If you want to ask me for advice...

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

... this is the thread to do so.

Ask and thou shalt receive (a wise ass response)


I put the wise in wise ass. Ask away y'all...

[Ele'ill]

*obligatory wise ass advice question here*

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

*obligatory wise ass advice question here*
My advice to you is to not try and out wise ass me. Unless you are Tom Green, you won't be able to do it. So sit down, shut up and eat your tomatoes.

By the way, I'm really not a wise ass, or at least I don't think I am.

[Raúl Duke]

I'm interested in a few girls, do you have any flirting/dating/getting them in a relationship/relationship advice?

[Il Medico]

I'm worried that my outward 'straightness' (among other things) is preventing me from getting guys, any advice abbey? :lol:

[Pirate Utopian]

Can you do the thizzelle dance?

[Political_Chucky]

I have a question. Can women get pregnant from anal intercourse? In middle school, I was told by a teacher you could in sex ed and I have argued with the highest council of sex about this issue.:confused:

[¿Que?]

How do I get this silly girl to stop making asinine threads.:tt2:

[Jack]

I own the same sweater in 2 colors and wear one or the other almost every day, how should I diversify my style?

[NoOneIsIllegal]

What are tits and how do we see them?

[Magón]

Why would a Mexican be in the arctic norths of Wisconsin?

[A Revolutionary Tool]

Why do we keep fish as pets? They never do anything exciting unless their lives are in danger, you don't train them, and they cost money to keep alive...

[Manic Impressive]

When I shave my pubes I sometimes get a rash what's the best way to avoid this?

also agony aunt thread is a great idea:D

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I'm interested in a few girls, do you have any flirting/dating/getting them in a relationship/relationship advice?
Be romantic (things like candle light, soft music) Be dashing (bold but sensitive) And as the movie Better Than Chocolate says; lunge at it!

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I'm worried that my outward 'straightness' (among other things) is preventing me from getting guys, any advice abbey? :lol:
Well carry a large sign everywhere you go saying "Hey everyone I'm queer as a three dollar bill"

I used to have a similar issue at lesbian bars. They'd assume that I'm a straight girl and they got one of two right with my sexuality.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Can you do the thizzelle dance?
No.:rolleyes:

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I have a question. Can women get pregnant from anal intercourse? In middle school, I was told by a teacher you could in sex ed and I have argued with the highest council of sex about this issue.:confused:
It is possible but highly unlikely. Watch the movie Quinceañera.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

How do I get this silly girl to stop making asinine threads.:tt2:
Everytime you read one of her threads, smash your head up against a wall.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I own the same sweater in 2 colors and wear one or the other almost every day, how should I diversify my style?
Get some hoodies, they are soooo much more awesome. Make sure they are fitted.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

What are tits and how do we see them?
Well since you can't see them on the radio, try looking at my Avatar.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Why would a Mexican be in the arctic norths of Wisconsin?
I wish I knew what I was doing up here.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Why do we keep fish as pets? They never do anything exciting unless their lives are in danger, you don't train them, and they cost money to keep alive...
It is Friday in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, mention fish and I might puke.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

When I shave my pubes I sometimes get a rash what's the best way to avoid this?
Try lathering up really well with shaving cream, shave with the grain of your hairs.


also agony aunt thread is a great idea:D
Aunt who?:confused:

[Il Medico]

Well since you can't see them on the radio, try looking at my Avatar.
+rep

[bailey_187]

i want to watch denzel washingston MAN ON FIRE

i dno where my dvd is tho, where should i watch it online?

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

i want to watch denzel washingston MAN ON FIRE

i dno where my dvd is tho, where should i watch it online?
Bring it up on your ass screen.

[bailey_187]

Bring it up on your ass screen.

smh, i come here for some ligitmate advice

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

smh, i come here for some ligitmate advice
I gave you a smart ass answer. What'd ya want from me? For me to take anything seriously? I stopped doing that so I wouldn't be depressed all the time.

[Manic Impressive]

Aunt who?:confused:
An agony aunt is someone who you ask for advice with problems. Usually in newspapers maybe you guys call it something else.

[Il Medico]

An agony aunt is someone who you ask for advice with problems. Usually in newspapers maybe you guys call it something else.
Dear Abbey is what I've seen down here, might just be in FL though.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Dear Abbey is what I've seen down here, might just be in FL though.
We have Dear Abbey and Dan Savage here in Milwaukee.

[Jalapeno Enema]

We have Dear Abbey and Dan Savage here in Milwaukee.. . .okay, a Savage-type question for you; what's the best way to get santorum out of my favorite comforter (unfortunately it's on the beige-side; if it was on the brown side, no biggie)?

[Raúl Duke]

How can I be as awesome as Xochitl?

[An archist]

If I'm in love with one girl, but also with another one, what do I do?

[Bright Banana Beard]

Where do I find cute single girls in NYC? I'd like to get a girlfriend.

[The Garbage Disposal Unit]

If I'm in love with one girl, but also with another one, what do I do?

Honest, upfront, non-monogamy.
I know you weren't asking me, and it's not much of a smart-ass answer, but, really . . . why have a relationship based on the idea that you can only love one person, when you've got concrete evidence that there's enough to go around?

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

How can I be as awesome as Xochitl?
You already are, ese.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

If I'm in love with one girl, but also with another one, what do I do?
Cut yourself in half, then have one half date one of them and the other half date the other one of them.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

. . .okay, a Savage-type question for you; what's the best way to get santorum out of my favorite comforter (unfortunately it's on the beige-side; if it was on the brown side, no biggie)?
Tie dye that shit, ese.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Where do I find cute single girls in NYC? I'd like to get a girlfriend.
Well for you I'll recommend going to 53rd and 3rd.:rolleyes:

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Honest, upfront, non-monogamy.
I know you weren't asking me, and it's not much of a smart-ass answer, but, really . . . why have a relationship based on the idea that you can only love one person, when you've got concrete evidence that there's enough to go around?
You can divide your love and redistribute it amongst the masses. Me, on the other hand I'm personally okay to give my love all to one person. I'm sooooo Tammy Wynette!

[An archist]

Cut yourself in half, then have one half date one of them and the other half date the other one of them.
Why didn't I think of that?
Thanks so much!!

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Why didn't I think of that?
Thanks so much!!
I totally got skills, ese!

[Il Medico]

Why do some people call other people 's'? I never understood this, does it have some other meaning that I'm not aware of?

[Ele'ill]

lol

[Jack]

:crying: ....you've changed my life.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

Why do some people call other people 's'? I never understood this, does it have some other meaning that I'm not aware of?
Because I'm just like that.

[KC]

I was very drunk at my friend's house who was having a party. I was just hanging out having a good time and some dude out of nowhere comes up and tells me to apologize for calling his girlfriend a stupid **** or something.

Now, I have absolutely no idea what he was talking about. But I'm drunk, so I'm thinking "I don't remember saying that, and it's not something I'd normally do, but I'm drunk so it could've happened." Then again, if I did say that I'd probably have a justifiable reason to do so.

I told him I never did that, some shit went down and one of dude's friends puts me in a headlock from behind. My friend starts punching him in the head and I'm out. My other friend, who lives there, breaks it up and kicks them out. I leave a little bit later.

Is there any better way to handle this? Because I can't think of one. Ripped a shirt I just fucking bought yesterday, too.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I was very drunk at my friend's house who was having a party. I was just hanging out having a good time and some dude out of nowhere comes up and tells me to apologize for calling his girlfriend a stupid **** or something.

Now, I have absolutely no idea what he was talking about. But I'm drunk, so I'm thinking "I don't remember saying that, and it's not something I'd normally do, but I'm drunk so it could've happened." Then again, if I did say that I'd probably have a justifiable reason to do so.

I told him I never did that, some shit went down and one of dude's friends puts me in a headlock from behind. My friend starts punching him in the head and I'm out. My other friend, who lives there, breaks it up and kicks them out. I leave a little bit later.

Is there any better way to handle this? Because I can't think of one. Ripped a shirt I just fucking bought yesterday, too.
Did you have a glass bottle?

[KC]

No.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

No.
In that case, you use your drunkenness to trigger your gag reflex all over him.

[KC]

I don't have a gag reflex. My uvula grew so long that it touches my tongue so I don't have one anymore.

Besides how does that defend me? You're bad at this.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I don't have a gag reflex. My uvula grew so long that it touches my tongue so I don't have one anymore.

Besides how does that defend me? You're bad at this.
Oh defend you? Unless you're in Milwaukee, I can't.

I kinda understand I barely have any gag reflex. I really have to get my finger down my throat quite a bit to trigger it at all.

[KC]

I can stick my whole fist down my throat

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

I can stick my whole fist down my throat
You don't want to know what has been down my throat.

[An archist]

What if I want to eat kebab with fries, but on the other hand I want to eat healthier?

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

What if I want to eat kebab with fries, but on the other hand I want to eat healthier?
Make a kebab with healthier fries.


But what would I know about eating?

[#FF0000]

how do i play drums

[ed miliband]

If I wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy what should I do?

[The Garbage Disposal Unit]

how do i play drums

Start a punk band.
Seriously, it's how almost every drummer I know has learned.
As a bonus, since you're basically making it up as you go along, you tend to end up with a pretty unique styles.

[The Garbage Disposal Unit]

How do I calm my paranoia?

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

how do i play drums
You get a drum set and start smacking your face on it as hard as you can to a beat.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

If I wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy what should I do?
Brush your teeth with a bottle of Jack.

[Bad Grrrl Agro]

How do I calm my paranoia?
Just chill out yo.