Great sports quotations

[Bandito]

William "Bill" Shankly

http://images.icnetwork.co.uk/upl/liverpoolecho/nov2009/1/6/bill-shankly-300-53460656.jpg


"Some people believe football is a matter of life and death, I am very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that."

[Wanted Man]

"Soccer is a game for 22 people that run around, play the ball, and one referee who makes a slew of mistakes, and in the end Germany always wins." -Gary Lineker

"Professional football is something like war. Whoever behaves too properly, is lost." -Rinus Michels (usually simplified to "Football is war").

"You always have to make sure that you score one goal more than your opponent." -Johan Cruyff

"I only criticised him as a manager. I never said that he beats his wife or sells child porn." (former player and current pundit Johan Derksen on his "harsh" criticism of Van Basten as a manager)

"They are all spoiled, they can no longer be motivated by money, and they have a big and sensitive ego. Only a seasoned amateur psychologist can keep all of these eggs in one basket. But that vulnerable ego is also the ultimate instrument to inspire these gentlemen. They are proud and they seek honour, and they all want to win a price and accumulate status. Every World Cup is a stage to write history." (Johan Derksen on the Netherlands national team)

"We once had a coach like that as well. We had to stand in a corner and look at a dot. He lasted six weeks." (Willem van Hanegem on mental coaching in football)

"He's a bit like Ruud Gullit: surprised that some people have icons of Mother Mary and Jesus Christ, but nothing of him in-between." (former international and current pundit René van der Gijp on Marko Arnautovic)

"Am I the one who is so smart, or are you so dumb?" -Louis van Gaal in his standard way of dealing with journalists

"Amigos de la prensa. Yo me voy. Felicidades." (Friends of the press. I am leaving. Congratulations.) -Louis van Gaal upon leaving Barcelona

"When he starts bragging about himself, he has five orgasms for every full sentence. I can't stand that." -Johan Derksen on Louis van Gaal

"Apparently he was eating a lasagne and somehow pulled a hamstring - it has to be a world first." -Coventry boss Micky Adams on defender Andrew Whing's bizarre injury.

"For years I thought the club's name was Partick Thistle nil..." -Billy Connolly

"I'll be hanging around your neck in twenty seconds." -Arjen Robben shows his faith in Robin van Persie about to take a freekick.

“Before the match my daughter said: ‘Beenie the horse wants to sit next to you by the drinks holder on the touchline’. It is difficult to tell a seven-year-old: ‘This is the Premiership, I’m known as Psycho and I’m a hard man’.” -Stuart Pearce on his mascot at Manchester City

"We played extremely well with Beenie for the match against West Ham. He's come through our academy system, or rather my daughter's academy system, and he made the trip to Everton. Beenie got us a result today." -Pearce again

Commentator: "Did you ever have a lucky charm Graham?" Graham Taylor: "Yes, my wife. But I never laid her on the touchline." -Someone a bit less impressed by Beenie

"There's no problem with Jermain. I wouldn't swap him for Miss World - he would probably swap me for Miss World though." -Martin Jol on Jermain Defoe's future.

"I love Tottenham more than you!" (Spurs fans to their loved ones back home while watching Tottenham on Valentine's Day in Prague.)

"There's a mustard-coloured Peugeot in the car park, registration XXXXXXX. You've left your windows open. Chances are if your car is a mustard colour you want it to be nicked, but just to let you know." (Announcer before the Plymouth-Burnley match.)

"So Portsmouth have won the Cup, and I don't want to alarm you, but the last time that happened World War Two broke out." -Gary Lineker on the Cup final.

Setanta reporter: "So, Gordon, in what areas were Motherwell better than you today?
Gordon Strachan: "Mainly that big green one out there."

"When the seagulls follow the trawler, it is because they think sardines will be dropped into the sea." -Eric Cantona

"I tape over most of the player videos with Corrie or Neighbours. Most of them are crap. They can f***ing make anyone look good. I signed Marco Boogers off a video. He was a good player but a nutter. They didn't show that on the video." -Harry Redknapp on the value of compilation videos

“To put it in gentleman’s terms if you’ve been out for a night and you’re looking for a young lady and you pull one, some weeks they’re good looking and some weeks they’re not the best. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi. She weren’t the best looking lady we ended up taking home but she was very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much, let’s have a coffee.” -Ian Holloway

"A good horse is not necessarily a good rider." -Co Adriaanse on Van Basten as a manager.

“There was a woman in it who was quite well-endowed and two boys who used to get drunk and have a fight – it had everything for me.” -Ian Holloway on Dukes Of Hazzard.

”He’s a complete fruitcake, that bloke, isn’t he? We’ve got to be careful with him, he’s after the old crazy mantle and he’s going to win it hands down.” -Holloway on Stephen Ireland

[F9]

ABsolutely great thread, i hoped i had some of those to contribute;)

[Bandito]

Johan Cryuff

http://www.golnoir.net/europe/nations/holland/cruyff.jpg


Italians can't win the game against you, but you can lose the game against the Italians

[bawbag]

"If I wanted you to understand it, I would have explained it better." Johan Cruyff



"My parents have been there for me, ever since I was about 7." David Beckham


"I wouldn't say I was the best manager in the business. But I was in the top one." Brian Clough

[ZeroNowhere]

"No Señor, it is not a dancing school. Football is not for ballerinas."
- Claudio Gentile.

"Clarrie Grimmett thought a full toss was the worst form of cricket vandalism and the long hop a legacy from pre-historic days when barbarians rolled boulders towards the enemy."
- Arthur Mailey

"[on Harbhajan Singh] He's batting beautifully, he is the new Garry Sobers."
- Rahul Dravid.

"I think Sehwag is probably the best offspinner in the Indian team. He has a clean action and also spins the ball."
- Bishan Bedi.

[Bandito]

"So Portsmouth have won the Cup, and I don't want to alarm you, but the last time that happened World War Two broke out." -Gary Lineker on the Cup final.
:laugh::laugh::laugh:

[F9]

A bit late sticking , but anw deserving:thumbup1: Any more to be added feel free;)

Football is not just a simple game its a weapon of the revolution-Che Guevara(never seen proof of him saying it, but it seems like people think so)

[MarxSchmarx]

"Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee" -Mohammad Ali

[ʇsıɥɔɹɐuɐ ıɯɐbıɹo]

http://seriouslulz.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/1239821948740.jpg

[praxis1966]

Yogi Berra

He hits from both sides of the plate. He's amphibious.

I think Little League is wonderful. It keeps the kids out of the house.

Little League baseball is a very good thing because it keeps the parents off the streets.

(At a press conference) If you ask me anything I don't know, I'm not going to answer.

In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice, there is.

The other teams could make trouble for us if they win.

If people don't want to come out to the ballpark, nobody's gonna stop 'em.

So I'm ugly. So what? I never saw anyone hit with his face.

I'm not gonna buy my kids an encyclopaedia. Let 'em walk to school like I did.


Muhammad Ali

Boxing is a lot of white men watching two black men beat each other up.

Frazier is so ugly he should donate his face to the US Bureau of Wildlife.

I wish people would love everybody else the way they love me. It would be a better world.

I'll beat him so bad he'll need a shoehorn to put his hat on.

If they can make penicillin out of moldy bread, they can sure make something out of you.

If you ever dream of beating me you'd better wake up and apologize.

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.

(A poem he recited in interviews before the Joe Frazier rematch)

Ding! Ali comes out to meet Frazier
But Frazier starts to retreat
If Frazier goes back any further
He'll wind up in a ringside seat

Ali swings to the left
Ali swings to the right
Look at the kid
Carry the fight

Frazier keeps backing
But there's not enough room
It's a matter of time
Then Ali lowers the boom

Now Ali lands to the right
What a beautiful swing!
And deposits Frazier
Clean out of the ring

Frazier's still rising
But the referee wears a frown
For he can't start counting
Till Frazier comes down

Now Frazier disappears from view
The crowd is getting frantic
But our radar stations have picked him up
He's somewhere over the Atlantic

Who would have thought that
When they came to the fight
That they would have witnessed
The launching of a coloured satellite!

(On being drafted to fight in Vietnam and perhaps my personal favorite) I ain't got no quarrel with the Viet Cong... Ain't no Viet Cong ever called me nigger!

Any guy whose nickname used to be The Louisville Lip is alright by me, lol...

[RedSonRising]

Champions aren't made in gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them: A desire, a dream, a vision. They have to have last-minute stamina, they have to be a little faster, they have to have the skill and the will. But the will must be stronger than the skill.- Muhammad Ali


I am not God, but I am something similar.- Roberto Duran

My power is discombobulatingly devastating, I could feel his facial tissue collapse under my force. Its ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm.- Mike Tyson

[Coggeh]

Gordon Strachan has to be the funniest manager around :
Reporter: Bang, there goes your unbeaten run. Can you take it?
Strachan: No, I'm just going to crumble like a wreck. I'll go home, become an alcoholic and maybe jump off a bridge. Umm, I think I can take it, yeah.
Reporter: Gordon, Do you think James Beattie deserves to be in the England squad?
Strachan: I dont care, I'm Scottish
“Pahars has also caught every virus going except a computer virus and he is probably working on that even now.”
Reporter: "Gordon, can we have a quick word please?"
Strachan: "Velocity" [walks off]
Reporter: Welcome to Southampton Football Club. Do you think you are the right man to turn things around?
Strachan: No. I was asked if I thought I was the right man for the job and I said, "No, I think they should have got George Graham because I'm useless."
Reporter: Is that your best start to a season?
Strachan: Well I've still got a job so it's far better than the Coventry one, that's for sure.
“I have discovered that when you go to Anfield or Old Trafford, it pays not to wear a coloured shirt because everyone can see the stains as the pressure mounts. I always wear a white shirt so nobody sees you sweat.”
Reporter: Are you getting where you want to be with this team?
Strachan: We're not doing bad. What do you expect us to be like? We were eighth in the league last year, in the cup final and we got into Europe. I don't know where you expect me to get to. Do you expect us to win the Champions League?
Reporter: Gordon, you must be delighted with that result?
Strachan: You're spot on! You can read me like a book.
I've got more important things to think about. I've got a yogurt to finish by today, the expiry date is today. That can be my priority rather than Agustin Delgado.
Reporter: There's no negative vibes or negative feelings here?
Strachan: Apart from yourself, we're all quite positive round here. I'm going to whack you over the head with a big stick, down negative man, down.
Reporter: You don't take losing lightly, do you Gordon?
Strachan: I don't take stupid comments lightly either.

[Bandito]

Hahaha, "velocity"!!!! :D

[praxis1966]

One of the best sports quotations I ever heard was from some guy whose name I can't remember at the moment. He was from my home town and played [American] college football for the Florida State University Seminoles... I'm pretty sure he was an offensive lineman.

Reporter: So do you think this weekend's game against Miami will be a difficult one?

Player: Oh yeah. Miami's always a tough town to play in. They're yelling at you in three different languages down there: English, Spanish, and Cuban.

[chebol]

Bill Shankly (legendary coach of Liverpool FC):
"The socialism I believe in is not really politics. It is a way of living. It is humanity. I believe the only way to live and to be truly successful is by collective effort, with everyone working for each other, everyone helping each other, and everyone having a share of the rewards at the end of the day. That might be asking a lot, but it's the way I see football and the way I see life."

[Wanted Man]

"I'm not the next Special One at all. Maybe I am the Shit One."

Porto manager André Villas-Boas is modest about being compared to Mourinho.

EDIT: actual quote:

agnX9NOPiy4

[Niall]

Reporter to rangers manager (cant mind his name): Who's gonna win the Old Firm game today?
Rangers manager : I think we're gonna win 2-0.
Reporter turns to Jock Stein : Jock?
Jock Stein : Only a fool would try to predict the outcome of an Old Firm game

[Bandito]

"They can't be monks - we don't want them to be monks, we want them to be football players because a monk doesn't play football at this level" - Sir Bobby Robson

[Ingraham Effingham]

yogi berra had a ton of good ones:

If the world was perfect, it wouldn't be.

If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.

I never said most of the things I said.

You can observe a lot by just watching.

[wandnancy91]

I like what coach Doc Rivers wrote on the board in the locker room during half time break of 2008 NBA finals last game.
"It's yours, go ahead and take it."

[Davide]

My all time favorite quote is:

This is more alogn pro wrestling and not sports. by Ric Flair

[Atilla]

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. Jack Benny

I didn’t lose my marbles…I traded them for golf balls

A golfers diet consists of lots of greens

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt. Dean Martin

Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad. A.A. Milne

I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game: it's called an eraser. Arnold Palmer

Golf: if you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. Arthur Daley

If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of would be played far better than it is. Horace G. Hutchinson

Golf is a good walk spoiled. Mark Twain

May thy ball lie in green pastures... and not in still waters.

I've spent most of my life playing Golf - the rest I've just wasted.

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. Billy Graham

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. Jack Lemmon

A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers, neither of whom can putt very well.

I know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators. Gerald Ford

I can airmail the ball, but sometimes I don't put the right address on it. Jim Dent

Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them! Jimmy Demaret

They say golf is like life, but don't believe them. Golf is more complicated than that. Gardner Dickinson

Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick. P.J. O'Rourke

Man blames fate for other accidents but feels personally responsible for a hole in one. Martha Beckman

Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five. Paul Harvey

I'm not saying my game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced. Miller Barber and Lee Trevino

Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it. Robin Williams

[St Pauli Bhoy]

Some good ones from the past few seasons:

AVB: "At Chelsea, a sacking is just another day at the office."
Fergie: "He could have been killed"
Alan Pardew: *headbutt*
Gary Neville: "aaaaaaooooooaaaaaaaaoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooohhhhhhhhhh"
and my personal favorite,
Steven Gerrard: "Victims and survivors suffered not just on April 15, 1989 in Sheffield, but for over two decades afterwards with the shameful slandering of their actions by people who abused their position and power."