Ever wonder what Marx and other philosophers were like in bed?

[Questionable]

Sometimes when I'm reading huge political and/or philosophical tomes, I can't help but imagine what the author's sex life was like. I mean, Marx had three kids, didn't he? So he definitely had sex at least three times. What was that like? Was he just really boring? Or was he a total animal? What about Lenin or Trotsky or Stalin? Or even non-communist figures like Nietzsche?

[Trap Queen Voxxy]

I bet Che was a beast.

[Comrades Unite!]

Coffee was spat when I seen this topic.

[Questionable]

Coffee was spat when I seen this topic.

Think about it. Something like Das Kapital is so thick and non-sexual. But what if, sometime while writing it, Marx saw his wife across the room, dropped the pen, and went over there to fuck her? What if he stopped writing temporarily on chapter 2 to fuck his wife? It almost changed my perception of the book.

[Pretty Flaco]

If I ever wrote a book, I'd fuck somebody before I wrote each chapter. Then I could talk about it in an interview, "where'd you get the inspiration?" "from a hell of a lot a sex".

[Luc]

i bet Freud was all kinds of kinky

[RedHammer]

I bet Marx was great in bed. He'd make sure his wife had adequate access to his means of production.

[Drosophila]

This is what we have the drunk thread for.

[Questionable]

I have a feeling Trotsky was one of those guys that fucking sucked but thought he was amazing. Everyone always said he was an arrogant guy. He probably couldn't make her cum but then he was like "Damn, I'm great, aren't I baby?"

Stalin has quite a reputation as a ladies' man, so I imagine he know how to please.

Lenin and his wife never had a child, and I believe it was rumored that they married just so she could leave the country with him. Maybe Lenin was one of those rare breeds that was too busy to think about sex. I heard he was very into nudism, though.

Too bad that daft punk guy isn't here anymore. He'd probably see my comment about Trotsky and write an article talking about how Trotsky was a sexual supreme, complete with quotes from Lenin supporting his viewpoint.

[Os Cangaceiros]

I can honestly say that I have never once (to the best of my memory) thought about how good or bad Karl Marx was in bed.

Until now, unfortunately. I imagine that his beard was abrasive.

[Vladimir Innit Lenin]

I bet Karl often got top Marx in bed.

[Rusty Shackleford]

I bet Karl often got top Marx in bed.
knees have been slapped, good sir.

[Veovis]

I bet Che was a beast.

I don't agree with his politics, but Che is the only famous revolutionary I would ever deign to sleep with.

[Igor]

Think about it. Something like Das Kapital is so thick and non-sexual.

you mean i'm the only one? :(

[mew]

this is a good thread

[¿Que?]

I am so glad nobody beat me to this.

Apparently, old Nietzsche only had sex once in his life. It was with a prostitute, in which he contracted a horrible disease which drove him mad, and made him very physical weak.

How sad. How very very sad.

[Questionable]

I am so glad nobody beat me to this.

Apparently, old Nietzsche only had sex once in his life. It was with a prostitute, in which he contracted a horrible disease which drove him mad, and made him very physical weak.

How sad. How very very sad.

Well damn. I wonder if it was worth it?

[Dennis the 'Bloody Peasant']

..oddly enough, no

[Comrades Unite!]

Think about it. Something like Das Kapital is so thick and non-sexual. But what if, sometime while writing it, Marx saw his wife across the room, dropped the pen, and went over there to fuck her? What if he stopped writing temporarily on chapter 2 to fuck his wife? It almost changed my perception of the book.

I don't think I will ever read the book the same way again.
The thought of him writing about the Fetish of Commodities right after giving Jenny a good boning.

[Questionable]

I don't think I will ever read the book the same way again.
The thought of him writing about the Fetish of Commodities right after giving Jenny a good boning.

It really gives a new perspective on "fetish."

[Comrades Unite!]

It really gives a new perspective on "fetish."

It does.

I'd imagine Karl Kautsky was lame and Che boned well.
Marx rode Jenny well,A good oul riding.

[Ostrinski]

Undoubtedly Che fucked like an animal. You just cant be Che and not fuck like an animal. The math doesnt add up.

I cant imagine anyone sleeping with Trotsky.

For some reason when I look at Stalin all I can thnk about is what a giant dong he probably had.

Lenin was such a cynic, you know that man was not getting laid

Luxemburg enjoyed holding the reigns with regard to the affairs of the bed

[Ostrinski]

Maybe Ismail can tell us something about Hoxhas sex life

[Ostrinski]

Kautsky seems like that guy that no one thinks can fuck well but is actually superb

[Drosophila]

Are you high?

[A Revolutionary Tool]

This discussion is stupid. We all know Che wasn't very good in bed on account of how bad his asthma was. The first time he had sex he had to stop half-way through because he started to have an asthma attack.

[Hit The North]

I cant imagine anyone sleeping with Trotsky.



Trotsky was every inch the dapper ladies man.

He nailed the artist, Frida Kahlo, among others.

https://encrypted-tbn2.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQEBP2kiyT818PYZkbYTXVMdDkelqkfC wNy2gucoyKeAvmnDoq9oA

(In)famously, Marx has been accused of getting his housemaid up the duff.

The other roaming Lothario of the left, with an eye for the ladies, was Friedrich Engels, who lived 'over the brush' with Mary Burns and, after her death, he moved-in her sister, Lizzie.

More recently, it has been claimed that Gerry Healey, leader of the now defunct WRP, used his position to molest young female recruits.

[Vanguard1917]

This place is worse than OK! magazine.

[citizen of industry]

Shame on all of you. Their ideas just weren't enough, were they? A spanking and off to bed with the lot of you.

[Questionable]

Shame on all of you. Their ideas just weren't enough, were they? A spanking and off to bed with the lot of you.

You know, Mao seems like the kind of guy who was into spankings.

While we're on the subject, why stop at historical figures? What about our own fellow forum members? I can imagine Rafiq being really submissive. "AUGH, WHIP ME HARDER, YOU PETITE-BOURGEOIS PIECE OF SHIT."

[Hit The North]

This place is worse than OK! magazine.

Except better and in reverse. We trivialise the lives of great people whereas they aggrandise the lives of trivial people.

[Art Vandelay]

I can't imagine Stirner being a very generous lover.

[NoOneIsIllegal]

Marx had three kids, didn't he? So he definitely had sex at least three times.
To be fair, he spent long nights at the museum. Maybe hot-tube Johnny or the pool boy stopped by.

[NoOneIsIllegal]

Maybe Ismail can tell us something about Hoxhas sex life
i LOL'd

[Comrades Unite!]

To be fair, he spent long nights at the museum. Maybe hot-tube Johnny or the pool boy stopped by.

Marx had six kids didn't he?
Three died young and the other three lived on past Marx's death.

Before Marx spent practically all his time in a Museum he boned Jenny well.

I wonder what Engels was like.Probably used his Doormat beard for contraception.

Trotsky is that type of person who no one thinks bones well but infact does.

Stalin was short.

Mao got spanked that is why his face looks like that all flat.

Hoxha had a seriously weird face so he probably had an experience with a dildo.

Lenin contracted std's from a Social Democrat.

Che passed out from boning.

Fidel boned well.

Hegel was too fat.

Plato boned well.

[Questionable]

Actually, I think Fidel was probably boring since he was all Catholic and shit. He probably only did missionary position sex for procreation.

[Prinskaj]

Stalin has quite a reputation as a ladies' man, so I imagine he know how to please. Orgasm or gulag!

[Quail]

What the fuck is this thread?? I have never really thought about how good philosophers were in bed because, to be honest, why would I? I don't tend to get aroused when I'm reading political theory so sex doesn't really cross my mind when I'm thinking about philosophers.

[Comrades Unite!]

Orgasm or gulag!

Hmm. this orgasm seems to resemble a trotskyist orgasm.

[Hit The North]

What the fuck is this thread?? I have never really thought about how good philosophers were in bed because, to be honest, why would I? I don't tend to get aroused when I'm reading political theory so sex doesn't really cross my mind when I'm thinking about philosophers.

Weirdo.

[Ostrinski]

If his beard is any indication, then Stalin was quite a prolific lover.

I was thinking of this upon looking at a picture of him while in class today.

[Ostrinski]

Jim Morrison fucked all his fans

[Ostrinski]

While we're on the subject, why stop at historical figures? What about our own fellow forum members?Now this is an innovative idea.

Here's an extension: someone names a user, then that user has to tell us about his/her sex life, then names another person

[cynicles]

I bet Rosa was pretty good, the fact that she made it with men half her age has gotta say something about her sex life. I bet Che was aweful, men that goodlooking always get a pass in life and turn out to be really bad in bed.

[Comrades Unite!]

Lizard King

[Art Vandelay]

Now this is an innovative idea.

Here's an extension: someone names a user, then that user has to tell us about his/her sex life, then names another person

Haha..this could get interesting....

[Luc]

Haha..this could get interesting....

not really,

i think this'll be rather short, actually given the site's demographics...

edit: actually forget that

Lizard King u have been name, spill the beans i bet u are a beast in bed :D

[Hit The North]

I bet Che was aweful, men that goodlooking always get a pass in life and turn out to be really bad in bed.

Good to know :thumbup1:

[Ostrinski]

Lizard Kingmy sex life is about as existent as a donkey goose on heroin

This may turn out to be a bad idea

Fuck the Clock, lets hear it good citizen

[Comrade Samuel]

I stumbled into the wrong part of the Internet again.

[Questionable]

I stumbled into the wrong part of the Internet again.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLVRXy-vyYQ

[Trap Queen Voxxy]

I don't agree with his politics, but Che is the only famous revolutionary I would ever deign to sleep with.

http://i689.photobucket.com/albums/vv255/Correctness/Ernesto_Che_Guevara_-_Rare_Photos_8.jpg

I would do wonderful, terrible things with Che. :wub:

[¿Que?]

Stalin had that mustache, so there are a few techniques the ladies might have considered positive of the old fella.

Trotsky was down with OPP, and I don't think Diego ever forgave him.

Existentialist marxist Simone de Beauvoir epitomizes the image of the erotic and sultry french woman. She died ten years after I was born - missed it by that much!

Rosa Luxemburg I don't know much about, but that spirit of rebellion must have translated to the bedroom somehow - OUCH! At least in the spirit of egalitarianism, I'd imagine she made sure everybody came.

Marx was probably a selfish lover, at least when he didn't pass out in a drunken stupor half way through.

Engels "I buy you nice things! We have sex tonight, yes?"

Lenin - it's a long train ride from Germany to Russia, and what are you gonna do, read the whole way?

Bakunin's general disregard for hierarchy impelled him to only have sex standing up, so as to ensure noone was on top.

Che and Fidel - They're Latin, nuff said.

[Art Vandelay]

not really,

i think this'll be rather short, actually given the site's demographics...

edit: actually forget that

Lizard King u have been name, spill the beans i bet u are a beast in bed :D

Hahaha good point actually, not saying I don't fit the sites demographics (teenage male) but I do have a regular sex life (not as badass as it sounds, long time relationship)....waiting for call out. :blushing:

[Rusty Shackleford]

i hang my head in shame because of this thread's existence.

[cynicles]

Stalin had that mustache, so there are a few techniques the ladies might have considered positive of the old fella.

Trotsky was down with OPP, and I don't think Diego ever forgave him.

Existentialist marxist Simone de Beauvoir epitomizes the image of the erotic and sultry french woman. She died ten years after I was born - missed it by that much!

Rosa Luxemburg I don't know much about, but that spirit of rebellion must have translated to the bedroom somehow - OUCH! At least in the spirit of egalitarianism, I'd imagine she made sure everybody came.

Marx was probably a selfish lover, at least when he didn't pass out in a drunken stupor half way through.

Engels "I buy you nice things! We have sex tonight, yes?"

Lenin - it's a long train ride from Germany to Russia, and what are you gonna do, read the whole way?

Bakunin's general disregard for hierarchy impelled him to only have sex standing up, so as to ensure noone was on top.

Che and Fidel - They're Latin, nuff said.
Probably.

Yes!

Yes!!

Rosa had a relationship with a younger mana and she was a total dom with Leo, I'd imagine she likes being in control.

Doubtful.

Maybe.

He probably would read the whole way, I doubt Lenin ever had sex his entire life.

I bet Bakhunin had sex like a fratboy.

Fidel, yes. Che, no.

[Comrades Unite!]

Ftc

[Questionable]

You know, I really wanted to read what Engels had to say about dialectics today, but then I ended up reading this thread.

[Veovis]

http://i689.photobucket.com/albums/vv255/Correctness/Ernesto_Che_Guevara_-_Rare_Photos_8.jpg

I would do wonderful, terrible things with Che. :wub:

Doesn't matter how asthmatic he was, I'd do all the work.

[blake 3:17]

There was a book published last year about Marx's marriage. Haven't read it yet, but will.

Here's a review: http://www.washingtonpost.com/entertainment/books/love-and-capital-karl-and-jenny-marx-and-the-birth-of-a-revolution-by-mary-gabriel/2011/08/29/gIQAwSsUkL_story.html

[Ostrinski]

Blake 3:17, only person to take this thread seriously

[Positivist]

Che was definitely a beast.

Stalin either had a monster or a baby down there.

Trotsky was a virgin.

Lenin had sex out of duty. He lender out his shlokg for the common good of all the proletariat.

Mao was into young girls. (Not necessarily a pedo, but definitely small females of some sort.)

Kautsky was more of a lover.

Marx was definitely a beast.

Engels definitely had a new girl every week.

Hoxha was a sex machine.

Rafiq is above the human appetite for sex.

[Questionable]

Blake 3:17, only person to take this thread seriously

I was taking this thread pretty seriously myself.

[human strike]

Zizek anyone?

I don't think we need to imagine with him actually. He talks about his sex life far too often for anyone's liking. :/

[ken6346]

edit

[Ostrinski]

Stalin and Trotsky were secret lovers.

[Jazzratt]

Good to see you haven't changed, Revleft.

[Il Medico]

Good to see you haven't changed, Revleft.
My thoughts exactly Jazzy.

[Positivist]

Stalin and Trotsky were secret lovers.

Yes and shit got weird after Stalin wanted to get into some kinky stuff and Trotsky declined so the whole split thing happened.

[Questionable]

Well I think we can all say we've learned a lot from this thread.

[Manic Impressive]

Lenin had an affair with Inessa Armand who was said to be very beautiful. He was also very into physical fitness so he probably had plenty of stamina. Although he does come across as very sex negative in some of his writings. (Can't remember which one)

Marx was very romantic ever read any of his poetry? But it's safe to say that sex wasn't his everything. He was engaged to Jenny for 6 years before they married. It's also reported that he had eyes for other ladies. I remember reading something about a French opera singer who he became mildly obsessed with. And of course there's Helen Demuth's son, although there's only scant evidence to suggest the child was Marx's. Such as a couple of letters by Jenny saying stuff like she's disappointed and is no longer close friends with Helen and stuff like that. However, with all Marx's ailments boils on his bum, bad backs and respiratory problems and the fact that it was one of the most sexually repressed era's of history might give some indication of what he was like in the sack. What's kind of interesting though is the communal living that he did with Jenny and other couples in their younger days. They were certainly interested in challenging the stereotypical model of the family but could that have extended to sex as well?

Engels on the other hand lived with Mary AND her sister at the same time and is thought to have been involved in a relationship with both. He also talks of longing for the days of wandering the French countryside sampling wine and farmers daughters.

but no I've never thought about it and you're all very strange

[Lenina Rosenweg]

Undoubtedly Che fucked like an animal. You just cant be Che and not fuck like an animal. The math doesnt add up.

I cant imagine anyone sleeping with Trotsky.

For some reason when I look at Stalin all I can thnk about is what a giant dong he probably had.

Lenin was such a cynic, you know that man was not getting laid

Luxemburg enjoyed holding the reigns with regard to the affairs of the bed

Apparently women thought Lev Bronstein was hot. Besides his famous affair with Frida hie is believed to have had an affair with Diego Rivera's 15 year old daughter.This was when he was in his 50s.

There was a tradition in 19th century Europe for bourgoius women to sleep with the son of their best friend when he came of age so he could lose his virginity. (They weren't like prudish Americans). Anyway Rosa slept with a kid, I forget his name. It turned into a minor scandal because Rosa literally fell in love with the kid. The affair only ended with WWI when the kid as drafted into the German army.

Later Rosa kicked out Leo Jogiches when she discovered that he was "seeking comfort" from female comrades. Later she married a socialist but non-political German doctor who was killed at the end of WWI.

Having said all this, I have actually never once wondered or cared much what these people were like in bed.Engels was pretty randy and Marx was a bit of a prude but I don't really either one of them were great at pleasing women. Che, I don't have to mention. Trotsky-well history speaks for itself.

[cynicles]

Marx was a prude? Didn't he cheat on his wife with the maid? I thought Rosa was only married once for convenience sake to acquire german citizenship or something.

[bad ideas actualised by alcohol]

There was a book published last year about Marx's marriage. Haven't read it yet, but will.

Here's a review: http://www.washingtonpost.com/entertainment/books/love-and-capital-karl-and-jenny-marx-and-the-birth-of-a-revolution-by-mary-gabriel/2011/08/29/gIQAwSsUkL_story.html

I have read it, I remember a bit about Jenny and Karl's “first time”.

[Luc]

i bet Castro and Che shared a bed during the war, that'd be so hot!

http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb57088/godfather/images/4/4d/Fidel_Castro.jpg

http://libcom.org/files/images/history/LEGANERD_038671[1].jpg

[Il Medico]

I'd imagine both Marx and Engels were pretty beast based on their beards alone. Engels certainly comes off as the type to sleep around a lot, as well.

Che, to me, has always come off as the guy who seems like he'd be amazing because of his rugged good looks but is actually a bit disappointing in the sack.

Stalin probably gave the best mustache rides.

[Questionable]

Just imagine Marx or Engels going down on a lady with those huge beards...

[Luc]

Just imagine Marx or Engels going down on a lady with those huge beards...

i hear pubic hair stimulates the clitoris during penal-vaginal intercourse

wonder if that'd have the same effect...

[Nox]

Stalin was obviously the best in bed.

[Ostrinski]

Besides his famous affair with Frida hie is believed to have had an affair with Diego Rivera's 15 year old daughter.This was when he was in his 50s.what the fuck

[bad ideas actualised by alcohol]

what the fuck

My thoughts exactly.

Why is this in chit-chat, surely important historicall discussions like these should be in ,well, History.

[Luc]

Ew, Can you imagine? It'd be like getting head from Santa Claus...Terrifying.

hehe ya didn't think of that till now :blink:

---------

seem Trotsky was into all sorts of kink ;)

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_sKmUW8U4m0c/TGx_LMR1_YI/AAAAAAAACJM/DoFLJlU0gFs/s400/trotsky-punishing-two-sisters.jpg

[¿Que?]

hehe ya didn't think of that till now :blink:

---------

seem Trotsky was into all sorts of kink ;)

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_sKmUW8U4m0c/TGx_LMR1_YI/AAAAAAAACJM/DoFLJlU0gFs/s400/trotsky-punishing-two-sisters.jpg
What. Ever.....:rolleyes:

[Luc]

What. Ever.....:rolleyes:

photographic evidence! Trotsky was cleary kinky as fuck i mean just look at it Public sex, BDSM, and Spanking all in one? ;)

[Nox]

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_sKmUW8U4m0c/TGx_LMR1_YI/AAAAAAAACJM/DoFLJlU0gFs/s400/trotsky-punishing-two-sisters.jpg

What's the story behind this picture?

[Il Medico]

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_sKmUW8U4m0c/TGx_LMR1_YI/AAAAAAAACJM/DoFLJlU0gFs/s400/trotsky-punishing-two-sisters.jpg

What's the story behind this picture?
Photoshop.

[Luc]

Photoshop.

in my defense

i didnt do it, got it from somewhere else :p

[X5N]

http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/161/654/what%20going%20obama.gif

[Robespierres Neck]

I laughed a lot reading this thread. Questionable, you are hilarious.

[Zealot]

Marx seems like the kind of guy who would leave sex mid-way to write down a great idea he had while getting it on with Jenny.

Engels, Stalin and Che were obviously all a ladies man.

Lenin was too busy thinking about how treacherous the mensheviks were to be any good.

And as for Trotsky...

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-bYwcmlMxsXU/UA_ugRxYU2I/AAAAAAAAEVw/VzWvf9ucU8M/s1600/forever-alone-face.png

[Questionable]

OH DAMN. One of my comrades found this letter from Trotsky in one of Robert Service's biographies.


Since my arrival here, my poor dick hasn't even once gotten hard. It seems that it doesn't even exist. It too is resting, after the tension of the past few days. But there isn't only that - I also, with all my heart - I think with tenderness about the softness of your dear old pussy. I want to fuck it, and push my tongue in its depths. Nataliochka, my dear, I will fuck you with all my strength, with my tongue and my cock.
Bibliography: Trotski à N. Sedova, 19 Juillet 1937, dossier Trotski (HLA), bMS Russ 13.1 (10622), page 4

[Lenina Rosenweg]

That's so sweet!

After Natasha found out Trotsky was having an affair with Frida there was, for obvious reasons a chill in their relationship.Trotsky patched things up with a series of sexually explicit letters to Natasha. This was unusual for him.

[Ostrinski]

Trotsky was quite the romantic

[Comrade Samuel]

:bored:
OH DAMN. One of my comrades found this letter from Trotsky in one of Robert Service's biographies.


Since my arrival here, my poor dick hasn't even once gotten hard. It seems that it doesn't even exist. It too is resting, after the tension of the past few days. But there isn't only that - I also, with all my heart - I think with tenderness about the softness of your dear old pussy. I want to fuck it, and push my tongue in its depths. Nataliochka, my dear, I will fuck you with all my strength, with my tongue and my cock.
Bibliography: Trotski à N. Sedova, 19 Juillet 1937, dossier Trotski (HLA), bMS Russ 13.1 (10622), page 4

That actualy seems real with all the citation and what not. It...it is fake....right? :huh:

[Igor]

oh trotsky you make me blush

[Ostrinski]

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_sKmUW8U4m0c/TGx_LMR1_YI/AAAAAAAACJM/DoFLJlU0gFs/s400/trotsky-punishing-two-sisters.jpg

What's the story behind this picture?this my dearest of comrades, is what won the civil war.