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Angry Young Man
24th July 2009, 12:31
AN ESSAY CONCERNING CHILDISM AND THE SOCIALIST MOVEMENT

It cannot be denied that a socialist society has an obligation to protect the best interests of coming generations. This is why the Socialist Workers' Party contains in its manifesto radical educational and childcare plans.

However, this has been clearly misunderstood by other left groups - those with markedly less understanding of Marxism than ourselves. On the 19th of July, members of the East Birmingham branch of the Socialist party joined a picketline outside a public park in Redditch recently sold by Birmingham City Council to Persimmon for a housing development.

The Chair of East Birmingham SP branch, Rick Rawls, said, that, 'if the children of Redditch, who have little enough as it is, lose this park, with the lack of prospects capitalism offers, their lives would just be Dickensian.'

Mr Rawls has clearly not paid attention where Lenin said that it is a patronising and gravely offensive assumption that children like fun. Two of the young parents in the party told me the story of their seven-year-old son's last two birthday parties. For his sixth, they turned their house into a pirate ship, donned Johnny Depp-style costumes and swashbuckled around, leading the children in games like Captain's coming and baking a Blackbeard cake. For his seventh, they organised history seminars and debating groups, which was much more enjoyed by all of the children attending - so much so that two of their friends are scrapping the pinata and cancelling their reservation at the playhouse in exchange for a lecture from a professor of Economics at the LSE.

I have also been told ad infinitum of parents whose children complain to them of teachers who use entertainment to interfere with actual education. Many try to adjust this by listening to Radio 4 until bed, but this is just more proof that the capitalist superstructure cannot provide a decent education. Along with a lack of investment and overcrowding, fun in the classroom is yet more mould on the decay of the capitalist educational system

To conclude, childism, or the belief that children have an instinct towards fun or enjoyment is the most unacknowledged and possibly the most harmful prejudice that tears the proletariat. This bigotry must be acknowledged, and this is why we are the only major left- group to have a six-year-old on our executive committee

Trystan Mochanee-Glottalstop, aged 37 and 7/8

COMMENTS:
Totally agree, man. An SP'er was telling me about his 'childish' delight at bouncy castles. I wasted no time in telling him the rampant mispuery of his statement
-Sam, Glasgow

Thankyou for this wonderful article. Having spent four years at Harrow I learned instinctively to not have fun. Not only this but I learned that dry bookishness and apostasising was the true direction to happiness. I have never seen a child entertained by such things as fun fayres or pinatas. Should I see such an occurence, I will walk over to the child or children and inform them that true happiness is in the pages of Marx, not in some brightly-coloured papier mache donkey that you hit with a stick until it breaks, loosing several bags of confections. Then I chastise the parents, being sure to lecture them of how pinata-beating is a reactionary religious practise. Should I see enjoyment being had at a fayre, I shall stand atop the main attraction with a megaphone and educate those of how they are a political tool used to kill rebellion and discontent with kindness, telling them not to take the boon
-Robert Kindles, London


Thoughts, other than there being more significant groups and people to satirise than the SWP?

Sam_b
24th July 2009, 12:36
This is just trolling and should be closed.

Angry Young Man
24th July 2009, 12:43
Satirise, v. To inflate the negative characteristics of one's opponent in order to make them seem bankrupt or ridiculous.

But thanks for the totally miserable response, mind. Most people try to hide their type after they've had the piss taken out of them.

Sam_b
24th July 2009, 12:46
Dress it up all you want, this thread is purely to instigate a reaction and in the most petty of ways.

Angry Young Man
24th July 2009, 12:57
It might as well be when you're so loath to original thought.

AlMack
24th July 2009, 13:56
hahaha the response says it all

Pogue
24th July 2009, 14:22
I don't understand the context?

Killfacer
24th July 2009, 19:25
:lol:

Angry Young Man
24th July 2009, 22:27
I don't understand the context?
Sam was acting all Mother Superior, so I construed that he was forbidden as a child to bounce on a bouncy castle.

ls
24th July 2009, 22:42
:lol: I'd totally rep this!

ÑóẊîöʼn
24th July 2009, 22:56
I lol'd.

Do one for the technocrats! (because Sam_b is too humourless to ask)

Angry Young Man
24th July 2009, 23:11
I don't know about technos, and they seem like pretty decent folks. I could do one for the CPGB if you like. Just shout out suggestions.

ls
24th July 2009, 23:27
Aw come on, do one for the technocrats.

ÑóẊîöʼn
25th July 2009, 02:22
I don't know about technos, and they seem like pretty decent folks.

Simply take all the wild accusations and baseless stereotypes that have been thrown at us, crank every dial all the way up to 11, and then subvert (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SubvertedTrope), avert (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AvertedTrope), or play them straight (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Trope) for maximum humorous effect. Popular ones include "technocrats are nerds", "technocrats are anarchists in white coats", "technocrats want robots/AIs to run everything", "technocrats want scientists and engineers to rule the world", "technocrats are all transhumanists", "technocrats are more machine than man" etc etc.

Then work your magic. Don't be afraid to put in some kind of subtext or commentary of your own.

Killfacer
25th July 2009, 02:27
You see noxion covering the tracks of his technocrat comrades? In reality they are all borg hive mind freaks who are connected by wireless internet to the mother brain (a really advanced computer system) who want to assimilate you into their "brotherhood".

ÑóẊîöʼn
25th July 2009, 04:21
[what the hell, I'll play along]


You see noxion covering the tracks of his technocrat comrades? In reality they are all borg hive mind freaks who are connected by wireless internet to the mother brain (a really advanced computer system) who want to assimilate you into their "brotherhood".

You can't stop us, even if you tell everyone. They'll think you're mad. And in a way, they would be right.

ls
25th July 2009, 08:40
And they believe machines must replace the workers!

I call you all to the fantastic clip from A bug's life:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120623/quotes


[a leaf falls in front of one of the worker ants in the food line]
Worker Ant #1: I'm lost! Where's the line? It just went away. What do I do? What do I do?
Worker Ant #2: Help!
Worker Ant #3: We'll be stuck here forever!
Mr. Soil: Do not panic, do not panic. We are trained professionals. Now, stay calm. We are going around the leaf.
Worker Ant #1: Around the leaf. I-I-I don't think we can do that.
Mr. Soil: Oh, nonsense. This is nothing compared to the twig of '93.


If the worker ants can't do it, how can a machine know how to do it?!!??!

As Bertrand Russell would say IT'S ALL TOO LIKELY TO COME TRUE!

Angry Young Man
25th July 2009, 10:16
Simply take all the wild accusations and baseless stereotypes that have been thrown at us, crank every dial all the way up to 11, and then subvert (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SubvertedTrope), avert (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AvertedTrope), or play them straight (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Trope) for maximum humorous effect. Popular ones include "technocrats are nerds", "technocrats are anarchists in white coats", "technocrats want robots/AIs to run everything", "technocrats want scientists and engineers to rule the world", "technocrats are all transhumanists", "technocrats are more machine than man" etc etc.

Then work your magic. Don't be afraid to put in some kind of subtext or commentary of your own.

How do I put in a subtext or commentary of my own when all I know is that they think that the way to design an egalitarian society is through technology - something which I can't really contest because I'm not a kibbutz-dwelling anarchist? I found the zeitgeist a bit weird. Are they technos? I'm not the sodding Ask Jeeves of satirists. I only did the SWP one because Sam was being such a nobhead. And none of you've said what you like about it! You haven't even picked up the name of the journalist!

Sam_b
25th July 2009, 20:16
because Sam was being such a nobhead

If you want to throw your toys out of the pram for me challenging your sexist use of language, so be it.

Sarah Palin
26th July 2009, 03:55
I didn't read one word after "childism" because of how much the quantity of "isms' there are annoys me.

ÑóẊîöʼn
26th July 2009, 04:17
How do I put in a subtext or commentary of my own when all I know is that they think that the way to design an egalitarian society is through technology

Not quite. The basic idea behind technocracy is that the scarcity of consumables can be effectively abolished through scientific management of the overall technical aspects of a society, if certain conditions are met.


- something which I can't really contest because I'm not a kibbutz-dwelling anarchist?Which is why I recommended playing the stereotypes and false accusations for laughs.


I found the zeitgeist a bit weird. Are they technos?I'm not intimately familiar with them. What did you find weird?


I'm not the sodding Ask Jeeves of satirists. I only did the SWP one because Sam was being such a nobhead. And none of you've said what you like about it! You haven't even picked up the name of the journalist!Hey man, chill out. If you don't feel like doing it then that's fine, and you should take some pride in the fact that ls and I found it funny and want you to write more.

Angry Young Man
26th July 2009, 17:25
I am, but I'm not on tap.

Also, Childism was in the title. How can you tell that there were too many -isms only by the title? Do you lose patience is somebody writes jism? Oh those crazy jists!

And in no way am I throwing my toys out of the pram. I didn't have toys in my pram because my parents weren't bourgeois mispuerists like yourself!
:tt2:

Pirate Utopian
26th July 2009, 17:41
lol, especially the second comment. :lol: