Worst. Movie. Ever.

[JazzRemington]

0OUV-zh7LL0

It's got Eric Douglas and Marlon Jackson, and a boot-leg Al Borland.

Post your worst movie ever!

[ContrarianLemming]

I wont post a clip from this film because it will melt your brains

it's called "The Ninth Gate" and it's about Johhny Depp who has been hired by a rich dude (whose secretly a satanist) to go around the world to find 3 rare books, he goes to 3 different places to get the books and figures out clues as to what the books mean and how to summon the devil

the problem was that nothing happened, about 90% of the film is Johnny Depp having coversations with book collectors and high brow talk about book collecting, at the end there seems to be a hinting that something big is gonna happen but no, the bad guy is killed before he even gets to summon anything from hell and it's ends with Johnny depp having sex with an ugly Franch chick who seems to be an angel of some sort

2 hours wasted, cried myself to sleep.

thankfully there is a second or two of side boob.

[Pirate Utopian]

Avatar. Fucking hell do I hate that movie.

[ContrarianLemming]

Avatar. Fucking hell do I hate that movie.

jealous

[Quail]

I wont post a clip from this film because it will melt your brains

it's called "The Ninth Gate" and it's about Johhny Depp who has been hired by a rich dude (whose secretly a satanist) to go around the world to find 3 rare books, he goes to 3 different places to get the books and figures out clues as to what the books mean and how to summon the devil

the problem was that nothing happened, about 90% of the film is Johnny Depp having coversations with book collectors and high brow talk about book collecting, at the end there seems to be a hinting that something big is gonna happen but no, the bad guy is killed before he even gets to summon anything from hell and it's ends with Johnny depp having sex with an ugly Franch chick who seems to be an angel of some sort

2 hours wasted, cried myself to sleep.

thankfully there is a second or two of side boob.
I've seen that. It was a bit of an anti-climax at the end, but I wouldn't call it the worst film ever.

One of the worst films I've seen was called "The Heartbreak Kid" about a guy who was basically just an arsehole to women, but the film seemed to want you to feel sorry for him.

There was also a rubbish comedy film with Arnold Schwarzenegger in it that my brother watched over Christmas last year, but I can't remember the name of it.

[Il Medico]

I wont post a clip from this film because it will melt your brains

it's called "The Ninth Gate" and it's about Johhny Depp who has been hired by a rich dude (whose secretly a satanist) to go around the world to find 3 rare books, he goes to 3 different places to get the books and figures out clues as to what the books mean and how to summon the devil

the problem was that nothing happened, about 90% of the film is Johnny Depp having coversations with book collectors and high brow talk about book collecting, at the end there seems to be a hinting that something big is gonna happen but no, the bad guy is killed before he even gets to summon anything from hell and it's ends with Johnny depp having sex with an ugly Franch chick who seems to be an angel of some sort

2 hours wasted, cried myself to sleep.

thankfully there is a second or two of side boob.

There are far worse movies, but yes it is pretty shit.

[Thirsty Crow]

it's called "The Ninth Gate"
I enjoyed the movie. In my humble opinion, was is good about it is that it subverts the conventions of the genre.

In my book, the worst movie I've watched ("worst" as in the most absurd) is Braindead, directed by glorious Peter Jackson.

[Comrade Wolfie's Very Nearly Banned Adventures]

Casablanca. its crap.

And Citizen Kane.

[Il Medico]

Casablanca. its crap.

And Citizen Kane.
I don't think I want to know what movies you think are good.

[praxis1966]

I wont post a clip from this film because it will melt your brains

it's called "The Ninth Gate" and it's about Johhny Depp who has been hired by a rich dude (whose secretly a satanist) to go around the world to find 3 rare books, he goes to 3 different places to get the books and figures out clues as to what the books mean and how to summon the devil

the problem was that nothing happened, about 90% of the film is Johnny Depp having coversations with book collectors and high brow talk about book collecting, at the end there seems to be a hinting that something big is gonna happen but no, the bad guy is killed before he even gets to summon anything from hell and it's ends with Johnny depp having sex with an ugly Franch chick who seems to be an angel of some sort

2 hours wasted, cried myself to sleep.

thankfully there is a second or two of side boob.

That "ugly Franch chick" was an IRL supermodel who was supposed to be Satan incarnate in the film, not an angel, lulz... I loved that film, but then again, I'll watch just about anything dealing with Satan (despite not actually believing in him/it).

[ed miliband]

Is this the "ugly French chick"

http://www.elle.fr/var/plain_site/storage/images/personnalites/emmanuelle-seigner/10496106-1-fre-FR/emmanuelle_seigner_personnalite_une.jpg

?

She's not even slightly ugly...

[Ele'ill]

Jerry Maguire.

[Comrade Wolfie's Very Nearly Banned Adventures]

I don't think I want to know what movies you think are good.

My favourite film is the hottie and the nottie. Cinematic genius.

[Aloysius]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCj8sPCWfUw

I haven't actually seen it, but apparently it's really, really, really bad.

[brigadista]

Is this the "ugly French chick"

http://www.elle.fr/var/plain_site/storage/images/personnalites/emmanuelle-seigner/10496106-1-fre-FR/emmanuelle_seigner_personnalite_une.jpg

?

She's not even slightly ugly...


shes married to Roman Polanski.....

[Nuvem]

Krull, Plan 9 From Outer Space, This Island Earth, Terminator 3 and Salvation (FUCK those movies. A 23 year long movie franchise with TV, video game, comic book and novel spinoffs and THAT'S the ass end of the series. And I use the term "ass end" with emphasis.)
Anything with Tom Cruise except The Last Samurai.

And oh jesus, Zone Troopers. Holy bleeding fuck that movie was bad.

As for the
ugly Franch chick... yeah, I have to agree. Not fond of the cheek structure or the pasty white skin.

[DaComm]

I don't really know what the absolute worst movie is, but one that comes to mind is Full Metal Jacket

[brigadista]

tarkovsky -the one where they keep throwing that stick...

[Bilan]

Indiana Jones 4.

[WeAreReborn]

I don't really know what the absolute worst movie is, but one that comes to mind is Full Metal Jacket
Hey I thought it was pretty good, showed the degradation that war had on the human mind.

But in terms of war movies the Hurt Locker is absolute trash. The most boring, pointless and seemingly pro war movie of all time.

[Wanted Man]

Casablanca. its crap.

And Citizen Kane.

Absolutely. Meet the Spartans and Epic Movie were much funnier.

[Os Cangaceiros]

Escape From DS-3 and Die Hard Dracula are the worst films I've ever seen.

Sadomaster (from Argentina) is also a contender, but it has Nazi ninjas so that gives it a couple of points. The whole film is up on Youtube, in case anyone wants to see a truly terrible film:

Truc7AbAog4

LOL "No more caresses for the pseudo-socialist! I want blood!" :lol:

As far as films where the producers actually had money/a budget, I think that Because I Said So with Diane Keaton and Mandy Moore takes the cake. Good god.

[EvilRedGuy]

I wont post a clip from this film because it will melt your brains

it's called "The Ninth Gate" and it's about Johhny Depp who has been hired by a rich dude (whose secretly a satanist) to go around the world to find 3 rare books, he goes to 3 different places to get the books and figures out clues as to what the books mean and how to summon the devil

the problem was that nothing happened, about 90% of the film is Johnny Depp having coversations with book collectors and high brow talk about book collecting, at the end there seems to be a hinting that something big is gonna happen but no, the bad guy is killed before he even gets to summon anything from hell and it's ends with Johnny depp having sex with an ugly Franch chick who seems to be an angel of some sort

2 hours wasted, cried myself to sleep.

thankfully there is a second or two of side boob.

You cried yourself because of a movie? Booohooo...:crying:


Avatar. Fucking hell do I hate that movie.

Peoples only say this because it was the last movie they remember (it was the one that cost the most and started the currently-going 3D-era), and its NOT BAD, its PERFECT.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCj8sPCWfUw

I haven't actually seen it, but apparently it's really, really, really bad.

Its bad and you haven't even seen it? :rolleyes: Just because a majority dosen't like something dosen't mean its bad, taste is subjective, Remember that

Anyways i must disagree whtih averyone here, you guys havent seen many movies obviously, not that i care. Though comrade wolfie has shit taste. Anyways the WORST MOVIE EVER are those fucking shity american parodies which aren't even funny, Epic movie is the worst ever and there was some others which comes after it, i think A Superhero movie was well done though, but not EPIC SHIT. How are you even supposed to know about any-fucking-joke or humour whithout knowing MTV and alot of other shit that gets throwed around randomly, horseshit, worse. :mad:

I allso think that alot of romantic movies are trash and rushed, Sex and City rushed, for exampel. :lol:

[¿Que?]

Land of the Blind (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zZmx09CKTo)

Fucking worst movie ever.

[ContrarianLemming]

I enjoyed the movie. In my humble opinion, was is good about it is that it subverts the conventions of the genre.



theres something deeply wrong with you.

[ContrarianLemming]

That "ugly Franch chick" was an IRL supermodel who was supposed to be Satan incarnate in the film, not an angel, lulz... I loved that film, but then again, I'll watch just about anything dealing with Satan (despite not actually believing in him/it).

I don't want to know what the French consider good looking

but yeah, Satan, that makes more sense.

you haven't improved the film for me tho.

everyones payin attention to my choice :(

Also, "The Box"
I left the cinema a few mins before it was over, it was to much, It was just crazy, not in a gorey way, but a "what the fuck I didn't see that coming"

[Quail]

The Twilight films are also pretty shit. I find it kind of amusing that they're directed in a kind of supernatural/horror type way which doesn't really work, instead of the cheesy teen romance they actually are. The acting is also quite wooden.

[Os Cangaceiros]

Land of the Blind (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zZmx09CKTo)

Fucking worst movie ever.

The little rant the dictator went on in the beginning of that trailer was pretty amusing.

[ContrarianLemming]

The Twilight films are also pretty shit. I find it kind of amusing that they're directed in a kind of supernatural/horror type way which doesn't really work, instead of the cheesy teen romance they actually are. The acting is also quite wooden.

I must be one of the few people in the world whose never seen it now.

[Os Cangaceiros]

I haven't seen it either.

[EvilRedGuy]

NO, i haven't seen the Twillight movies neither, and thank god for that. Some mainsteam crap.

[praxis1966]

I don't want to know what the French consider good looking

but yeah, Satan, that makes more sense.

you haven't improved the film for me tho.

Meh If you didn't like it, you didn't like it. I'm not one of those people who takes somebody else's subjective taste personally. I'll argue interpretations/analysis until the cows come home ( but after the Starship Stormtroopers thread I'm sure you knew that already). I'm an asshole in a lot of ways, but that's not one of them, lulz... Anyway, the rub of that movie is that the reason why nobody can summon the devil is that because he/she/it is always here interacting with people all the time already. That, and I think it's supposed to suggest that every one of us is capable of evil (not that that's particularly profound or anything, just sayin').


everyones payin attention to my choice :(

Bah That's just because you picked on a Polanski film. Cock faces (like me) who think they know everything there is to know about movies are always gonna come out of the woodwork to defend his movies.:)


The Twilight films are also pretty shit.

It pains me to the very core that I can speak from personal experience to agree with you.

Anyway, I think probably the worst two movies I've seen in the last year or so were Henry Poole Is Here and The Women. Since I'm too fuckin' lazy to do anything more, I'll just re-post the brief reviews I've written on other sites.



The Women--If there was a worse movie released in 2008, I'm not aware of it. Let's forget for a moment that this was a comedy that just wasn't funny at all. Instead, to find the real repugnance of this film, one must analyze it in terms of it's portrayal of race and class, issues which I'm sure are lost on all who count themselves fans. First, the only characters portrayed as respectable or virtuous are socio-economic elites, set against the stark contrast of the villainy of the simple-minded proletarian characters. Second, the film exudes a latent (or perhaps even intended) racism in its depiction of people of color. The only Latina is seen as a homewrecking tramp, just one more example of how for whatever reason Hollywood casts Latin women as Jezebels 99% of the time. The lone African-American woman is a walking stereotype, persistently loud and over the top. Beyond that, nearly all of the women involved are obsessed with and define themselves in terms of their relationships with men (even though we never actually see any of these men on screen), something which one would have thought the last 40 years of the feminist movement would have rectified. I suppose if one wasn't completely conscious The Women might be mildly amusing. However, I find it hard to believe any reasonably intelligent person would find this movie in any way entertaining. For these reasons, The Women was not only awful, but insulting and offensive enough that I seriously doubt I'll be watching anything starring any of the actresses involved (save maybe India Ennenga, who was only 13 at the time of production and consequently too young to know any better).



Henry Poole Is Here--Honestly, I really had high hopes for this film. I've been a pretty big fan of Luke Wilson ever since the days of Bottle Rocket, and have never completely understood why older brother Owen is the bigger star of the two. Having viewed this steaming pile of cinematic defecation, however, I must admit I find myself almost hoping ol' Luke never works in Hollywood again. While I won't get into a discussion of how each of the 'miracles' which occur herein, as they're most certainly easily explained away, what I would like to address is the disgusting air of superiority which HPIH's 'faithful' latently display. You see, the driving pathos of this film is that all atheists/agnostics are really misguided, wounded souls whom in some way subconsciously desire salvation. As any atheist/agnostic will tell you, this attitude is staggeringly condescending and insulting, and never has it been more prevalent in any one film I've seen than in this one. What's worse, is that not only are the religious in this film painfully unaware of their offensiveness, but the simplistic theology they present only serves to demonstrate their ignorance of their own position. Granted, I didn't go into 'Henry Poole' expecting a theatric recreation of the Hitchens-Wilson debates, but I did expect something a bit more sophisticated than 'But God is good.' Personally, if I were Wilson's character, the second time the wacky neighbor came on my property, I'd have had her arrested for trespassing and that would've been the end of that.

[Pirate Utopian]

Peoples only say this because it was the last movie they remember
:confused: I can remember plenty of other movies I watched.

[Il Medico]

NO, i haven't seen the Twillight movies neither, and thank god for that. Some mainsteam crap.
Twilight was really funny. Just because of how bad it was. Bad acting + bad Story= Hilarity. I finally watched the first two after my friend insisted that I did. I laughed the entire movie.

[Magón]

Pitch Black, and probably every other movie with Vin Diesel in it.

[kalu]

Well, I guess it depends, because there are different categories of "worst movie." There are those that you know are going to be bad (the F-level, such as Absolute Zero, a Day After Tomorrow ripoff without the budget). Then there are the B/C-level bad ones, such as 2012, which I thought was ridiculously awful, especially the three "in-the-nick-of-time" plane escapes. I could even like Independence Day for kitsch value, but not 2012, everything about it was just terrible. Finally, there are the A-level movies that manage to suck big time. I hesitate to put them in the A category, but basically any Tom Cruise movie. Since I saw it most recently, Valkyrie seemed particularly atrocious. Thank God they didn't force Tom Cruise to use a German accent throughout the movie, because that would have sealed the deal for me as the worst movie across all the categories.

[Bilan]

Anyone who doesn't say Indiana Jones 4 has no idea about anything. That movie is truly horrible.

[Os Cangaceiros]

Anyone who doesn't say Indiana Jones 4 has no idea about anything. That movie is truly horrible.

Yeah, but at least IJ4 had characters who were in shot and audible sound. Which is more than I can say for some films.

[WeAreReborn]

I hesitate to put them in the A category, but basically any Tom Cruise movie. Since I saw it most recently, Valkyrie seemed particularly atrocious. Thank God they didn't force Tom Cruise to use a German accent throughout the movie, because that would have sealed the deal for me as the worst movie across all the categories.
I didn't think Valkyrie was that bad, Last Samurai was much worse. Especially, since they picked Tom Cruise as the last samurai. Way to take a lifestyle embedded deep into Japanese culture and then make it westernized and riddled with Hollywood stereotypes.

[praxis1966]

I hesitate to put them in the A category, but basically any Tom Cruise movie. Since I saw it most recently, Valkyrie seemed particularly atrocious. Thank God they didn't force Tom Cruise to use a German accent throughout the movie, because that would have sealed the deal for me as the worst movie across all the categories.

I refuse to see that movie based upon two principles: 1) I'd sooner spit on Tom Cruise than look at him. 2) I'm just a little sick of all the Nazi apologist movies floating around recently... Valkyrie, The Reader (not that I mind looking at Kate Winslet naked, but she's kinda like Penelope Cruz, she gets naked constantly)... Give me Flame and Citron, Sophie Scholl: The Final Days, or Inglourious Basterds any day of the week and I'm good to go.

And I have to agree about The Last Samurai. Enough with the white man's burden all the time...

[EvilRedGuy]

:confused: I can remember plenty of other movies I watched.

I diagree theres just worse movies out there.

Anyone who doesn't say Indiana Jones 4 has no idea about anything. That movie is truly horrible.

I disagree theres just worse movies out there. And what do you mean about "idea about anything" Taste IS subjective, so shut up. Never forget that.

Movies which sucks: 86% of all those "american teenager comedies"(american pie, dodgeball, etc.) types.

[Q]

Clash of the Titans is probably the worst blockbuster movie of this year. I saw it the other day and the story is such a sad cliche. If you haven't seen it, stay far away from it.

Synopsis in a nutshell:
- Hero gets born, yet is orphaned
- Hero gets raised by loving family
- Loving family dies at the hand of a god
- REVENGE!!!!!!!!!1111111
- Oh, I need to kill this awesome big monster in order to kill this god that killed my family? Ok.
- Ohai there mysterious young lady that doesn't age
- So, how do we kill this awesome big monster? Onto the mystery machine! Ask the prophesizing witches!
- Witches: "it can't be killed! but wait, there is one way, but it is totally impossible... you need Medusa's stonefreezing powers" Hero: "ok, I'll chop off Medusa's head then"
- *Medusa's head chopped off after she killed everyone besides the hero*
- Mysterious young lady that doesn't age dies... NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
- Chopped off head of Medusa stonifies awesome big monster
- Zeus says "kthx man" and zaps back mysterious young lady (but not the loving family, what an asshole, but the hero doesn't seem to care)

The end

[Os Cangaceiros]

What I didn't get about COTT was that Zeus was helping Perseus, considering that Perseus's aim was to take out man's need for the gods, when it's established that the gods need man's belief to survive?

[EvilRedGuy]

A better thread would be if it was about the best movie ever, whining about the bad never cures wounds.

[Bilan]

Yeah, but at least IJ4 had characters who were in shot and audible sound. Which is more than I can say for some films.

The fact that the film worked at all was a terrible tragedy.

[graymouser]

Hmm.

Plan 9 from Outer Space certainly comes to mind. Oh, and Death Bed: the Bed that Eats, which I rented on Netflix after hearing Patton Oswalt's hilarious stand-up bit about it, was worse than it sounds. I think a lot of people's definition of "bad movie" is pretty lightweight, to be honest.

[Os Cangaceiros]

I like Plan 9. It's funny.

[Bilan]

I disagree theres just worse movies out there. And what do you mean about "idea about anything" Taste IS subjective, so shut up. Never forget that.

Movies which sucks: 86% of all those "american teenager comedies"(american pie, dodgeball, etc.) types.

Thanks for the insight on the subjectivity of taste.
NEvertheless, your opinion is shit. Possibly the worst of all.

[Quail]

Anyone who doesn't say Indiana Jones 4 has no idea about anything. That movie is truly horrible.
I'd forgotten about that one. It really was terrible. I was so disappointed at having paid to see it.

[Pirate Utopian]

Plan 9 from Outer Space certainly comes to mind.
Meh, I liked it. I was entertained.

[praxis1966]

What I didn't get about COTT was that Zeus was helping Perseus, considering that Perseus's aim was to take out man's need for the gods, when it's established that the gods need man's belief to survive?

Bah Who needs coherence in a movie that was designed for knuckle dragging, mouth breathing boobs? Anyway, the original was far better, IMO, if a little cheesy. In it, the source of conflict wasn't man's disbelief in the gods as much as it was a petty squabble between Zeus and Hera over infidelity (a pretty common theme in Greek mythology). Worst bit about the remake was, even though the original wasn't what I'd call great, the filmmakers basically told people who were fans of the original, "We think the original totally sucked, so we're going to completely change everything." Case in point: When Perseus and his buddies are gearing up, a metal owl that gets picked up and then tossed summarily tossed aside with the words, "Leave that here, we don't need it." That thing was a gift from Athena (if memory serves) and actually pretty central to the plot of the original. It was as if the writers/director were saying, "We don't need the original script from here on in so we're chucking it."


A better thread would be if it was about the best movie ever, whining about the bad never cures wounds.

There are two of those (here (http://www.revleft.com/vb/favorite-movies-t139177/index.html) and here (http://www.revleft.com/vb/good-movies-recentlyi-t142170/index.html)) going in the Film and Lit section already.

[Magón]

For a movie you know is going to be stupid, but fails to be funny because it's so stupid, is a movie called The Killer Condom. Saw it one time at a friends house on TV, and couldn't stand it. Not only was it in German, but taking place in NYC, but the whole thing was just dumb with no dumb funny stuff.

Also Borderlands was a pretty terrible movie.

[EvilRedGuy]

Thanks for the insight on the subjectivity of taste.
NEvertheless, your opinion is shit. Possibly the worst of all.

Fuck you. :D

[Q]

Bah Who needs coherence in a movie that was designed for knuckle dragging, mouth breathing boobs? Anyway, the original was far better, IMO, if a little cheesy. In it, the source of conflict wasn't man's disbelief in the gods as much as it was a petty squabble between Zeus and Hera over infidelity (a pretty common theme in Greek mythology). Worst bit about the remake was, even though the original wasn't what I'd call great, the filmmakers basically told people who were fans of the original, "We think the original totally sucked, so we're going to completely change everything." Case in point: When Perseus and his buddies are gearing up, a metal owl that gets picked up and then tossed summarily tossed aside with the words, "Leave that here, we don't need it." That thing was a gift from Athena (if memory serves) and actually pretty central to the plot of the original. It was as if the writers/director were saying, "We don't need the original script from here on in so we're chucking it."

Oh really? That was a pretty subtle hint. I was already thinking what the hell that owl was about :D

[praxis1966]

Oh really? That was a pretty subtle hint. I was already thinking what the hell that owl was about :D

Yeah, when I saw the owl show up in the remake I was thinking to myself, "Now what the fuck is Bubo (the owl) doing just laying around?" And then the filmmakers gave me the cinematic equivalent of the middle finger, lol.

[DaComm]

Hmm.

Plan 9 from Outer Space certainly comes to mind. Oh, and Death Bed: the Bed that Eats, which I rented on Netflix after hearing Patton Oswalt's hilarious stand-up bit about it, was worse than it sounds. I think a lot of people's definition of "bad movie" is pretty lightweight, to be honest.

This too

[NoOneIsIllegal]

Pulse

The entire world dies because of Wi-Fi.
I win.

[Reznov]

The Bridge to Terabithia.

Seriously, that movie was boring in the beginning until the fucking girl dies near the end. I became depressed for almost a day after seeing that.

And then it made me wonder why this is a kids movie.

[iwwforever]

Castaway with Tom Hanks, Booooring...that island needed some predators.

[Kléber]

Blood Gnome. Dude drops his camera and suddenly it can detect demonic blood gnomes. Something about another dimension and serving a perverted mother gnome. Could not stay awake throughout movie.

1dqGhbuqrUY

[synthesis]

Either Inception or Machete.

[A Revolutionary Tool]

"Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead"

Worst and most boring movie I've ever seen. It's a whole movie basically showing you that Guildenstern and Rosencrantz were worthless in the whole scheme of Hamlet.

[EvilRedGuy]

Inception was very bad. So was I Am Legend, I Robot, and that crap Cloverfield. and 5 more(alot actually) movies.

[praxis1966]

"Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead"

Worst and most boring movie I've ever seen. It's a whole movie basically showing you that Guildenstern and Rosencrantz were worthless in the whole scheme of Hamlet.

Ummm, you didn't get that from reading Hamlet in the first place?

[Magón]

Cloverfield

I don't think any big box office movie can get the "handheld camera" view correct. There's always too much shaking and it gradually gives me a headache. The only movie I saw that was from that view, which was actually good, and didn't give me a headache was Diary of the Dead.

[the last donut of the night]

the room

[the last donut of the night]

actually no its the best movie ever

[ContrarianLemming]

I refuse to see that movie based upon two principles: 1) I'd sooner spit on Tom Cruise than look at him. 2) I'm just a little sick of all the Nazi apologist movies floating around recently... Valkyrie, The Reader (not that I mind looking at Kate Winslet naked, but she's kinda like Penelope Cruz, she gets naked constantly)... Give me Flame and Citron, Sophie Scholl: The Final Days, or Inglourious Basterds any day of the week and I'm good to go.

And I have to agree about The Last Samurai. Enough with the white man's burden all the time...

though it doesnt mention it, the last samarai was based on a true story, cept the guy Tom Cruise was based on was French

[ContrarianLemming]

The Bridge to Terabithia.

Seriously, that movie was boring in the beginning until the fucking girl dies near the end. I became depressed for almost a day after seeing that.

And then it made me wonder why this is a kids movie.

I saw this and thought it was a kids film, by god that was depressing

still, rather mature for a kids film, I actually quite admired it for being so out there considering the audiance.

I really do quite like kids films that take things far, not just the family romp, but make the kid think about stuff like mortality and an afterlife, as the film did.
However I quite dislked the kid saying to his dad after he comes to terms with the girls death "But she was an atheist! She's going to hell!"
"actually no God loves atheists aswell"
pff

[Pirate Utopian]

the room
Oh hello, Yet Humanity Lives On!

Let's play some football, huh?

[Q]

"But she was an atheist! She's going to hell!"
"actually no God loves atheists aswell"
pff

I've never heard a more brilliant argument for atheism: we don't have to deal with the religious bullshit and get to heaven if we end up wrong anyway, win!

[timbaly]

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

[praxis1966]

though it doesnt mention it, the last samarai was based on a true story, cept the guy Tom Cruise was based on was French

Even better. That movie then corresponds to the entirety of American history... That is to say, there's always some misanthropic American being inserted places he doesn't belong, lulz.

As an aside, though, isn't that always the way, though? I've never understood the need Hollywood has for sticking Americans (or at the very least American actors) into stories that have nothing to do with Americans.

[GPDP]

Came in to say The Room, but apparently I'm not the only Nostalgia Critic fan here.

M. Night Shyamalan movies more and more are falling into the "worst movies ever" category, I find. Lady in the Water was a total snoozefest, was incoherent as fuck, took the "WHAT A TWEEST" meme associated with M. Night's work and unnecessarily ramped it up to eleven, and to top it off, M. Night had the balls to place himself in the movie as a future messiah that would change the world or some stupid shit. Talk about masturbation.

The Happening was shitty as well (seriously, the horrible horror is... the trees?), but at least it was unintentionally funny due to Marky Mark's off-tone acting and the hilariously stupid dialogue ("Hot dogs get a bad rap," "I'm talking to a plastic plant," etc). And Zooey Deschanel always brightens up my day.

Haven't seen The Last Airbender, but I hear it's his worst movie by far, with shitty special effects and terrible, agonizing acting. I do hear the princess has a hairstyle reminiscent of a dick or something, which would be funny to see.

This all from the guy who made The Sixth Sense, folks.

Edit: Behold, penis hair.

http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2010/192/2/d/Phallic_Yue_by_Kharaen.png

[the last donut of the night]

Oh hello, Yet Humanity Lives On!

Let's play some football, huh?

i did not hit her, i did not!

[redSHARP]

Turkish Star Wars, the worst movie ever. The real title is "the man who saved the earth" or some crap like that. It is a fantastic journey through the insane ass world of plot holes, terrible costumes, and stolen clips from A New Hope and stolen soundtracks from many films.

[Fullmetal Anarchist]

Star Trek V:The final frontier that movie was fucking awful. Then again Star Trek Insurrection is just as bad.

[Tifosi]

gNiiJ0JtBOQ

I went to sleep in the cinema when I went to see this:sleep:

[Honggweilo]

The 41-Year-Old Virgin Who Knocked Up Sarah Marshall and Felt Superbad About It (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1498870/)

first movie that made me want to kill myself

[praxis1966]

I'm pretty sure Mortal Kombat qualifies here as well. Good god I hated that film. I was forced to see it because I was the staff movie guy on my high school newspaper. I panned the shit out of it, and can distinctly recall being surrounded by the nerd mafia who demanded an explanation/retraction of my review.

[GPDP]

I'm pretty sure Mortal Kombat qualifies here as well. Good god I hated that film. I was forced to see it because I was the staff movie guy on my high school newspaper. I panned the shit out of it, and can distinctly recall being surrounded by the nerd mafia who demanded an explanation/retraction of my review.

Sad thing is, it's actually among the best video game movie adaptations out there.

[Scary Monster]

I wont post a clip from this film because it will melt your brains

it's called "The Ninth Gate" and it's about Johhny Depp who has been hired by a rich dude (whose secretly a satanist) to go around the world to find 3 rare books, he goes to 3 different places to get the books and figures out clues as to what the books mean and how to summon the devil

the problem was that nothing happened, about 90% of the film is Johnny Depp having coversations with book collectors and high brow talk about book collecting, at the end there seems to be a hinting that something big is gonna happen but no, the bad guy is killed before he even gets to summon anything from hell and it's ends with Johnny depp having sex with an ugly Franch chick who seems to be an angel of some sort

2 hours wasted, cried myself to sleep.

thankfully there is a second or two of side boob.

Soo true! I saw it a couple months ago and most of the movie was of Johnny Depp flipping pages and writing things down :lol:

[eyedrop]

Alien from the deep.

"`It's gigantic, evil and invincible!' boasts the tagline. Well, this alien dwarfs the original alien in physical size only. Although the film takes place on a tropic island, a few similarities to `Alien' are obvious, down to the fact that the heroine has to stand the last fight with the creature wearing nothing but her white underwear. No, I don't complain about that ;-) Anyway, the huge creature which can move under the ground is quite scary (but only until it stands up and suddenly looks like a cross between a senile robot and a lunatic crab), the characters (including a snake hunter, Greenpeace investigators, a not-yet-mad scientist and an unscrupulous officer trying to `control' the situation) help to develop an interesting storyline, and I cannot agree with reviewers who consider this a simple rip-off. There is a lot more to see, `Alien degli abissi' is not too bad entertainment from an experienced director (voted 6/10)."

From a user review at imdb.

Add in that the arm, which was the most you saw of the alien, was just the tip of an excavator spraypainted black.

Horrors of Spider Island deserves a mention as well in that it was originally a porn movie about a guy trapped on an island with 30 models, with the guy slowly turning into a spider.

The porn movie sold so badly that they cut out the sex scenes and re-realesed it as a horror movie.

There is also movies such as "Santa Claus conquers the Martians" which I don't even have to tell you why it's bad considering it's name.

[Diello]

I wont post a clip from this film because it will melt your brains

it's called "The Ninth Gate" and it's about Johhny Depp who has been hired by a rich dude (whose secretly a satanist) to go around the world to find 3 rare books, he goes to 3 different places to get the books and figures out clues as to what the books mean and how to summon the devil

the problem was that nothing happened, about 90% of the film is Johnny Depp having coversations with book collectors and high brow talk about book collecting, at the end there seems to be a hinting that something big is gonna happen but no, the bad guy is killed before he even gets to summon anything from hell and it's ends with Johnny depp having sex with an ugly Franch chick who seems to be an angel of some sort

2 hours wasted, cried myself to sleep.

thankfully there is a second or two of side boob.

I liked The Ninth Gate. The plot had its moments of contrivance, but you can't beat Polanski for an atmosphere of creeping menace mixed with old-world European resonance. Sometimes I think his banishment is the best thing that ever happened to his films.

P.S.- The ugly Franch chick was Satan, not an angel.



Horrors of Spider Island deserves a mention as well in that it was originally a porn movie about a guy trapped on an island with 30 models, with the guy slowly turning into a spider.

The porn movie sold so badly that they cut out the sex scenes and re-realesed it as a horror movie.

I LOVE The Horrors of Spider Island.

GAAAARY! gaary! GAAAAAAAARY!!! gaaary! gaary! GAAAAAARY!!!! GAAARY!! gaaaaary!! GAAAAAAAAARRY!!!

P.S.- The three worst movies I've ever seen are The Creeping Terror, Night of Horror, and Monster A-Go-Go. As a connoisseur of B-cinema, I recommend them without reservation.

[Tavarisch_Mike]

At least 50% of all swedish movies are crap.

[Ovi]

Iron Man sucks really bad. That and The invention of lying. And Titanic

[JazzRemington]

I honestly can't stand the first Spider-man movie. I worked at a theater that showed it for 2 weeks because it was popular and I had to work most of the days it played. Fuck that movie.

[KC]

http://www.revleft.com/vb/revleft/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://www.revleft.com/vb/showthread.php?p=1893412#post1893412) I wont post a clip from this film because it will melt your brains

it's called "The Ninth Gate" and it's about Johhny Depp who has been hired by a rich dude (whose secretly a satanist) to go around the world to find 3 rare books, he goes to 3 different places to get the books and figures out clues as to what the books mean and how to summon the devil

the problem was that nothing happened, about 90% of the film is Johnny Depp having coversations with book collectors and high brow talk about book collecting, at the end there seems to be a hinting that something big is gonna happen but no, the bad guy is killed before he even gets to summon anything from hell and it's ends with Johnny depp having sex with an ugly Franch chick who seems to be an angel of some sort

2 hours wasted, cried myself to sleep.

thankfully there is a second or two of side boob.

Dude, it wasn't an action movie. You expected an action movie. It's not. Get over it.

It's a pretty damn good movie, IMO. Sort of reminds me of Eyes Wide Shut, for some reason.

[praxis1966]

It's a pretty damn good movie, IMO. Sort of reminds me of Eyes Wide Shut, for some reason.

That's because Kubrick and Polanski, IMO, have a rather similar directorial style. They're both very methodical, deliberate, and kind of cold.

Anyway, I just saw what could possibly top the list here. The Woman forced me to sit through Cop Out last night.

[KC]

That's because Kubrick and Polanski, IMO, have a rather similar directorial style. They're both very methodical, deliberate, and kind of cold.I don't see how they're similar at all, really. Kubrick is a god, Polanski is MEHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

I think it's just the pacing of the films that's similar, as well as the fact that they're both about rich people's stupid hobbies and take place in huge mansions and whatnot.

[Magón]

The Wolfman (new one) sucked pretty hard. Though Anthony Hopkins for what it was, was good in it. I don't think I like Benicio as an Englishman, he should stay Latin. ;)

[Os Cangaceiros]

BDT was awful in the Wolfman. Blunt, Weaving and Hopkins were all at least adequate in their roles, but Del Toro delivered his lines like he was reading off fucking cue cards.

That movie was a huge disappointment for me.

[Magón]

I felt the love story they tried to add between Del Toro and Blunt really was a train wreck and a half. Though I did like the scene where Hopkins and Blunt meet at the staircase and Hopkins just stares at her, eating a piece of fruit or something. (BEST SCENE IN THE WHOLE MOVIE!)

[praxis1966]

I just saw Hereafter this evening and I'm pretty sure that qualifies for inclusion as well. It definitely taught me to trust my instincts about films. I wasn't particularly interested based on the trailer, but I figured, hey, it's Clint Eastwood directing Matt Damon and Bryce Dallas Howard so it can't be all bad.

Christ was I wrong. I turned out to be nearly two and a half hours of two dimensional characters mumbling and moping and absolutely nothing happening. To top it off, the ending was completely contrived and forced, almost like Eastwood woke up and thought, "Hey, there's no fuckin' plot here... Guess I gotta stick one in around the 120 minute mark so I can get this thing finished." Absolutely gawdafull. What's worse is I felt completely unsympathetically toward any of the characters, yet there were actually people weeping in the audience around me. Some of the film's events were supposed to be surprising, guessing by the shocked gasps of the rest of the audience I'm assuming that was the intended effect, yet somehow I saw each and every one coming a mile off. What little did happen in Hereafter was totally predictable. Then, when it was finished there was a pretty sizable applause, and the whole time I'm just thinking, "You can't be fucking serious."

What a waste of time a $25 that was... And all because for some bizarre reason I've yet been unable to talk The Woman into seeing The Town.

[Os Cangaceiros]

Yeah, I haven't really been all the impressed with Eastwood's latest films, although Gran Torino was a little amusing, just because of the fact that it features a grumpy Eastwood wandering around muttering racial epithets for an entire film, most of which I had never heard of (such as "zipperhead", LOL).

[praxis1966]

Well, I'd heard of most of the slurs Eastwood used in Gran Torino, but that's what I get for growing up in the Deep South. Plus, despite the fact that both my father and grandfather were leftists their tastes in jokes were a little what you'd call 'off color,' so I got to hear a lot of the old skool ones growing up that nobody uses anymore. The funniest bit about that movie to me was the way he managed to work one into damned near every sentence and his neighbors just ignored it, lulz... I think the sister may have even liked being called "dragon lady." lmao