Story

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

I think it would be interesting for us to start a story thread. All who are interested can write two, maybe three sentences, then next users post two or three sentences, and so on and so forth.

I'll begin :

The terrain was bleak with the sensation of strife among the inhabitants. A man yells out from the top of his voice and says....

[Now the next person will follow up with what that mans says]

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

"...Stalin is coming. Hide your chickens!"

[Deicide]

Omsk, the petit-bourgeois kulak, swallowed his chickens whole, while they were still alive, so Comrade Stalin couldn't take them

[NewLeft]

Deicide is executed by the people's commissariat.

[Deicide]

Who's Deicide? I only see Broseph Stalin ;) Plus.. your addition to the story just doesn't follow dude, come on..

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

After the chickens were swallowed the people gathered one hidden egg, one chicken, and one rooster. This brought hope to the people that the chickens would provide nourishment in the future. Joseph Stalin's horse died on his journey and his arrival wasn't going to be for another 3 weeks.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Omsk, the petit-bourgeois kulak, swallowed his chickens whole, while they were still alive, so Comrade Stalin couldn't take them

But Comrade Stalin came and said, "You disgusting kulak! Where are your chickens? I require them for my new Animal Farm." He punched Omsk in the stomach and out came the chickens. He took the chickens away and proceeded to send Omsk to a gulag in Alaska.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

After he took the chickens he made a 5 year plan on how they would reproduce and provide more chickens for the community. The plan seemed to be working well for the first two weeks. Then came a foreign legion of soldiers who brought conflict to the community.

[NewLeft]

A statue of stalin falls.

[A Revolutionary Tool]

The hooded ones set fire to the chicken coops and escaped in the dead of night, leaving Stalin to believe that it was somebody in the community that sabotaged his plan.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

Stalin angry at the recent sabotage summoned his closed followers. He ordered them to set fire to his rivals house.

[NewLeft]

Stalin angry at the recent sabotage summoned his closed followers. He ordered them to set fire to his rivals house.
Trotsky's house was toilet papered.

[A Revolutionary Tool]

His rivals are killed but a infant girl is saved from the flames. 20 years later the girl is a woman and finds out about Stalin's treachery. She sets out to avenge her dead parents.

[NewLeft]

His rivals are killed but a infant girl is saved from the flames. 20 years later the girl is a woman and finds out about Stalin's treachery. She sets out to avenge her dead parents.
She was a leading brezhnevite.

[Deicide]

With the help of Comrade Trotsky, together they killed Comrade Stalin with an ice pick.

[A Revolutionary Tool]

With Trotsky replacing Stalin as leader he leads the glorious socialist world revolution that Stalin could never. The world is socialist in less than 4 years.

[NewLeft]

The hooded ones set fire to the chicken coops and escaped in the dead of night, leaving Stalin to believe that it was somebody in the community that sabotaged his plan.
ALF claims responsibility. Animals are set free.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

While Trotsky's bureaucratic state constrained it's citizenry, the people gathered to remove the state. Thus a revolution occurred. What replaced the state was a classless, stateless society where freedom thrived.

[Brosa Luxemburg]

Then they got naked.

[MotherCossack]

and began the age old, powerful and potent fertility ritual. usually performed in twos, the people dutifully arranged themselves accordingly... and got into position.....

[MotherCossack]

{ someone do another sentence ...quick... i wanna go again.... this is fun!]

[NewLeft]

Trotsky liked being in control..

[Pretty Flaco]

So Trotsky found 7 of the most able bodied men and women on the block and commanded them to bend over. "It'll all be over very soon..." he whispered into each of their ears. The delight in his voice was sickening.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

Then a diplomat arrived from a far land. His name was Edward, he represented the United States of Dramerica. In his right hand, he held a suit case filled with money, in his left, a document requesting permission to build.....

[Pretty Flaco]

the world's largest electron microscope.

[Nox]

the world's largest electron microscope.

He had a wank and spunked all over it, then his female assistant came in and they did anal + scat

[NewLeft]

He had a wank and spunked all over it, then his female assistant came in and they did anal + scat
Trotsky woke up from his Nox-ian wetdream. He never killed Stalin with an icepick..

[Firebrand]

And then the Earth was invaded by green aliens and the human race was plunged into years of opression by the evil speciesist colonialist regime, and all peaceful dissenters were shot in order to maintain the power of the empire, leaving the oppressed no choice but to form a guerilla army.

[Brosa Luxemburg]

And then the Earth was invaded by green aliens and the human race was plunged into years of opression by the evil speciesist colonialist regime, and all peaceful dissenters were shot in order to maintain the power of the empire, leaving the oppressed no choice but to form a guerilla army.

Then a giant boner appeared. Super effective.

[Yuppie Grinder]

Lead by dear leader Giant Boner, the guerilla army overthrew the colonialist regime and established a democratic dictatorship of the proletariat and peasantry.

[Firebrand]

The newly liberated planet earth then used its fleet of newly nationalized space ships to go and help other oppressed peoples rise up against their evil opressors. And then all the ships were magically turned into pink elephants leading to much confusion and the free distribution of tequila to help people cope with this bizzarre turn of events.

[Pretty Flaco]

But Trotsky wasn't allowed a political position in Giant Boner's political cabinet because he wasn't a pink elephant and he hated tequila. So he called up his homies, cus it was time to ride.

[Comrade Samuel]

But Trotsky wasn't allowed a political position in Giant Boner's political cabinet because he wasn't a pink elephant and he hated tequila. So he called up his homies, cus it was time to ride.

He then proceeded to take a giant steaming shit on "the system" before he passed out and fell into a river due to lack of blood going to his brain

[seventeethdecember2016]

He then proceeded to take a giant steaming shit on "the system" before he passed out and fell into a river due to lack of blood going to his brain
Suddenly, a portal opened to another dimension. All the people of Earth gathered and found out that it was opened by all the sectarian strife that occurs within the Left. Everyone then decided to Unite creating one giant Marxist-Leninist-Trotskyist-AnarchoSyndicalist-Maoist-Bonerist-Jacobinist-Titoist-Castroist-UltraLeftist-SocialDemocratic-RosaLuxemburgist society where...

[Brosa Luxemburg]

...where Roosterism was acknowledged as the highest level of Marxist development.

[NewLeft]

Roosterism became the universal tendency of the left.

[Pretty Flaco]

... That is until a new split emerged. The left could not come to a consensus on the complicated issue of j-walking. The debates were so heated and the arguments so wild that Trotsky's heart just couldn't handle the fighting anymore. The fighting tore his poor heart into two like it had been struck with the sharp point of an icepick.

[Brosa Luxemburg]

The party decided that j-walking was counter-revolutionary and bourgeois. The consequences of j-walking was execution by firing squad or 30 years in the gulag.

[NewLeft]

The split weakens the support for socialism throughout the world. The capitalists have won back the majority of the world.

[Pretty Flaco]

So they all threw a party. Everyone (that owned the means of production) was invited and they sipped champagne and wine, discussed golf and lacrosse, and of course they had wild orgies with models and escorts.

[NewLeft]

Until the anarchists showed up and bombed the place to smithereens.

[Pretty Flaco]

One party goer named Johnny Walker joined in with the anarchists because he liked blowing shit up to shit and so he bombed that shit with shit until that shit was blown like shit to shit. He was able to sneak in with the anarchists because he had ironically dressed as poorly as possible.

[NewLeft]

John Walker went on to infiltrate the Roosterites.

[dodger]

Nox couldn't believe his good fortune. The sentence was 6yrs in a Penile colony. He had asked THE PEOPLES COURT for 10.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

John Walker went on to infiltrate the Roosterites.

But soon, the Marxist-Leninists rose Stalin, Hoxha, Mao, and the entire WWII Red Army from the dead and told them to kill all the Roosterites, Anarchists, and other ultra-leftists on the planet. They obeyed. Soon, the working class was once again liberated. Ismail was the General Secretary of the Global Party of Labour, Omsk was his right hand man in the Central Committee, Comrade Commistar was the Head of Propaganda (he eventually lost his mind and was sent to an Alaskan gulag), and Bostana just made statues of us. Meanwhile, the revived Marxist-Leninist leaders were doing nothing except fighting each other. Hoxha shot Mao in the face for cheating on him with Nixon and Stalin literally absorbed Hoxha into his body. But then, the Titoites stole the technology the Marxist-Leninists used to revive their leaders and proceeded to revive Tito and his partisans. Stalin shitted himself. The working masses of the world could not pick who to support, so Ismail jumped out a window and Omsk took some cyanide pills. Tito led his partisan army to Moscow to meet with Stalin, and then.......

[NewLeft]

But soon, the Marxist-Leninists rose Stalin, Hoxha, Mao, and the entire WWII Red Army from the dead and told them to kill all the Roosterites, Anarchists, and other ultra-leftists on the planet. They obeyed. Soon, the working class was once again liberated. Ismail was the General Secretary of the Global Party of Labour, Omsk was his right hand man in the Central Committee, Comrade Commistar was the Head of Propaganda (he eventually lost his mind and was sent to an Alaskan gulag), and Bostana just made statues of us. Meanwhile, the revived Marxist-Leninist leaders were doing nothing except fighting each other. Hoxha shot Mao in the face for cheating on him with Nixon and Stalin literally absorbed Hoxha into his body. But then, the Titoites stole the technology the Marxist-Leninists used to revive their leaders and proceeded to revive Tito and his partisans. Stalin shitted himself. The working masses of the world could not pick who to support, so Ismail jumped out a window and Omsk took some cyanide pills. Tito led his partisan army to Moscow to meet with Stalin, and then.......
Tito was shot dead by a closet ultraleftist.

[Ostrinski]

Tito was shot dead by a closet ultraleftist..Who found Tito's copy of Cock and Ball Torture: A Guide for Beginners.

[citizen of industry]

Lacking leadership and with the central government in chaos, the issue of jay-walking suddenly revived and became the focal point of debate.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Comrade Commistar eventually died in one of the Alaskan gulags of his creation, one day before the end of his one year sentence. He died of not being able to eat enough babies. Revived Stalin built a statue of him in Moscow.

[NewLeft]

A group of sailors got lost in a storm. They arrived on an island and socialism exists there.

[citizen of industry]

A group of sailors got lost in a storm. They arrived on and island, colonized it and socialism exists there.

Where jay-walking is rampant and there are no traffic rules. The sailors, tattooed and drunk on rum, renounce socialism and go seeking treasure.

[NewLeft]

The central government decides to take a 2 month cruise to the Caribbean to cool off the stress and ease the tension.

[TheGodlessUtopian]

So Trotsky found 7 of the most able bodied men and women on the block and commanded them to bend over. "It'll all be over very soon..." he whispered into each of their ears. The delight in his voice was sickening.

I don't want to see anymore posts like this one: insinuations of eventual rape is not allowed.

(The answer to this would be that it wasn't rape but I believe it was so coming from the thread and the way it is phrased)

[NewLeft]

The central committee sends a bottle of vodka and a rabbit to all its citizens to deal with the rising rabbit population.

[Pretty Flaco]

The storm that the sailors were in finally subsides.

[MotherCossack]

meanwhile the greek gods all awake from a deep alcohol and drug induced sleep, which lasted millenia ...they all feel terrible and are dismayed when they realize how overgrown and unruly their garden and zoo has become

[Brosa Luxemburg]

Then the gods jay-walked

[NewLeft]

A tornado moves the central committee office to the arctic.

[Yuppie Grinder]

Bewildered after finding themselves in the arctic, said central committee turned their snapbacks backwards, lit up some blunts, and brought out the cooler which was filled with delicious 40s.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

While the bourgeois were having orgy parties, Have333333, NewLeft, FUCK, Anti-Capitalist, Firebrand, and ProvenSocialist decided to crash it. They did so by showing Dick Cheney's scrotum.

[seventeethdecember2016]

This case of party crashing caused a gigantic class war, in which the Bourgeois employed a new class of Selfs to fight against the new-aged Workers. While all this fighting went on, Havee3333333 decided to go to the portal to the next dimension that everyone else had disregarded. He decided to enter, although radiation from it was enormous, in a hopeful attempt to stop the monstrous class war that would surely end the world.
When he entered, he saw a world literally made of genie lamps. Havee3333333 quickly grabbed one and rubbed it. A genie came out and offered him three wishes, which Havee3333333, being a well disciplined Socialist, used to wish for eternal life for all, a Communist world, and to close the portal when he leaved so no one would ever be able to make a self righteous wish. The portal was closed, and Havee3333333 went all around the world and found a classless, stateless society where the workers owned the means of production in common, and international solidarity had been proclaimed. To go along with it, everyone in history had been resurrected with his wish for eternal life for all. Havee3333333 simply integrated himself into society without anyone realizing what he had just done.

Humanity was about to colonize Mars when...

[Workers-Control-Over-Prod]

This case of party crashing caused a gigantic class war, in which the Bourgeois employed a new class of Selfs to fight against the new-aged Workers. While all this fighting went on, Havee3333333 decided to go to the portal to the next dimension that everyone else had disregarded. He decided to enter, although radiation from it was enormous, in a hopeful attempt to stop the monstrous class war that would surely end the world.
When he entered, he saw a world literally made of genie lamps. Havee3333333 quickly grabbed one and rubbed it. A genie came out and offered him three wishes, which Havee3333333, being a well disciplined Socialist, used to wish for eternal life for all, a Communist world, and to close the portal when he leaved so no one would ever be able to make a self righteous wish. The portal was closed, and Havee3333333 went all around the world and found a classless, stateless society where the workers owned the means of production in common, and international solidarity had been proclaimed. To go along with it, everyone in history had been resurrected with his wish for eternal life for all. Havee3333333 simply integrated himself into society without anyone realizing what he had just done.

Humanity was about to colonize Mars when...

Yuri Gagarin said "it is so red up here. No frontiers to conquer" and the Red Army decided to go back to planet earth finding that the reactionary anarchists had reinstated capitalism...

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

The Anarchists did not reinstate Capitalism, this was a rumor spread by some of the ML's to gain supremacy. This rumor was quickly debunked, and the stateless, classless society was flourishing.

[citizen of industry]

The Anarchists did not reinstate Capitalism, this was a rumor spread by some of the ML's to gain supremacy. This rumor was quickly debunked, and the stateless, classless society was flourishing.

Until a new strain of pig-bird-cow virus spread and caused a pandemic of massive proportions that had everyone bleeding uncontrollably out of every orifice.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

The streets filled with bacteria, and a plague ensued. Touching every part of the community.

[Nox]

The streets filled with bacteria, and a plague ensued. Touching every part of the community.

The plague caused everyone to get boners 24/7 so everyone had sex and got HIV

[Comrade Samuel]

The plague caused everyone to get boners 24/7 so everyone had sex and got HIV

...every man, woman and child knew thease where the end times when humanity would finally meet it's end. The ancient god Vladmir makarov came down from the heavens and proclaimed "REVENGE IS LIKE A GHOST....NOW DIE MOTHER MOTHER F*CKERS!" and in a sudden flash of light all matter, all engery absolutely everything in the universe was all but destroyed leaving nothing but cold empty blackness. One day after millions and millions of years spent waiting in solitude the great god grew bored and so with a snap of his fingers a Brand new universe formed in which...

[citizen of industry]

...every man, woman and new thease where the end times when humanity would finally meet it's end. The ancient god Vladmir makarov came down from the heavens and proclaimed "REVENGE IS LIKE A GHOST....NOW DIE MOTHER MOTHER F*CKERS!" and in a sudden flash of light all matter, all engery absolutely everything in the universe was all but destroyed leaving nothing but cold empty blackness. One day after millions and millions of years spent waiting in solitude the great god grew bored and so with a snap of his fingers a Brand new universe formed in which...

Class struggle began...

[NewLeft]

The bourgeois win and capitalism is fully reinstated.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

The bourgeois win and capitalism is fully reinstated.

Xram, a 119th Century German, notices this class struggle and writes the Communist Manifesto. He asks himself, "What is a communist?"

[Ocean Seal]

Xram, a 119th Century German, notices this class struggle and writes the Communist Manifesto. He asks himself, "What is a communist?"
Of course Xram could only barely realize the implications of what he had written.

[NewLeft]

Xram reverses his name to Marx to hide from the paw-lice.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Edit: his name was Lrak Xram.

[Susurrus]

And that was the moment the Moon Nazis decided to launch their invasion.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

And that was the moment the Moon Nazis decided to launch their invasion.

But it is too early in history, so they fly back to the moon!!!!!!!!

[Pretty Flaco]

But it is too early in history, so they fly back to the moon!!!!!!!!

But it was too late. Lrak Xram was already wise of their scheme. It was time to blow the moon to smithereens.

[Nox]

But it was too late. Lrak Xram was already wise of their scheme. It was time to blow the moon to smithereens.

But just before he could do that, he got arrested and imprisoned for raping his dad

[seventeethdecember2016]

No one believed Lrak Xram, so they just ignored him. While the God Vladimir Makarov was watching all this unfold, he was suddenly attacked by Havee3333333 who had been waiting for millions of years for him to turn his back. Havee3333333 defeated him and then killed all the other Gods, which caused him to become a god in turn. Havee3333333 then destroyed the moon Nazis with a flick of his hand. He then purged the minds of all humans and made their only objective to create and sustain Communism. While Havee3333333 was busy meddling in human affairs, Yehweh confronted him. A big battle of two Gods ensued where...

[Susurrus]

No one believed Lrak Xram, so they just ignored him. While the God Vladimir Makarov was watching all this unfold, he was suddenly attacked by Havee3333333 who had been waiting for millions of years for him to turn his back. Havee3333333 defeated him and then killed all the other Gods, which caused him to become a god in turn. Havee3333333 then destroyed the moon Nazis with a flick of his hand. He then purged the minds of all humans and made their only objective to create and sustain Communism. While Havee3333333 was busy meddling in human affairs, Yehweh confronted him. A big battle of two Gods ensued where...

Bakunin systematically disproved their existence, and then stabbed them to death when they protested, causing both to vanish.

[Brosa Luxemburg]

Then they got naked.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

Crack cocaine was invented then the people were hooked on drugs.

[Brosa Luxemburg]

The ones that weren't smoking crack were to busy furiously masturbating to notice.

[NewLeft]

Anti-Capitalist abandoned the rest of the party to jack off because he was too horny.

[seventeethdecember2016]

This lead to the rise of the Zombie Apocalypse, as humanity was occupied with drugs and other pleasures while Yehweh and Havee3333333 were busy fighting. The leader of the Zombie Apocalypse was Georgi Zhukov who...

[NewLeft]

smoked weed erryday.

[seventeethdecember2016]

Zhukov, who was irrational due to the drugs, decided to invade Germany trying to take down Hitler. Hitler, who had died millions of years ago, wasn't at the helm of Germany, so confusion existed among many Germans. Germany didn't even have an army... The invasion caused Germany to be conquered in 2 weeks, and within the next few months Zhukov conquered the entire European continent, Russia, the Middle East, and neighboring states. Zhukov decided to call this vast Empire 'Eurasia.'

[Comrade Samuel]

Among the zombies was the zombie god Vladmir makarov who was resurected to bring firey unrelent vengeance down on havee333333 for his betraying him years ago so Vladmir makarov summoned his team of zombies that included the power rangers, Stalin, Godzilla, darth vader, Rambo, batman, robo-tupac, Jesus and they crated the ultimate zombie monster known as "robo-power-bat-tupac-Stalin-Jesus-Rambo-vader-torn 3000 from hell AND outer space" and they proceeded to smash him into oblivion (where there is in fact a gulag) ....

[seventeethdecember2016]

Havee3333333 had just defeated Yehweh, which made him the sole leader of all the heavens.
After slowly becoming more knowing of what was occurring on Earth, Havee3333333 organized a fleet of heavenly Proletariat, which he organized after he killed Yehweh and all of his angels, to recapture Earth from Georgi Zhukov.
When robo-power-bat-tupac-Stalin-Jesus-Rambo-vader-torn 3000 came to heaven, Havee3333333 offered anyone who defected to be absolved of all their sins. Stalin and Jesus broke away, and since they were the muscle of the coalition the whole thing came crashing down. Jesus and Stalin thus defeated each one of their former allies. Havee3333333 now set his sites on Vladmir Makarov, who was in the bathroom when Havee3333333 arrived.
Havee3333333 offered a simple proposition, which was to join his side as a heavenly proletariat and to renounce all evil. Vladmir Makarov said...

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Then Comrade Commistar rose from his Alaskan grave and killed NewLeft in his sleep.

[Brosa Luxemburg]

said, "Lets hit this blunt."

[NewLeft]

The sailors laugh at the stalinists on mainland.

[NewLeft]

Newleft never died, he was buried alive.

[Nox]

Newleft never died, he was buried alive.

He was buried alive in a shared coffin with someone else who happened to be buried alive. They did anal and ate eachothers shit until they were rescued by...

[NewLeft]

He was buried alive in a shared coffin with someone else who happened to be buried alive. They did anal and ate eachothers shit until they were rescued by...
Nah, it was some kafkaesque surrealist shit, Newleft had split personality. Newleft was rescued by Nox.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Nah, it was some kafkaesque surrealist shit, Newleft had split personality. Newleft was rescued by Nox.

Then Nox ate NewLeft and he finally died. But then Enver Broxha chopped off Nox' head.

[gorillafuck]

that'll do pig. that'll do.

[NewLeft]

A zeekloid appears..

[Pretty Flaco]

... and he's with his first cousin. They're on a date.

[NewLeft]

Zeekloid and his cousin sitting in a tree.. k i s s i n g.. first comes love.. then comes..

[Comrade Samuel]

Havee3333333 had just defeated Yehweh, which made him the sole leader of all the heavens.
After slowly becoming more knowing of what was occurring on Earth, Havee3333333 organized a fleet of heavenly Proletariat, which he organized after he killed Yehweh and all of his angels, to recapture Earth from Georgi Zhukov.
When robo-power-bat-tupac-Stalin-Jesus-Rambo-vader-torn 3000 came to heaven, Havee3333333 offered anyone who defected to be absolved of all their sins. Stalin and Jesus broke away, and since they were the muscle of the coalition the whole thing came crashing down. Jesus and Stalin thus defeated each one of their former allies. Havee3333333 now set his sites on Vladmir Makarov, who was in the bathroom when Havee3333333 arrived.
Havee3333333 offered a simple proposition, which was to join his side as a heavenly proletariat and to renounce all evil. Vladmir Makarov said...

"can you come back later? I'm trying to shit here!"...

[gorillafuck]

nugfest 2012

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

After the crazy turn of events, ProvenSocialist arrived from a several years of exploration, to which he found fertile land. Once he arrived to notice everyone of the good news, he was suddenly sickened by the clouds of crack and pot smoke that have accumulated over the years of excessive drug use, and the facial expressions of Have33333333 molesting a chicken. When ProvenSocialist told the good news of his conquest for fertile land, a man in the crowd yelled ....

[gorillafuck]

heady bong nug

[Brosa Luxemburg]

After the crazy turn of events, ProvenSocialist arrived from a several years of exploration, to which he found fertile land. Once he arrived to notice everyone of the good news, he was suddenly sickened by the clouds of crack and pot smoke that have accumulated over the years of excessive drug use, and the facial expressions of Have33333333 molesting a chicken. When ProvenSocialist told the good news of his conquest for fertile land, a man in the crowd yelled ....

Blunts are good, but bongs are better. Just like kunts are good, but dongs are better.

:laugh:

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

When he heard what the man in the crowd said. He quickly pulled a gun out, and pointed it at the man then preceded to say "LISTEN, MOTHERFUCKER! I TRAVELED HALF THE GODDAMN PLANET FOR A BETTER PLACE FOR US ALL, AND YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT MARIJUANA AND REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS!

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

All drugs and cousin incest become illegal.

[Brosa Luxemburg]

lol, this story idea was fucking great.

[NewLeft]

A famine caused by a forest fire destroying all the crops, occurs on the sailor's island. All sailors died, the communists are blamed.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

Subsequently after incest was made illegal, Comrade Comrade Commistar, was apprehended for groping his 5th cousin while intoxicated. His punishment was swift and decisive. The punishment included..

[Brosa Luxemburg]

making love to Sarah Jessica Parker. Oh god, the horror he must have endured!

[NewLeft]

Comrade Commistar died from sleeping with the horse. The next morning, an uprising of old people occurs..

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Subsequently after incest was made illegal, Comrade Comrade Commistar, was apprehended for groping his 5th cousin while intoxicated. His punishment was swift and decisive. The punishment included..

Anything after 2nd cousin is legal, dude. For making false accusations, ProvenSocialist is sent to an Alaskan gulag. He is forced to build statues of the long-forgotten Lrak Xram for five whole years.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

making love to Sarah Jessica Parker. Oh god, the horror he must have endured!

For making sleep me with a horse, Anti-Capitalist is executed.

Then, COTR shows up.....

[Brosa Luxemburg]

For making sleep me with a horse, Anti-Capitalist is executed.

Then, COTR shows up.....

who brings Anti-Capitalist back to life. Anti-Capitalist decides to get his revenge on Comrade Commistar by calling him a "Stalinist" instead of a "Marxist-Leninist" every second of the day.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

ProvenSocialist, was not exiled to the gulag. The prisoner transport ship carrying ProvenSocialist was suddenly captured by ProvenSocialist via cyanide in the vodka supply, which he knew the crewman fancied. He turned the ship around and saw Comrade Commistar on the harbor, ProvenSocialist said : "You can't stop me!"

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

who brings Anti-Capitalist back to life. Anti-Capitalist decides to get his revenge on Comrade Commistar by calling him a "Stalinist" instead of a "Marxist-Leninist" every second of the day.

Then I start calling him Daft Punk.

[Brosa Luxemburg]

Then everyone got naked

[Omsk]

Now that Omsk had read this thread,he decides to abandon this dimension.

[NewLeft]

Then everyone got naked
Anti-Capitalist goes skinny dipping with sarah jessica parker.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Now that Omsk had read this thread,he decides to abandon this dimension.

Omsk ends up in a 4th dimension gulag where Marxist-Leninists who abandon this dimension go. It is called Ilog Koto and there they pull out his fingernails until......

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Anti-Capitalist goes skinny dipping with sarah jessica parker.

It is in a big lake in the forest. Comrade Commistar happens to be walking through that forest at the same time, on his way to drop off a basket of goodies at his sick grandmother's house. He sees them and cannot handle the sight of Anti-Capitalist making love to the horse in the cold lake. He lights himself on fire and some of the trees around him also catch flame.....

[Brosa Luxemburg]

Anti-Capitalist jumps into the flames and kills himself. The reason why is obvious.

[Leonid Brozhnev]

Omsk throws billions of nano-Stalins out of his sleeves who proceed to cannibalize his captors. The nano-Stalins set him free but take his trans-dimensional device to invade a dimension where Trotsky has become an omnipotent universal demi-god. It is a battle that lasts until the end of time, but in the meanwhile...

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Omsk throws billions of nano-Stalins out of his sleeves who proceed to cannibalize his captors. The nano-Stalins set him free but take his trans-dimensional device to invade a dimension where Trotsky has become an omnipotent universal demi-god. It is a battle that lasts until the end of time, but in the meanwhile...

Omsk escapes and goes to hell to speak with the late Comrade Commistar. He tells him of the horrors they made him endure. They made him touch Lindsay Lohan's face.

[Brosa Luxemburg]

Anti-Capitalist is in heaven and gets to fool around with Megan Fox all day, err day.

[Leonid Brozhnev]

Heaven doesn't exist, and Anti-Capitalist wakes up licking between Comrade Commistar's toes.

[MotherCossack]

the rather tawdry greek gods stand around sheepishly .. while zeus interrogates them......
"Who the fuck told men, women and beasts about the Joy of sex?....
WELL!!! who was it....?
I mean ... you know they'll be at it til the end of time now...
Crap... you lot are a bunch of blundering idiots.... i've a good mind to relegate the lot of you to hell for all eternity... now piss off and find me a mortal to play with..."

[NewLeft]

Que in Anti-Capitalist: Then everyone got naked

[Pretty Flaco]

the rather tawdry greek gods stand around sheepishly .. while zeus interrogates them......
"Who the fuck told men, women and beasts about the Joy of sex?....
WELL!!! who was it....?
I mean ... you know they'll be at it til the end of time now...
Crap... you lot are a bunch of blundering idiots.... i've a good mind to relegate the lot of you to hell for all eternity... now piss off and find me a mortal to play with..."

It then became apparent that Prometheus had not only given humans fire, but he had also taught them how to fuck. And boy did he teach them well!

[Pretty Flaco]

this story is nonlinear as fuck

[TheGodlessUtopian]

Heaven doesn't exist, and Anti-Capitalist wakes up licking between Comrade Commistar's toes.

After said toes were properly licked an army of Militant Reptilian Libertarian mutants appeared to force the world under the free market heel!

[NewLeft]

The workers seized the means to access a computer with internet and they went on Revleft.

[Pretty Flaco]

but they had a dialup connection and kept getting calls from doorknob salesmen. so they...

[Leonid Brozhnev]

this story is nonlinear as fuck

Although, it's not even surreal enough.

Melting hamsters chortle and scream as a robot juxtapositions his breast towards a steamy garden of milky fingers protruding themselves up from the crimson skittled soil. We all shit buckets of Marx flavored gummy worms in celebration as the stars and the oceans spiral into a whirl-hole of everythingness. The world becomes deafeningly orange when an explosion from the anus of time renders all clinically alive. Suddenly I revolution all over the place, the universe turns inside in and we call fart off into a jazzy interlude composed by a gangrenous polyp.

Shh... the beginning. The show is about to start... everybody... everybody make this face :bored:

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

Killed the salesman and discovered a thing called pornography. This came as a curse because they were now counter-revolutionary against the free-market. They spend their time and money into porn subscription giving the new rulers the money needed to continue to exploit them and squander any rebellion made against them by the Anarchist and Council Communists.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

This thread worries me.

[Pretty Flaco]

This thread worries me.

And so I changed the point of view of the story into 1st person. I really appreciated the change.

[Leonid Brozhnev]

This thread worries me.

Worry is a social construct bro, we need to smash the worry! Anyway, I've smashed worry out of existance, now you can expropriate the masses of their excess doubt and they can look forward to a colourful communist future where everybody has equal amounts of fucking pizza!:thumbup1:

[roy]

Killed the salesman and discovered a thing called pornography. This came as a curse because they were now counter-revolutionary against the free-market. They spend their time and money into porn subscription giving the new rulers the money needed to continue to exploit them and squander any rebellion made against them by the Anarchist and Council Communists.

the society d/evolved into a revolutionary pornocracy ruled by ruthless, dictatorial pornocrats. the only hope for humanity was the alliance of neo-puritan anarcho-monks. shit was thoroughly whack.

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

This all changed when a power-surge happened. It lasted for 6 years, causing the population to quit their actions cold turkey.

[MotherCossack]

and calm descended upon planet earth.
meanwhile in an alternate universe where orifices have not evolved and the inhabitants have become much more sophisticated with waste disposal, nutrient injestion and of course reproduction/ mating/grown up fun stuff......whereby they, using the large protuding antennae, produce........

[ColonelCossack]

sausages which tasted a bit like

[seventeethdecember2016]

chicken.
While all this was going on, the God Havee3333333, who defeated Yehweh and Vladmir Makarov, saw all this violence and cried. He then noticed Omsk walking to the portal that he had closed just a few years ago, and confronted him. After a long discussion, Havee3333333 decided that he was going to send Omsk to another dimension where only the enlightened were allowed. He opened a new portal and only allowed the 'enlightened' to enter. Havee3333333 then sent a messenger to ProvenSocialist and asked him to round up all the enlightened people of the Earth before he destroyed the Sodomites that plagued any progress. ProvenSocialist got the message and decided to...

[Leftsolidarity]

eat tons of apple&cinnamon oatmeal while riding space camals with all the enlighted people to the galaxy of turdlaxia. On the ride there....

[Nox]

eat tons of apple&cinnamon oatmeal while riding space camals with all the enlighted people to the galaxy of turdlaxia. On the ride there....

they sucked eachothers dicks, and one guy got mad and chopped off his girlfriend's arm

[ColonelCossack]

Which started sprouting thousands and thousands of snakes of many and varied species; these then scuttled into their mouths and turned them into enormous blue

[Deicide]

Then Comrade Stalin was resurrected as Zombie Stalin and Stalinism took over the world, making Comrade Commistar a very happy kid, THE END.

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

Then Comrade Stalin was resurrected as Zombie Stalin and Stalinism took over the world, making Comrade Commistar a very happy kid, THE END.

But Comrade Commistar found out that it was not really Joseph Stalin who was leading the global proletariat to communism, but the imposter Broseph Stalin. Despite the fact that he has died many times in this story and has lived through many destroyed universes, Comrade Commistar comes up with a plan to kill the ultra-left tyrant.

[Leftsolidarity]

Involving allying with his arch nemesis Daft Punk...

[Anarcho-Brocialist]

Now that Comrade Commissar murdered the impostor with a rusty nail and steel toe cleats, he observes ProvenSocialist, whom he condemned to a gulag in Alaska. What he saw was horrific and terrorizing. In Proven's hand dangled the head of his closet companion, in the other, a M1911 .45 colt automatic. Proven the squeezed the trigger then....

[seventeethdecember2016]

Comrade Commissar dies, and ProvenSocialist, who is now satisfied with his actions, moves along. Moments later Havee3333333 comes to Comrade Commissar's rescue by reviving him and healing his wounds. Havee3333333 then asked Comrade Commissar what his current task is, and to that Comrade Commissar replied that he was going to kill Broseph Stalin. Havee3333333 snapped his fingers and Broseph Stalin was dead. Havee3333333 then summoned the real Stalin, who had become allies with Havee3333333 after accepting his proposal to be absolved of his sins, and they had a long discussion about the new dimension that they had to attend as soon as possible. Since ProvenSocialist had been messing around, it was now Comrade Commissar's responsibility to round up all of the enlightened. Havee3333333 then teleported Stalin to the dimension of the enlightened. Havee3333333, who had seen all the tyranny caused by the RevLeft members, decided that all the good-hearted Proletariat must go to the next dimension as well.
The only people who Havee3333333 considered to be Sodomites were the tyrannical members of RevLeft who hadn't been following up on Havee3333333's self-righteous story-line and the Bourgeoisie of course.
Comrade Commissar didn't disappoint, and he rounded up all the enlightened peoples of the world. Havee3333333's heavenly Proletariat, the regular Proletariat, Peasants, and all the animals of the world were sent to the next dimension
Havee3333333 then proceeded to destroy the world and all its inhabitants, and thus massacred everything. Havee3333333 teleported to the next dimension just before the world blew up.
In this new dimension, there was Liberty, Peace, and Communism. Havee3333333 built this new dimension to accommodate all its people, and then renounced all of his powers. Finally Communism had been achieved.

The end!

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

How many times have I died in this thread?

[TheRedAnarchist23]

But then TheRedAnarchist23 arrived and said that this dimension was not based on anarchist ideals, he is quickly sent to a gulag and sentenced to death, then he realized that he could not be sentenced to death in a gulag.
Whille he was incarcerated, Rafiq came to power and sent all who did not agree with his ideas to gulag, TheRedAnarchist23 after seeing that his greatest enemy has reached power tells other inmates about post #52 and how it explains everything, and so the prisoners, led by their will of finding the all-knowig post #52, organize in order to break out of the gulag and torturing Rafiq until he tells them where post #52 is, the prisoners' plan was...

[ColonelCossack]

to make everyone write shorter posts because they're better than longer ones. However, colonelCossack appeared and completely out of character slapped comrade Commistar in the face, then turned into an evil resurrected corpse, which then proceeded to tell everyone that;

[TheRedAnarchist23]

He was a...

Wait a minute, isn't comrade commistar dead?

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

He was a...

Wait a minute, isn't comrade commistar dead?

He's died millions of times; deal with it!

[ColonelCossack]

He was a...

Wait a minute, isn't comrade commistar dead?

A baboon!

[Vyacheslav Brolotov]

they sucked eachothers dicks, and one guy got mad and chopped off his girlfriend's arm

http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/103/740/c2c.png