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Leftsolidarity
7th February 2012, 18:12
This is an article I'm writing for my school paper. Can you tell me what you think of it? I don't know how I feel about it right now and I know it needs some work. If you see anything that should be changed just tell me.





School on MLK Jr. Day

January 16th was any old school day just like every other. Go to school, go to class, and go home; nothing special, right? Wrong. January 16th was Martin Luther King Jr. Day but you wouldn’t be able to tell at ***. Not only did we have school but while we were at school there was no recognition or celebration of Martin Luther King Jr.
Mr. Luther King Jr. was a major leader in the struggle for civil rights throughout his life and eventually ended up being assassinated because of his work. In 1964, he was the youngest person ever to be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for his nonviolent work to end racial segregation and discrimination. MLK Jr. has been one of, if not, the most influential people in the USA to embrace pacifism and struggle against racism and other injustices.
Many places, especially schools, give recognition to the holiday by giving the day off or doing something to remember the great work MLK Jr. did. Why did *** do neither of these? These are the kind of questions we must be asking.
One could see by taking a look in the halls or flipping through the yearbook that *** is a, by a far majority, white school. Racism, whether consciously or unconsciously, is not something that doesn’t touch *** and it manifests itself in different ways.
It can manifest itself through openly bigoted and ignorant language or it can take a more subtle route. It can be things such as an indifferent attitude towards oppression and exploitation that people of color communities face, victim blaming when it comes to things like police brutality towards people of color, or failing to acknowledge the holiday for one of the most influential black leaders in the history of our country.
If you talk and listen to the vast majority of people in this school you will realize they are out of touch with communities of color. This area is composed of almost all whites and, according to jsonline, *** has a poverty rate of only 4%.
With the conditions here being so different from the conditions of the communities of color, it is almost impossible for students here to grasp the problems and struggles that people of color deal with. MLK Jr. Day was a perfect opportunity for students to be educated on the struggle for civil rights by people of color. Instead, it was ignored and students left ignorant.

Ocean Seal
7th February 2012, 18:18
Too much glorification of pacifism in my opinion. Pacifism has changed meanings to mean almost nothing today but a liberal circle-jerk. Instead focus on direct-action and putting himself on the line for not only blacks but white workers as well when he supported the sanitation workers strike (which was primarily composed of white workers).

Leftsolidarity
7th February 2012, 18:21
Too much glorification of pacifism in my opinion. Pacifism has changed meanings to mean almost nothing today but a liberal circle-jerk. Instead focus on direct-action and putting himself on the line for not only blacks but white workers as well when he supported the sanitation workers strike (which was primarily composed of white workers).

I didn't really want to glorify pacifism but I mentioned it because that's what it said he won the award for so I put it in.

While MLK Jr. is the launching point I wanted this article to talk about the racist mentality of the school and the administration, using their ignoring the holiday as an example.

Sendo
8th February 2012, 01:50
I don't care for MLK any more (probably less) than any other black civil rights leader/champion of the 1960s. His holiday is the best we can get for an acknowledgement of the racial equality movement, though, so I don't say anything bad about him or the federal holiday publicly.

He did take a turn towards anti-imperialism and labor activism in his later days, for which I applaud him, but he had his bad points. He was a hypocrite of a minister (normally I could care less about a political figure's private life, but a supposed "Reverend" is held to another standard) and he plagiarized his work for his PhD and his civil rights speeches.

One might say that the ends justified the means but there are two issues with that. MLK, not just his posthumous estate, fought to preserve his "copyright" and suppressed recordings and re-broadcasts and transcripts of I Have a Dream speech (though it was public, not a private artistic exhibition. He was also chosen by the "man" to be the icon for the movement since he was the nice alternative to Malcolm X and had a penis unlike Rosa Parks.

All in all, I use the holiday to remind people of the often "unremembered" MLK who spoke against capitalism and imperialism.

****

Be more specific in your language "Many places?" what like, bathrooms and broom closets, Antarctica and Europe? Oh, you mean "Many institutions"

Be more specific, not less. This has nothing to do with fancy/non-fancy language.

Example, I hate the word "cosmopolitan." Does the person mean worldly or urbane or cultured or sophisticated or well-travelled?

Sendo
8th February 2012, 02:02
If you talk and listen to the vast majority of people in this school you will realize they are out of touch with communities of color. This area is composed of almost all whites and, according to jsonline, *** has a poverty rate of only 4%.

If you speak with just about anyone at our predominantly white school, you will realize that the average student (Ed. or do you mean faculty and staff and students???) has little to no connection with communities of color.

ed. CLUNKY TRANSITION

Our (Ed. county? district???) is # percent white (Get the census data!!!), yet only four percent is under the poverty line, according to XXXXXX.

*****

0-20% number percent

21+% # percent

There are many grammatical errors and not enough concrete data, no specific names, no interviews, awkward transitions. It needs a lot of work. I'm at a job right now and can't help more.

Good luck

Leftsolidarity
8th February 2012, 02:30
Thanks for the help. I'm hoping to interview an administrator and put quotes in here if I continue with this article.