed how when you see a Latino on the street and are like, "Hey, Latino!" sometimes they're like, "Hey, I'm Persian, my family moved here from Iran you jerk!". Oh those Latinos. Caliente!
3. Have you guys been following the newspapers about that scandal in Washington? Yeah. Um, could you tell me about it or summerize it for me? I never learned to read.