punisa
22nd July 2011, 13:16
Do you ever get that feeling?
It sometimes haunts me and gets me kinda down and sad.
I have just turned 27 and I'm starting to notice how tremendously my world changed in the last 5,6 years.
I have moved to a big city and I'm trying to get by while all of my friends stayed in the small towns and are starting their families, some already have kids too.
I don't long for that myself. Sure, maybe once. But as of now I have no ideas to become a family man.
Still, even people I hang out here are in an almost identical mind-frame. They are all depressed because they are not married yet (guys included).
It has become almost impossible to find people who think like me.
Seems like I'm rapidly loosing all of my friends as they sail away to more mature serious relationships.
On the other hand I don't hang out with younger people too much.. people who are still at college are somewhat of a completely different world.. living with their parents and having little to no worries in life.
I started working very early on and have moved from parents even earlier.
Now I'm starting to feel as if I'm stuck in this strange gap between 2 different lives - the first is one of youth and the second of maturity.
People are anxious and this anxiety feels almost contagiousness from time to time.
My female friends have become hyper-obsessed with their biological clocks as the only mission is to find a willing male to procreate.
My male friends find it hard to understand that I do not wish to get involved in a serious relationship.
Speaking of relationships, I've been in one for several years and desperately need some "time-off".
As soon as I broke with my ex everyone jumped with replacement offers.
As if its somehow essential to my damn well being.. screw that, I actually enjoy being single and spend all that free time on stuff I like.
If I am interested in a partner then I usually fall head over heels for her and really enjoy being with her every moment.
But this also changed tremendously since my early 20s. In the last 6 months I have met 4 girls and each time it ended as a one night stand and nothing more then that.
People tend to become super careful about really loving someone in their late 20s I guess.. I miss that sort of naive feeling of letting go that was so apparent just a few years before.
I'm still like that, but feel isolated.
All I want is to try enjoy living my life day-to-day, but it's really hard when you are alone at it. Schemes, worries about future... everyone around me is involved in these so much.
All in all, people around me are changing and "growing up" very fast. This tends to lead to my self-forced isolation. Sometimes I really prefer no-company over any-company.
Sorry for turning a meaningful topic to a rant, but considering this is my very first online rant ever, I hope you'll forgive me :)
It sometimes haunts me and gets me kinda down and sad.
I have just turned 27 and I'm starting to notice how tremendously my world changed in the last 5,6 years.
I have moved to a big city and I'm trying to get by while all of my friends stayed in the small towns and are starting their families, some already have kids too.
I don't long for that myself. Sure, maybe once. But as of now I have no ideas to become a family man.
Still, even people I hang out here are in an almost identical mind-frame. They are all depressed because they are not married yet (guys included).
It has become almost impossible to find people who think like me.
Seems like I'm rapidly loosing all of my friends as they sail away to more mature serious relationships.
On the other hand I don't hang out with younger people too much.. people who are still at college are somewhat of a completely different world.. living with their parents and having little to no worries in life.
I started working very early on and have moved from parents even earlier.
Now I'm starting to feel as if I'm stuck in this strange gap between 2 different lives - the first is one of youth and the second of maturity.
People are anxious and this anxiety feels almost contagiousness from time to time.
My female friends have become hyper-obsessed with their biological clocks as the only mission is to find a willing male to procreate.
My male friends find it hard to understand that I do not wish to get involved in a serious relationship.
Speaking of relationships, I've been in one for several years and desperately need some "time-off".
As soon as I broke with my ex everyone jumped with replacement offers.
As if its somehow essential to my damn well being.. screw that, I actually enjoy being single and spend all that free time on stuff I like.
If I am interested in a partner then I usually fall head over heels for her and really enjoy being with her every moment.
But this also changed tremendously since my early 20s. In the last 6 months I have met 4 girls and each time it ended as a one night stand and nothing more then that.
People tend to become super careful about really loving someone in their late 20s I guess.. I miss that sort of naive feeling of letting go that was so apparent just a few years before.
I'm still like that, but feel isolated.
All I want is to try enjoy living my life day-to-day, but it's really hard when you are alone at it. Schemes, worries about future... everyone around me is involved in these so much.
All in all, people around me are changing and "growing up" very fast. This tends to lead to my self-forced isolation. Sometimes I really prefer no-company over any-company.
Sorry for turning a meaningful topic to a rant, but considering this is my very first online rant ever, I hope you'll forgive me :)