What the fuck

[Fawkes]

is wrong with me

Why when I hear a fatal car crash directly outside of my living room at 1:00 am my immediate reaction is "Sweet, something exciting is happening"

Why when I was told one of my really good friends committed suicide I immediately thought "fuck, I already bought a bus ticket home for a different date"

Why did I have to leave to go to the bathroom during my friend's funeral so I could burst out laughing after hearing some guy snort really loud

I barely cried at my mom's funeral and I didn't even cry at my cousin's or either of my friends' and didn't even think twice when my grandma and grandpa died

It seems like every consoling conversation I have with someone is me just acting like in American Psycho by just following what I've observed to be the proper decorum for such situations, not what I'm actually feeling.

I do feel compassion and empathy and saddened at times, but it's really, really rare

there's no real point to this thread, this is just me ranting about why the fuck I'm a sociopathic douche cause I'm sick of this and I can't tell it to people I come in personal contact with cause than they'll never believe a single thing I say, so the internet's my friend in this case with getting this off my chest

[Political_Chucky]

Well, just so you know, I love you:blushing:

[Comrade Wolfie's Very Nearly Banned Adventures]

Well, just so you know, I love you:blushing:

I second this emotion.

[Sentinel]

I know your feeling, I'm like that as well; while I'm an 'emotional' person that feels empathy, I'm totally unable to feel grief. At first when it was older people like my grandparents I just thought 'ah well, it's a natural thing at that point'.

But then when I noticed that it was the same with close friends, my father etc -- simply no reaction -- I became a little worried. But I guess we're just different in this regard, and lacking the feelings of grief doesn't necessarily mean that one is a 'sociopath' otherwise.

[NecroCommie]

I suggest taking the myers-Briggs personality test. That would sound like pretty normal NT-, or "rational"-personality-type.

That sounds very much like me and my MBTI-type is "INTP".

[¿Que?]

I bet when you feel rejected or something, you feel pretty bad though. It might be a little egoism. Nothing to worry about in this society. Just try to learn how to feel. It takes time I guess. I'm a little like that too, btw.

[synthesis]

I suggest taking the myers-Briggs personality test. That would sound like pretty normal NT-, or "rational"-personality-type.

That sounds very much like me and my MBTI-type is "INTP".

Fuck that test. Fawkes, I feel you, bro. I probably identify more with the internal monologues on Dexter than with any other fictional character. I realize there isn't any way to say that which doesn't come across as though I'm trying to be super hardcore, so fuck it.

[psgchisolm]

I'm the same way, I wondered why I was like this but I don't rip myself apart trying to find out. I just go with it.

[The Garbage Disposal Unit]

Alienation.

[Blackscare]

Same way. Also, just not terribly empathetic in general, not just concerning grief.


I'm pretty okay with not being that great of a person in that regard, whatever man.

[Martin Blank]

Often a sign of Asperger's Syndrome. You might want to look into that.

[Fawkes]

I communicate nonverbally really well, it's just almost every time I exhibit empathy or sadness it's feigned. It's probably just cause I'm a jaded motherfucker, there aint any real disorder or diagnosis behind it, cause it wasn't always this way.


this sounds like the most pathetic self-pitying thing I've ever written. thanks for the other responses too, I got something out of a lot of em

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Often a sign of Asperger's Syndrome. You might want to look into that.
I had a friend who had that. Back in school I stood up for him when he got picked on. The way I stood up for him made me come off as feisty and completely nuts but people didn't fuck with him (or me) after that. I gained a reputation back then.

[#FF0000]

I'm the same way. I don't really grieve for very long and it makes me feel awful. :mellow:

[Quail]

It could be a coping mechanism?
When I get bad news or I'm having a serious and upsetting conversation I often find myself laughing, sometimes so hard I can't talk properly.

[gorillafuck]

You're probably somewhat desensitized.

I'm the opposite way, I get upset and have very bad emotions really easily but I don't show it if it's about myself, as opposed to showing emotion but not actually getting it. I can show sympathy and empathy with other peoples problems, though.

[Luisrah]

Well, I'm not sure about me.

I keep constantly thinking that if my grandma would die, I wouldn't know how to react. I don't think I'd cry, eventhough my mom would ''like'' to see me crying.

About my parents, I think I'd cry. I just don't know how. Once I dreamed that my parents were in the top of a building in flames, and there was absolutely no way out. So they decided to jump instead of waiting to burn alive.
I remember feeling horrible, crying in my dream, maybe I did also in reality. I woke up and everything was fine, but my heart was crazy.

[Magón]

I can't tell you how many times laughing has gotten me in trouble when hearing some sort of bad news.

[John "Eh" MacDonald]

I have a really bad habit of laughing every time I see polar bears swimming in videos without anywhere to go, left to drown.

[Rafiq]

Unfortunatly, I'm the same exact way.

I am never sad about things I cannot change.

But when I know someone who is being picked on, or something terrible is happening to someone, I try all my best to help because I do feel bad.

[9]

I can't relate at all to you guys. I've always been able to empathize with people very easily, even when its been disadvantageous - its completely involuntary. It seems like there's probably something deeply wrong with you psychologically if you can't, tbh...

Also, I have to ask... what is the appeal of communist politics if you can't empathize with other people? I mean, obviously self-interest is part of it, but if it was exclusively self-interest, then wouldn't you be drawn to, like, Ayn Rand etc. instead, or some sort of individualism or something?

A sense of solidarity with other people is sort of crucial imho...

[#FF0000]

I can't relate at all to you guys. I've always been able to empathize with people very easily, even when its been disadvantageous - its completely involuntary. It seems like there's probably something deeply wrong with you psychologically if you can't, tbh...

Also, I have to ask... what is the appeal of communist politics if you can't empathize with other people? I mean, obviously self-interest is part of it, but if it was exclusively self-interest, then wouldn't you be drawn to, like, Ayn Rand etc. instead, or some sort of individualism or something?

A sense of solidarity with other people is sort of crucial imho...

Well it's weird because I empathize with people really easily but when it comes to death in particular I'm just not saddened by it.

Someone moves away forever, I get sad. They die and I move on very quickly. idk why

[9]

Well it's weird because I empathize with people really easily but when it comes to death in particular I'm just not saddened by it.

Someone moves away forever, I get sad. They die and I move on very quickly. idk why

well in that regard I think kayl's right that its a coping mechanism. actually, I'm similar when it comes to grieving over death; you sort of have to suck it up and move on in order to survive. and actually, I've noticed I grieve even less when there are other people close to me grieving because I feel like it would make it harder for them. I think its probably a good thing, really.

That wasn't the impression I got of what the OP was saying, though.

[Fawkes]

Also, I have to ask... what is the appeal of communist politics if you can't empathize with other people? I mean, obviously self-interest is part of it, but if it was exclusively self-interest, then wouldn't you be drawn to, like, Ayn Rand etc. instead, or some sort of individualism or something?

A sense of solidarity with other people is sort of crucial imho...

I have no idea to be honest. I do feel a sense of solidarity, but it doesn't seem to stem from empathy, but I'm not sure where it comes from. I'm not saying I can't/don't feel empathy or sympathy, but a lot of times when something happens that would normally garner sympathy from someone I don't give a fuck at all, even if I may act like I do for the sake of not appearing sociopathic. Generally speaking, this is also restricted to personal encounters. In other words, any times I may appear to show sympathy on this website, chances are that it's real because I could just as easily not post anything. However, when confronted with something that is traumatic or something that would normally evoke sympathetic feelings and actions from someone in real life where I can't just walk away, I just act like I actually care even if I often don't. I don't think it's anything inherently different about my brain or whatever from birth, I think it's just the result of the whole too much too soon type thing regarding traumatic stuff. Believe me, I ain't content with it and it's weird that I feel bad about the fact that I rarely feel bad.