Weezer
19th November 2011, 04:33
Thought I would never come back here, oh well.
Well, early September was a trialing time for me and my political beliefs. I'll keep the story brief. Basically, my parents are conservative, not to the extremity, but they're up there. They've never approved of me being on the left, but they can't stop me. Periodically, maybe about every few months, all tension breaks loose and arguments break out.
I'm not the teenager to hate my parents and blow stuff like that off. The very act of disagreeing with them politically gives me guilt. Basically, in early September, after that day already filled with depressing thoughts to the point of crying, my mom accused me of being some kind of cyber-terrorist and talking to "Muslims" online, how dumb my views are, how great America is because she was given a secondary inspection when she returned to the US from Sweden about a month before that, among other things like how I hate my parents, which I certainly don't. She said my internet activities like going on al-Jazerra caused the government to somehow blacklist our family.
I broke down mentally. That night I was woken up several times by the levels of anxiety I was experiencing. It was bad. Basically my revolutionary spark was shattered. And I can't say I really fully believe it anymore. I would like to, but I feel I need to learn even more now.
I became a SPUSA member about two days before this and attended an Occupy event in my local area. But even still, socialism, Marxism, whateverism, just doesn't feel the same.
So, I exiled myself from RevLeft. With the time I spent not being on RevLeft, I focused on music a lot.
My beliefs right now are still socialist I think, but it's just...not the same. I'm also still very pro-Cuban, but that doesn't really reflect any sort of tendency or ideology. I've come back here to learn again.
Well, early September was a trialing time for me and my political beliefs. I'll keep the story brief. Basically, my parents are conservative, not to the extremity, but they're up there. They've never approved of me being on the left, but they can't stop me. Periodically, maybe about every few months, all tension breaks loose and arguments break out.
I'm not the teenager to hate my parents and blow stuff like that off. The very act of disagreeing with them politically gives me guilt. Basically, in early September, after that day already filled with depressing thoughts to the point of crying, my mom accused me of being some kind of cyber-terrorist and talking to "Muslims" online, how dumb my views are, how great America is because she was given a secondary inspection when she returned to the US from Sweden about a month before that, among other things like how I hate my parents, which I certainly don't. She said my internet activities like going on al-Jazerra caused the government to somehow blacklist our family.
I broke down mentally. That night I was woken up several times by the levels of anxiety I was experiencing. It was bad. Basically my revolutionary spark was shattered. And I can't say I really fully believe it anymore. I would like to, but I feel I need to learn even more now.
I became a SPUSA member about two days before this and attended an Occupy event in my local area. But even still, socialism, Marxism, whateverism, just doesn't feel the same.
So, I exiled myself from RevLeft. With the time I spent not being on RevLeft, I focused on music a lot.
My beliefs right now are still socialist I think, but it's just...not the same. I'm also still very pro-Cuban, but that doesn't really reflect any sort of tendency or ideology. I've come back here to learn again.