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Leftsolidarity
13th October 2011, 15:33
Protests Sweep Across Country
A wave of protest has swept across our country and is now spread to other parts of the world. The protests started on September 17th when protesters from the movement “Occupy Wall Street” started occupying Zuccotti Park in New York City.
It started with about 1,000 protesters marching through the streets in NYC but has turned into tens of thousands across the country from coast to coast and has sparked protests internationally. Currently there are roughly 200 cities being occupied in 25 different countries.
Some have been referring to these occupations as the “American Spring”, drawing comparison to the Arab Spring, which were massive protests in the Middle East and Northern Africa leading to the removal of regional dictators.
Protesters have been subject to brutality and unprovoked attacks by the police force, including multiple incidents of pepper-spraying peaceful protesters in the face.
Some question the motives, objectives, and views of the protesters. While some of the views and objectives of different protesters may differ, the motivations for these protests are clear. Some listed causes of the protests are: corporate greed, wealth inequality, and corporate influence in our government.
With ever-worsening conditions, two-faced politicians, imperialist wars for profit, and continued attacks on the working class, people have started to become disillusioned from false capitalist rhetoric of freedom, equality, and democracy.
This is more than just some people gathering together to march and camp in the major cities of our country; this is an awakening. It is a show of the growing class consciousness of the people in this country. More and more people are starting to recognize the fact that they, and the vast majority of the population, are being exploited by the top few in society, the capitalists.
Right-wing politicians are claiming that these occupations are a form of class war; it most certainly is.
This class war was not started by us though; it was started, and shall continue, under the rule of the wealthy few. They are the ones to foreclose our homes, cut funding to our schools, send us to die overseas for their profits and then arrest us when we try to resist.
So yes, this is class warfare but we stand on the side of the many, the exploited, and the oppressed. Opposed to us you have the few, the wealthy, and the oppressors.
Closet to the *** area, there are occupations in Madison, Wisconsin and Chicago, Illinois. The occupation of Milwaukee is scheduled to start on October 14th.
If you feel that something is wrong with our system where the top few percent of society can own the vast majority of the wealth and where interests of corporations and profits come before the interests of the people, join us. Updates and information about the occupation can be found at “occupymilwaukee.org”.
We are students, we are workers, we are the unemployed, we are the oppressed, we are the 99%, and we are you.



I editted out my school name. I tried to tone down some of the anti-capitalist rhetoric and stuff so that it has a chance of being published because the principle has already complained about an article of mine recently. Could you tell me what you think? I'm new to writting articles and would appreciate feedback.

Smyg
13th October 2011, 15:52
I wish we had a newspaper like this, back in the school days. Why do you Americans get so much nice stuff?

Anyway, this is good enough, given the circumstances. :D

¿Que?
13th October 2011, 16:47
A wave of protest has swept across the U.S. and has now spread to other parts of the world. The demonstrations started on September 17th when protesters from the movement “Occupy Wall Street” took to Zuccotti Park in New York City where they have remained since.
Occupy Wall Street began with about 1,000 protesters marching through the streets of New York City, but has turned into tens of thousands across the countryfrom coast to coast and has sparked protests internationally. Currently there are roughly 200 cities being occupied in 25 different countries.
Some have been referring to these occupations as the “American Spring”, drawing comparison to the Arab Spring, which were massive protests in the Middle East and Northern Africa leading to the removal of regional dictators.
Protesters have been subject to brutality and unprovoked attacks by the police force, including multiple incidents of pepper-spraying peaceful protesters in the face (it would be a good idea to list more incident here. Maybe the bridge deception and a little research could yield one more).
Some question the motives, objectives, and views of the protesters. While some of the views and objectives of the numerous protesters may differ, the motivations for these protests are clear. Demonstrators cite various grievances, including corporate greed, wealth inequality, and corporate influence in our government and politics.
With ever-worsening conditions, two-faced politicians, imperialist wars for profit, and continued attacks on the working class and poor, people have started to become disillusioned from false capitalist rhetoric of freedom, equality, and democracy.
This is more than just some people gathering together to march and camp in the major cities of the U.S.; this is an awakening. It is evidence of the growing class consciousness of the people in this country. More and more people are starting to recognize the fact that they, and the vast majority of the population, are being exploited by the top few in society, the capitalists.
Right-wing politicians are claiming that these occupations are a form of class war; it most certainly is.
However, we did not start this class war (remember to use active voice as much as possible); it was started, and will continue, under the rule of the wealthy few. They are the ones to foreclose our homes, cut funding to our schools, send us to die overseas for their profits and then arrest us when we try to resist.
So yes, this is class warfare but we stand on the side of the many, the exploited, and the oppressed. Opposed to us you have the few, the wealthy, and the oppressors.
Close to the *** area there are occupations in Madison, Wisconsin and Chicago, Illinois. The occupation of Milwaukee is scheduled to start on October 14th.
If you feel that something is wrong with the current system, where the top few percent of society can own the vast majority of the wealth and where interests of corporations and profits come before the interests of the people, join us. Updates and information about the occupation can be found at “occupymilwaukee.org”.
We are students, we are workers, we are the unemployed, we are the oppressed, we are the 99%, and we are you.Some minor editing to make it more readable. Hope you don't mind :) Overall, good article. (Notice how there are less edits towards the end :thumbup1:). Keep in mind I am not a professional writer or anything, and others might have better edits. I do write reasonably well though.

Leftsolidarity
13th October 2011, 20:12
Some minor editing to make it more readable. Hope you don't mind :) Overall, good article. (Notice how there are less edits towards the end :thumbup1:). Keep in mind I am not a professional writer or anything, and others might have better edits. I do write reasonably well though.
Awesome thanks, I think your edits made it a lot better

tir1944
13th October 2011, 20:16
Why doesn't this article mention socialism/communism,Marx(ism) etc?

TheGodlessUtopian
13th October 2011, 20:20
Why doesn't this article mention socialism/communism,Marx(ism) etc?

I assume it is because his principal has already complained about his writing once.

Leftsolidarity
13th October 2011, 20:22
Why doesn't this article mention socialism/communism,Marx(ism) etc?

Because this is still my school newspaper. It's going to be hard enough to get this published with stuff about capitalists and imperialist wars for profit. Baby steps...

tir1944
13th October 2011, 20:27
I see...how come you mentioned "class war" btw?

Leftsolidarity
13th October 2011, 20:30
I see...how come you mentioned "class war" btw?

Because politicans have brought it up and I'd rather embrace it than reject it.

Threetune
13th October 2011, 20:40
I editted out my school name. I tried to tone down some of the anti-capitalist rhetoric and stuff so that it has a chance of being published because the principle has already complained about an article of mine recently. Could you tell me what you think? I'm new to writting articles and would appreciate feedback.

It’s a good lively piece for a school newspaper.

Communists and socialists have always had to "tone down" their work with an eye to what the state 'sensors' will do. Don’t worry about it; you stand in a long an honourable tradition stretching back to Karl Marx.

Don’t drop yourself in the shit for the sake of bravado or passion. Anyway, you could invite the principle to debate with you in the pages of the newspaper in the interest of ‘balance’ ‘free speech’ and ‘democracy’ and get yourself a few more pieces published and encourage the wider school community to get engaged in the debate.

Whether or not you get published, just keep righting anyway. It helps clarify your understanding of the world.

¿Que?
13th October 2011, 23:48
One last edit:


Right-wing politicians are claiming that these occupations are a form of class war; they most certainly are.
Plural/singular disagreement.

Leftsolidarity
13th October 2011, 23:53
One last edit:


Plural/singular disagreement.

Eh, maybe an editor will get that. I already turned it in.

Zealot
14th October 2011, 01:33
This is what you call a toned down article? Haha, you're previous pieces must have been pretty radical, great job!

Rusty Shackleford
15th October 2011, 04:29
try stepping around the word capitalist. anything openly criticizing capitalism with the word 'capitalist' in it will not get published.

as for imperialist wars, maybe change it to 'wars for the rich' or 'bankers' wars' or just cut out imperialist and say 'wars for profit where poor and working people are sent to die for the rich and the politicians'


something along those lines maybe?