dumb stuff parents do

[MotherCossack]

In order to spread word of my latest collossal blunder, I have decided to open a new thread.... in that way you get to laugh at my ineptitude and i, by way of a small consolation, get to feel as though i have entertained a select few of my like-minded comrades.
Sound reasonable?

[Ostrinski]

Tell the whole family about very personal issues

[Invader Zim]

Produce offspring who whine about them without real justification.

[MotherCossack]

good.
right then......
let us set the scene..... i am currently stark raving mad, or at least well on the way to being so, due to a very recent move that i undertook with my family.... of about 6 streets across the northern tip of a well known north London borough.
Our destination was a house which shares many characteristics with me.....tall, skinny, unusual and blatently unlike any of those around it.
so fam is well stressed... innit bruv...
i say:
HEY YO LOT.... LETS.. LIKE ... GO CINEMA... FURRA TREAT..... LIKE.... WE 'AVE EARNED IT FAM.
so we get ready to go.....but at the last moment stroppy daughter gets stroppy, for a change. says:
MUMMY..... I ACTUALLY HATE YOU..... NO THERE'S NO WAY I'M GOING WIV YOU.
YOU ARE REVOLTING.
bla bla bla bla. the rest of us pile out the front door. the colonel[he of revleft fame] says.... [critically]
BYE FAM. ENJOY PLAYING ON THE MAC!!!!!
i stop in my tracks !!!!!! determined to spoil the fun of said daughter i announce [with some venom]:
OH NO YOU DONT.... YOU LITTLE SHIT..... COS I AM TAKING THE MOUSE!!!!!!
i triumphantly storm out the house brandishing the mouse above my head......

forget all about the little tiff...... go to cinema..... see lovely little cartoon.... have a lovely time....
film ends......
we get up to leave......
i feel a tail dangling down my leg.... find a usb lead almost touching the floor.
it leads into my bag.... i pull it and out pops an unfamilar small remote control sized object .....

WHAT THE HELL.... i mutter....with absolutely no recollection of what i put in my bag just an hour or two before.....so i dump the piece of junk on the floor .... pleased with myself for being forthright.... no point in filling up my new house with clutter i say to myself.

two hours later at home.... other daughter asks:
MUMMY CAN I HAVE THE MOUSE FOR A MINUTE? i stare at her for a moment.... blankly......then i remember the unidentified object.... what i did with it.... where i dumped it..... what it actually was!!!!!!

Despite rushing back at midnight to the cinema, never got it back......
dumb or what?

[MotherCossack]

listen... i am tired... i just want to amuse you.... if you're gonna act like fucking anally retentive arseholes with no sense of humour then i have had it with this whole thing and am off the way of my son.... you lot are pissing me off ok

[MotherCossack]

listen... i am tired... i just want to amuse you.... if you're gonna act like fucking anally retentive arseholes with no sense of humour then i have had it with this whole thing and am off the way of my son.... you lot are pissing me off ok

he he he.....ooh was I in a bidova pickle!
So.... I s'pose I should say i am sorry for being all unnecessary and ... well downright rude really.....
but..... ok... i'm sorry.... but there is truth in them thar hills.... i mean words.....

oakey dokey.... as sanity crumbles to dust.... well ... that which pertains to me anyway.....

alright alright .... talk sense woman!!!!!

were was I?.......
Y'all should have seen my one woman show!!!!
it was spectacular in its celebration of the self..... myself..... obsessively so!!!!! paying particular attention to the shoddy end of that self.....
ooh... did i gerra big Stick......
did I heck!!!!! and did I use it!!!!!!?
did I heck!!!
That was fun that was!!!! Back in the day!!!
when i was still in the game....

All this fuss.....
so I moved...... it happens.....get over yourself mother!

[cynicles]

I'm not really sure what's going on here but if you want my advice, do like the yanks do and drug up the whole family, it won't deal with your problems but it will sweep them under the rug!

[Yuppie Grinder]

Give them pills when you feel intolerant or impatient with them acting like children.

[PC LOAD LETTER]

Give them pills when you feel intolerant or impatient with them acting like children.
This pisses me off to no end.

"My child's acting like a child! Oh no! Give him ritalin!"

[Os Cangaceiros]

I'd love it if my folks hooked me up with some Ritalin.

[PC LOAD LETTER]

I'd love it if my folks hooked me up with some Ritalin.
I had an uppers phase when I was 19, but now I enjoy sleep too much for that shit. :bored:

[edit]
As I post this at 2:19AM

[Robespierres Neck]

Having your children being raised & taught by what the television tells or shows you.

[Prometeo liberado]

This pisses me off to no end.

"My child's acting like a child! Oh no! Give him ritalin!"

Then I propose the parent take the ritalin themselves. Problem solved!

[MotherCossack]

I'm not really sure what's going on here but if you want my advice, do like the yanks do and drug up the whole family, it won't deal with your problems but it will sweep them under the rug!

This is a most wondrous and entertaining dialogue..... pertinent yet ridiculous. Tempting in its super---ficial simplicity..... Bolder than Ariel, but not as clean.......

I love you all........!


Give them pills when you feel intolerant or impatient with them acting like children.

DOES THAT INCLUDE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????? OOH I DO HOPE SO!!!!!!!!!!!!!


This pisses me off to no end.

"My child's acting like a child! Oh no! Give him ritalin!"

Hey....... at least it is in a bottle with a label on it!!!!!!!!.... Do you have any idea what is being injested by all of us on a second by second basis..... curtesy of a world controlled by idiots, buffoons and men with gold coins in their eyes and sand in their hearts!!!!!!!!!!!?????

DO YOU KNOW WHERE IT ENDS? I DONT....... AND FOR WHAT IT IS WORTH..... I AM SURE THERE IS NO GOD OVERSEEING THINGS....... OTHER THAN THE GOOD THAT EXISTS SOMEWHERE IN ALL OF US.


I'd love it if my folks hooked me up with some Ritalin.

OOH OOH.... SAME..... SAME!!!!!!! except that i speak in the past tense..... Mine just offered up a generous and ongoing supply of boring old dopey dope dope.....

excuse me while i.....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......stagger off to seek the Nurofen

Who said this shit dont give you a hangover????????

You lied...... only it aint the next day........ this shit hangs over right into the here and now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NO WAY HOSE!!!!!!!!!!!! ME NO L-I-K-E-E-!!!!!!!!!!!!


I had an uppers phase when I was 19, but now I enjoy sleep too much for that shit. :bored:

[edit]
As I post this at 2:19AM

Ha Ha Ha..... Me, You, both........ Only........ How did you learn to dig sleep!!!!!!!!!!!



Then I propose the parent take the ritalin themselves. Problem solved!

THIS IS THE RIGHT ANSWER!!!!!!!!!!!!

YES YES YES YES!!!!!!!!!! Will you marry me!!!!!!??????? Hang on..... Are you a geaser?..... yes.... ? good.... Are you straight?...

Whatever.... i am serious.... think it over..... we could make a movie .... it would be .... hilarious, ridiculous and unforgettable!!!!!!!!!!!

[Igor]

what's going on

[Agent Ducky]

Parent logic. Today my mom slips on papers that were on the ground and has a cursing fit about it. She yells at me to PICK THEM UP RIGHT NOW and about how she FELL SLIPPING ON THOSE PAPERS YESTERDAY.
Which begs the question, if they're so hazardous, why didn't you pick them up yourself?

[cynicles]

You could also bake some brownies for the whole family to chill everyone out.

[Comrades Unite!]

I had an uppers phase when I was 19, but now I enjoy sleep too much for that shit. :bored:

[edit]
As I post this at 2:19AM

No wonder you're a Left Communist.


lol, jk jk

[bcbm]

get buried in debt, become alcoholics

[Goblin]

Telling their kids that their too skinny. Im 18 and my parents still tell me to gain weight.

[Raúl Duke]

bought an over-priced house with a stupid mortgage, now the mortgage is "underwater" and the house depreciated in value big time.

It's also amusing, when I was a child I told them that I thought buying a house with a mortgage was stupid especially when you think of it as an "appreciating-value investment" which I thought was non-sense since houses don't make anything (like factories do).

[Nox]

My stepdad makes sexual advances on my mum infront of us lol


StepLAD

[MotherCossack]

i have been the mother of all dumb stuff lately.......

the life cycle of a cossack clan:

i teenage, moody, erratic, unfettered, easily led, lonely, unsure, seeker of approval and ripening nut-job.... drifts........

by accident... makes babies....
temporary bliss ensues.... ish... anyway.

babies grow.....
start questioning the mother....
threaten to upset the balance....
approach the age when mother started having problems herself.......
oh dear!!!!!!!! tricky!!!!!!!
mother is reminded of bad shit......
mother is threatened by unfinished business that pops up through them.....
mother fears that the shit is hitting the fan and all of them will be covered in it.
mother realizes that despite the continuous, strenuous efforts to be a mum like she never had.......for all these years...
she realizes how easy it is to become removed from what everyone else thinks of her....
has spent so long considering herself to be right and in the right..... good and always good for them....
now realizes that........ she could have been lying to herself....
am i the worm that they say i am......
or is it only me who thinks that?????
too tired for this

[Comrade Jacob]

Old thread but hey...
"I'm worried you're becoming extremist Jake".
I lol'd when my parent said that.

[BIXX]

Old thread but hey...
"I'm worried you're becoming extremist Jake".
I lol'd when my parent said that.


I get that a lot, from nearly every adult in my life.

[Sinister Intents]

Old thread but hey...
"I'm worried you're becoming extremist Jake".
I lol'd when my parent said that.

My parents just accept that I'm an extremist :) sucks getting called a terrorist though :/

[Comrade Jacob]

My parents just accept that I'm an extremist :) sucks getting called a terrorist though :/

My parents know I'm a communist that's probably because of my constant capitalism bashing and my communism praising. By extremist they mean: 'getting a few pals together and waging a people's war and blowing shit up for the sake of it and going all Khmer-rouge'
They still have the cold-war mentality to some degree.

[Tenka]

Work, facebook and netflix, sleep, work, facebook and netflix, sleep, work, facebook and netflix, sleep, work, facebook and netflix, sleep, work, binge drink, facebook and netflix, sleep...

Waste money on supplements believing all the untested claims on the fronts of the labels. Call everything that doesn't agree with what they want to believe an "opinion" and ignore it.

[Arlekino]

Truth story my mum found a boyfriend younger than me, when I so him I thought I would pass out, ah drinking together he took her pension, exploited with money I was mad, seriously I was mad. Sadly she passed away few years ago so mum I forgive you for that.