Dealing with Aggression?

[Landsharks eat metal]

I don't know if anyone is going to read this or respond to this because usually when I post threads like this they mostly get ignored, but I was wondering if anybody had any tips on what to do with my anger and aggression. I mean, of course, in ways that won't get me or anyone else hurt, killed, or arrested.

Right now, my coping mechanisms include:
-music (which doesn't always help very much)
-taekwondo classes (which often makes it worse because I've been working insanely hard at it for 3 years now and still suck at it, whereas there are a bunch of little kids who come in, don't try at all and are automatically much better than me at it, which pisses me off)
-driving too fast/impulsively (and subsequently getting yelled at by my mother, who won't let me drive on my own
-various unhealthy choices (cutting myself so I won't lash out at anybody else, overeating to block out my emotions, etc.)

Fuck this sounds awkward, but I can't think of any other way to say it. I just want some other way to deal with things.

[Comrade Jandar]

In all seriousness, masturbate more and then take a nap.

[Sperm-Doll Setsuna]

In all seriousness, masturbate more and then take a nap.

Sorry, but from personal experience I can testify that these suggestions are fruitless at doing anything about anger, hate and insufferable rage. Even doing it 5-6 times a day doesn't do nuffin'

[Sasha]

Discipline I would say, drill yourself into an almost military mindset. Set out clear rules and routines for yourself, force yourself to stick to them. Maybe switch to a sport where it isn't all technical but also involves more stamina and brute force like kick boxing, days when you do not train at least do a set amount of push ups/sit ups. If it helps you, go straight edge, drugs (inc alcohol) are control inhibiters. It doesn't have to be all physical, setting yourself to read at least so much pages of non-fiction can be just as effective.
It sounds weird from one anti-authoritarian to another but some people just need an drill sergeant, in our case that just means it needs to be ourselves.

[Ele'ill]

I don't know if anyone is going to read this or respond to this because usually when I post threads like this they mostly get ignored, but I was wondering if anybody had any tips on what to do with my anger and aggression. I mean, of course, in ways that won't get me or anyone else hurt, killed, or arrested.

Right now, my coping mechanisms include:
-music (which doesn't always help very much)
-taekwondo classes (which often makes it worse because I've been working insanely hard at it for 3 years now and still suck at it, whereas there are a bunch of little kids who come in, don't try at all and are automatically much better than me at it, which pisses me off)
-driving too fast/impulsively (and subsequently getting yelled at by my mother, who won't let me drive on my own
-various unhealthy choices (cutting myself so I won't lash out at anybody else, overeating to block out my emotions, etc.)

Fuck this sounds awkward, but I can't think of any other way to say it. I just want some other way to deal with things.

I don't know what will work for you but I'll just go ahead and share some things that I did/do. I sucked at karate but was ok at muay thai. Regarding martial arts maybe switch it up and learn something else. During the more difficult times I got into the habit of calling out of work and going to the ice rink and doing sprint drills from line to line so it was just a solid burn without the racing or painful thoughts I would get. Sometimes I would have the entire rink to myself. It wasn't a bad way to spend days off from work and it was an improvement from what I would normally do. I've found having a place to go walk for hours if needed is so important for me. It used to be this giant lake but I moved and I haven't found a decent place to walk around so I usually walk down to the city and just watch everything that's going on.

[Os Cangaceiros]

Maybe medication of some sort?

I know that a lot of people are apprehensive about going on medication for psychological ailments, but it may help (depending on your disposition). I wouldn't recommend medication for someone with just a bit of a temper, but the admission that you cut yourself so that you won't hurt other people indicates a somewhat deeper problem.

Also, exercise is good.

[NewLeft]

Try to write out your anger.

[Landsharks eat metal]

Maybe medication of some sort?

I know that a lot of people are apprehensive about going on medication for psychological ailments, but it may help (depending on your disposition). I wouldn't recommend medication for someone with just a bit of a temper, but the admission that you cut yourself so that you won't hurt other people indicates a somewhat deeper problem.

Also, exercise is good.
The problem with that is that I'm already on medication (for depression and anxiety), but it stopped working. I told my doctor that, but he won't do anything about it. Granted, I've only seen him once, but I honestly am not sure if I want to deal with that, if it will hinder me as I'm trying to find a way to move out on my own this fall.

A lot of the thoughts and feelings I've had, I've never shared with anybody besides a few trusted Revlefters that I've accidentally ended up spilling things to. Some of the things are so horrible I feel like I'd get in trouble, or they'd at least send me to the hospital again.

[Landsharks eat metal]

Discipline I would say, drill yourself into an almost military mindset. Set out clear rules and routines for yourself, force yourself to stick to them. Maybe switch to a sport where it isn't all technical but also involves more stamina and brute force like kick boxing, days when you do not train at least do a set amount of push ups/sit ups. If it helps you, go straight edge, drugs (inc alcohol) are control inhibiters. It doesn't have to be all physical, setting yourself to read at least so much pages of non-fiction can be just as effective.
It sounds weird from one anti-authoritarian to another but some people just need an drill sergeant, in our case that just means it needs to be ourselves.
I've tried doing things like that, but I always end up fucking up and hating myself for it, then not knowing how to get back into it.

[Sasha]

Get as soon as possible out from where you are now, if you parrents don't let you explain it as the health issue it is, if they still do not allow it choose for yourself and just go. Go to a big, queer positive city, find there a trustworthy queer positive youth therapist the day after you arive. In the mean time repeat to yourself "this will pass", "so much days till I get out of here" etc etc. Have a very safe journal, if necessary somewhere online in a special mail account. Count down the days until you get out no matter what on a calendar.
Sometimes family relationships can be easier fixed from a distance when the other party really understand that they can either choose to be part of your new life or not but that you will live this life with or without them.

[Trap Queen Voxxy]

I believe what I have is called the "warrior gene," or Monoamine oxidase A (MAO-A) where I genetically have difficulty controlling emotions such as anger, aggression and so on (OP you might want to look that up). The way I have tried to cope with this is when I feel I'm about to lose it I just seperate myself from what I'm currently doing and go have a smoke break. I find if you just remove yourself from X situation and go to a quiet place by yourself, breathe, relax and so on, the emotions fade (and the pipe ritual and nicotine help as well). I also like to go aggro inline skating around the town (when I have time) which the extra boost of adrenaline and dopamine also helps to calm me down and keep me balanced. I also do parkour which also causes the same thing.

Other more mundane activities such as chess and reading help too. As well as caring for my scorpion and using it's health, well being and enclosure maintaince as a distraction hobby. I would highly recommend moving away from your more destructive coping mechanism though I can't necessarily talk because if all else fails, I usually crush my anger in my mind vice via booze.

Hobbies are a big thing, you might want to take up a martial art form (I use to go to a jujitsu, judo and ninjitsu dojo) or even archery and firearms. While I'm not Buddhist, I've also tried to start doing Buddhist meditations as a way to just still the mind and remained balanced.

[TheGodlessUtopian]

Thread moved :)

[ellipsis]

I'm not ignoring this thread, we talk in private, I'm on my phone so it's hard to type right now. other posters have some good ideas that I have suggested before, ie gtfo.

[ВАЛТЕР]

Don't worry friend, you aren't the only one who is experiencing these problems. Maybe a few days of complete relaxation may help? Do you have any time off to go and just lay back and do what you want for a couple of days? That always helped me in the past.

I've been having problems too for the past year or so.

Even though I box and thus work out regularly which has always been my saving grace and kept me a balanced individual. My anger and aggression problems are starting to creep back up on me. They've been dormant since I start boxing 7+ years ago, but in the past year I have already acted violently 3-4 times often times blacking out. This is very much unlike me and I've been wondering what to do. Boxing isn't helping anymore. I love it and will continue to compete. However, it isn't keeping me balanced like it used to. A lot of stuff in my life has been going backwards in the past year or so as well so that may have something to do with it, stuff I wouldn't want to discuss. However I have already acted in such a way which brought the police out as well as injured someone (unintentionally) in a fit of rage. I need to figure out what is wrong with me. It may just be a combination of stress and me being int he wrong places at the wrong times, but I fear I am going to hurt myself or someone else over something insignificant.

Sorry if I am complaining in your thread. I just had to bring up my problems as well.

[Positivist]

It is always important to identify the source of the problem. Have you had relationship troubles, lost loved ones, been targeted by peers, or been left dissatisfied with yourself? I understand all of these feelings and know the pain that they can instill into you. Life is full of suffering and I find it helps to identify the cause, even if only a little. In some cases one may even be able to cut out problematic areas of their lives after identifying them.

[Homo Songun]

I believe what I have is called the "warrior gene," or Monoamine oxidase A (MAO-A) where I genetically have difficulty controlling emotions such as anger, aggression and so on (OP you might want to look that up).

Lol this is ideological baloney

[homegrown terror]

have you tried to play a very violent, brutal video game? i've often found that killing pretend people makes real-world people much more bearable. or, for the same concept but with a physical aspect, look up and see if there's a local paintball/airsoft group in your area.

[Zav]

You could go to a shooting range, or a demo range if you live in the Southwest and have a bit of money.

You could learn blacksmithing. It's a wonderful hobby, and will teach you control while allowing you to hit things really hard.

[Firebrand]

Step one- go on internet

Step two- find nest of right wingers

Step three- call them nasty stuff until you get banned from the forum

If this doesn't help then get out of the house. Don't go anywhere specific just walk around in random places, if theres any nearby green space that can be good, if not than anywhere you can get a bit of space, avoid indoor areas and other people though.

It can also be helpful to do some stuff that is a bit dangerous. I don't mean deliberatly setting out to get hurt but do stuff that carries a bit of risk, it helps release stress.