Hiding beliefs from parents

[LevDavidovichBronstein]

What are your experiences with your personal beliefs and your family?

I don't want my family to know about my beliefs, my mum is a typical liberal and my stepdad isn't interested at all in politics but would probably have a negative reaction to finding out his son is a Communist.

I am not sure whether to reveal my beliefs, and how to do so, any help is appreciated :D

[Hivemind]

My parents are fairly conservative Orthodox Christians who lived under Ceausescu's "communist" Romania, and are racist, sexist, hate other religions, etc etc.

They think that what they lived through was communism, think Anarchism is people killing each other, and that I'm going to hell. My mom also believes that aliens created humans.

I, being an anarcho communist, who is also agnostic atheist (I don't believe in a god, but I also think that there's currently not much, if any proof, in proving or disproving the existence of one, so I just live my life the way I choose and am not restricted by silly beliefs) who spends a lot of his time reading political things...I try to keep my mouth shut.

Every time the topic of politics or religion or something comes up, they try to attack me a lot, but they don't know what anarchism or communism is (much less anarcho communism, they think it's an oxymoron), so it ends up them attacking strawmen left right and center while I just try to avoid the discussions altogether. I don't like discussing stuff with ignorant people. It's pretty shitty.

[Susurrus]

I have two liberal parents. They sometimes use it to accomplish their ends "You won't do x(stupid thing they tell me to do)? Geez, you anarchists are lazy." but are generally pretty good about it. I do usually have to hide it in public, living in the south, but at school and with friends I fly my colors proudly. If you intend to hide it, I would advise you to get some sort of bag or suitcase and keep all your leftist stuff inside it. If you get caught reading something leftist in public, say it's research for a project or something.

[thesadmafioso]

You could always not mention it to them, that's the obvious answer that comes first to mind. Politics is in generally a topic that is easy enough to avoid with ones parents, and if it does come up you can always choose not to engage.

[Zav]

My mother is a super-conservative religious conformist, my father is a loyal Republican, his father almost Tea-Party conservative, and my brother a Superamerican Colbert-watching, super-pro-military, ultra-nationalist. Care to guess how my coming out of the Red Closet went?
Not well.

[Susurrus]

Colbert-watching

Roflmao, does he realize Colbert is making fun of Republicans?

[Zav]

Roflmao, does he realize Colbert is making fun of Republicans?
Nope. :laugh:

[TheGodlessUtopian]

Roflmao, does he realize Colbert is making fun of Republicans?

I doubt he does. Most people seem to have no understanding of the word "satire." Really odd when one thinks about it.

My experiences have been odd. I haven't directly told them I am socialist, but one time I wrote them a letter that, among other things, told them I was aligned with a socialist party. They are pretty thick headed though so I doubt they fully understand. They know I am political though, and with them being apolitical, I doubt they care. Really don't know why I haven't told them....guess I don't really see the point.

[Susurrus]

I doubt he does. Most people seem to have no understanding of the word "satire." Really odd when one thinks about it.


Still, it's kind of like thinking Charlie Chaplin is a Nazi because of Hynkel

[tbasherizer]

My mom is a social democrat borderline-liberal. You know the type, she'll talk about how terrible it is that those Africans on the TV program are starving but not make the right connections. She votes NDP for more liberal than socialist reasons, etc.

My dad is a vaguely anti-Semitic, anti-American pragmatic agnostic. He got me started on being anti-American and anti-Israeli, to the point where I would just hate America and Israel dogmatically (EDIT: Which I'm over now. I'm only anti-American or anti-Israeli in the sense of their states and national bourgeois interests). When I was going through a mystical phase, he told me that 'heaven is what you make here on earth', which eventually worked its way into the core of my ideology. Thanks dad.

They know that I'm a socialist anarcho-communist, and take a "whatever, son" attitude if I go off about imperialist this, reactionary that, so I usually don't discuss it with them. They undoubtedly think it's a phase that college kids go through, but when I'm the government, I'll show them!

[Susurrus]

anarcho-communist... when I'm the government, I'll show them!

wat

[CommieTroll]

Coming from a family of staunch Irish Catholics and Fina Fail voters I hid in the ''Red Closet'' for a year or two after being enlightened by Marx. After attacking any pro Capitalist statement made by my family it became pretty obvious. My family are still hung up on pathetic arguments that ''Communism works on paper but has failed in reality'' and ''Communists are evil and don't believe in god''. By now I think they just ignore any point I have to make. I'm not afraid of any of the ''consequences'' of being red, as long as I fight Capitalism and Fascism then I don't see how Marxism could be a bad thing. They're your family, they should accept you for who you are

[The Man]

My parents are both conservative Tea-Partiers.. No matter what, Never hide what you believe.

"The Communists disdain to conceal their views and aims. They openly declare that their ends can be attained only by the forcible overthrow of all existing social conditions" - Karl Marx

[Stand Your Ground]

wat
I think that was a joke.

My parents aren't overtly political, my mom doesn't pay attention to politics at all nor does she even vote fur teh glorius prezidunt. She doesn't care about what I align with in politics. My dad somewhat pays attention to U.S. politics but doesn't see any option other than Dumocrat or Repooblican. He doesn't know about my politics yet. My grandparents are the same as my dad but they vote on everything they can get their hands on. My grandfather is also somewhat anti-commie so I don't wanna say anything to them yet.

[Impulse97]

My dad was kinda 'wtf?' at first, but generally doesn't seem to care much. Either that or he's just content to let me do my thing. My mom's a typical liberal, 'good idea, won't work in practice, human nature, greed and whatnot'.

Ironically, my dad is a Vietnam vet and spent three years trying to kill the likes of us.

Once, many years ago when I was a small child and asked him what communism was he told me it was 'a hateful murderous ideology'. I think the only reason he hasn't objected too much thus far is because he thinks its just a phase. He seems to be getting rather apolitical as he gets old though, although being mostly center when he does care, perhaps center right on social issues like LGBT etc. etc.

I try not to commie rage too hard when talking to my mom and avoid certain words. I've found that if I say things like Imperialism (in reference to the US, UK etc.), revolution, class war and so forth she rolls her eyes and gives me the 'stupid kid, I hope to god it's just a phase' look. Then talks to me like I don't know jack and should just absorb and accept her liberalist wisdom and life experience. If, however, I speak liberalese to her, to disguise my marxist stance, she almost always agree's to some extent.

[thesadmafioso]

My parents are both conservative Tea-Partiers.. No matter what, Never hide what you believe.

"The Communists disdain to conceal their views and aims. They openly declare that their ends can be attained only by the forcible overthrow of all existing social conditions" - Karl Marx

I don't think Marx was talking about telling his parents that he was a communist, so that may just be somewhat out of context here.

[Weezer]

My mom thought I was going to shoot up my school.

My dad grounded me for three days.

I think the rest of you got off pretty easily.

[MarxSchmarx]

You guys should be grateful that your parents have such an invested interest in something as relatively immaterial as their children's political beliefs. It's a sign of caring.

[praxis1966]

I don't think Marx was talking about telling his parents that he was a communist, so that may just be somewhat out of context here.

Don't get me wrong because I'd never dismiss Marx's contributions to revolutionary canon, but he was kind of a tool bag in his personal life so I'd be wary of using quotes from him on how to deal with people. Same as a lot of other authors, Arthur Miller and Ernest Hemingway immediately spring to mind, it seems like he'd be insufferable IRL, lol.

My advice to anyone is that rather than preaching the gospel of class warfare to your parents, try and focus on issues. You can tell them you're a communist/socialist/anarchist or whatever, but in political discussions with your family it's much easier to find common ground when you leave out all the lingo and whatnot. I did this for years with my mother the tender-hearted liberal and in the last year or so after realizing I'd been right since I was 16 or 17 (I'm going to be 33 next month), she's taken to calling herself a socialist and is acting accordingly. She's a teacher and lately, she's become a union rep with FTP-NEA (who represent her) and is hell bent on agitating from a socialist point of view... If that's not a success story I dunno what is.

My father on the other hand was a much easier sell. Y'know, given that he was a New Left Marxist and marched against war, for civil rights, and dodged the draft back in the 60s... He also happened to have a grandfather who voted for Debs every opportunity he got so that helped, lol.

[The Dark Side of the Moon]

my dad pulled a gun on me when i came home with Le Capitale.
I'm joking(he didn't pull a gun, he got really pissed though), he got mad and tried to explain that communism doesn't work because of incentive. i said bullshit, then we had a long argument. all in all, he stopped being a jackass, but he still wont listen to me. and i plan on buying a flag of the USSR. good thing i have a separate PayPal account:laugh:
EDIT: MY mom doesnt care, and my brother still thinks the only argument that make communism bad is stalin killed 10 million people. he so intellegent :rolleyes:

[freya4]

Wow. I feel very lucky that my parents are both Marxists. They don't think communism will work, or at least not anytime soon, but they still feel very passionately about their views and occasionally go off on rants about their hatred of capitalism or the wisdom of Marx. They were the ones who actually sparked my interest in politics.
Now, as for whether you should openly reveal your views to your parents, I say you should use your own discretion. Don't be dogmatic or preachy about it, but at the same time never feel like you should hide your views just out of fear of other people's reactions. Besides, they're your parents. They should love you regardless. Just make sure you take the time to explain what you believe. Don't except to get a friendly reaction if you simply walk up and tell them you're a communist.

[Apoi_Viitor]

My parents: "You'll grow out of it eventually."

[A Revolutionary Tool]

I still haven't told them but I think I make it pretty obvious. It hasn't been like telling them that I'm an atheist, when we talk about politics I give the Marxist perspective and they just don't know that it's the Marxist perspective. My mom told my step dad that I registered to vote and his reaction was "damn Democrat." Then she told him that I didn't register with any party and they started arguing because she's a Democrat lol. My mom votes Democrat only because she thinks they represent workers but she's pretty socially conservative. My stepdad and grandma and grandpa are basically Tea Party nuts, my grandparents record every Sean Hannity program and then watch it together like it's a gripping crime drama. My dad takes to my views though because he's working class and hates the pigs more than I do considering how many times he's been locked up. I'm about to move to my cousins place and he is like a avowed conspiracy theorist, so all talk of politics with him just get kind of weird so I try not to.

[L.A.P.]

Two petty bourgeois Liberal parents, and their okay with me being a Communist. I argue with my mom quite a lot about politics and she agrees with a lot and disagrees with a lot. My dad just said "when you meet a girl, don't tell her you're a Communist".

[Leftsolidarity]

My mother is a super-conservative religious conformist, my father is a loyal Republican, his father almost Tea-Party conservative, and my brother a Superamerican Colbert-watching, super-pro-military, ultra-nationalist. Care to guess how my coming out of the Red Closet went?
Not well.

Haha I think we have the same family

[Agnapostate]

My dad was a cop, my stepdad was a cop, my mom's a whitewashed pocha with aristocratic tastes; it's low key a disgrace. :(

[Agent Ducky]

My parents are liberal, and I'd been openly fascinated with communism for a while when it became obvious that it wasn't just an intellectual pursuit anymore. They're tolerant and stuff, my mom is pretty open-minded but my dad starts stupid arguments sometimes... My mom doesn't seem to listen though because the other day she said that she thought communism meant state controlling all business/industry..... so she thought I was an authoritarian this whole time. And they wouldn't let me wear my communist glasses to my uncle's wedding. Lol.

[NoOneIsIllegal]

My dad calls me "my little commie"
I'm 21.
lol.

He said one time "You would of got along great with your grandfather, he was a big liberal" I laughed and gave him a "lolwut" face.

He's cool with me being active in the IWW (I don't think he's aware how militant or anti-capitalist we are, though I've mentioned it). He's been a conservative his whole life, but is one of the few who recognize the important gains of unions through history. He was a union member for 30 years.

When I turned 18, he suddenly let me be a lot more open and was more tolerant of shit I did, it was weird. I suddenly turn one year older and the floodgates of freedom came crashing down on me? We still rage pretty hard at each other on certain topics though, like Israel.

[o well this is ok I guess]

How does one "come out" with it?
Do you just wait until everyone is at the dinner table and just announce "everyone, I'm coming out of the closet (or iron curtain, whichever you prefer). I'm red!"?

But true story, my mom ran with the Communist Party of the Philippines for a bit.

[Sir Comradical]

My dad is a social-democrat and I think my mum's a closet commie because she says some radical stuff sometimes. My parents call me in as backup when they're debating some dumb right-wing guests.

[Rafiq]

My grandpa was a militant 'far-leftist' (communist, socialist, whatever). My dad's a member of the petit bourgeoisie... His political views are pretty stupid, seeing he doesn't care about economics, the only thing he seems to care about is hating Israel, etc.

[Die Rote Fahne]

What my parents don't know won't hurt em. They don't know about my politics, and they think i am still a christian.

[Catmatic Leftist]

My dad is petit-bourgeoisie... he has weird views, he's racist and sexist... although he does say that a regulated form of social democracy would be good. It's hard to communicate with him, though, as he cannot speak English.

My mom is a teacher, she has semi-left wing views, but she's just one of those "good in theory, bad in practice" type people.

Logic and reasoning skills are completely lost on both of them; they continue the same fallacious arguments over and over again; it's really no use debating with them anymore.

I usually don't go around exclaiming my views and donning the hammer & sickle, but I will tell people about my communist views if they ask.

[Leonid Brozhnev]

Mine was good, my semi-disabled Catholic mother doesn't care much, neither does my ex-con stepfather, probably because they're both poor as fuck. Hell, they even got a hold of a genuine 6 1/2ft Soviet Flag and gave it to me as a present, I hung it in my bedroom with pride.:lol:

[Aspiring Humanist]

My dad didn't talk to me for a few days because I didn't root for the American World Cup team last year

[A Revolutionary Tool]

My dad didn't talk to me for a few days because I didn't root for the American World Cup team last year
What the hell?! Why not?

[Red And Black Sabot]

It might help to take it issue by issue. Discuss your position on certain things that you already know you might disagree on till you feel comfortable enough (or maybe till you feel they're comfortable enough) to be fully open about communism.
At this point, my parents are fully aware that I'm an anarchist and a communist and I come from a military family. (albeit a fairly moderate to liberal one) It's great... We have healthy conversations about it. I might not convince them all of the time but it's rare for either of my parents to out debate me, so they usually just accept that I know what I'm talking about even if they refuse to agree. They just say something stupid like "well why don't you run for office?" to which I always remind them, I'm an anarchist.
That said, I'm still somewhat closeted when it comes to being an atheist. I mean, they know but I haven't been up front about it...
Anyhow... I guess what I'm trying to communicate is everyone's freakout threshold is different so drop little easy to except disagreements here and there till you've acclimated them to your more radical ideas.

[Ballyfornia]

My parents are pretty damn left wing if not quite Communist and Atheist too so everything was grand for me. All my brothers are Communists as well. so all's cool