If you're autistic, does it frustrate you...

[benhur]

...when people expect you to:

#1 Lead a 'normal' life, socialize and all that, when they know that your condition hinders these things more than it helps?

#2 Make fun of your poor motor skills even when you tell them of your condition over and over?

#3 Expect great academic results, disregarding your condition?


How do you handle such people? Trouble is, sometimes even well-meaning people tend to annoy you with awkward questions over and over, and this is especially frustrating when they know about your problem. I can understand strangers doing this -- ignorance is their excuse -- but it hurts when people who claim to 'love' you (including friends and families) do this many times over.

[Pirate Utopian]

No. It frustrates me when people think I cant do that.

[Dr Mindbender]

What frustrates me even more, i believe that i may have an autistic spectrum disorder but the health authorities are so unprepared i can't even get a diagnosis.

[Panda Tse Tung]

I don't get #3, i thought autism wasn't impairing on ones intelligence? Asperger and PDDNOS that is, not classical autism.
I'm not autistic myself (hence why I'm not answering any questions), just curious.

[Angry Young Man]

As an aspergers, I find people frustrating.

[LOLseph Stalin]

I was once thought to have Autism or Aspergers myself. I went in for some testing, but I was never formally diagnosed.

[Audeamus]

Hmmm, I am an Aspie (formal diagnosis and everything), but I can't say I have ever encountered such situations. People don't seem to expect much from me academically or socially. Not that I would hear terribly much about #3, my grades are fairly good.

[Sean]

A groundbreaking study suggests people with autism-spectrum disorders such as Asperger's do not lack empathy – rather, they feel others' emotions too intensely to cope.
People with Asperger's syndrome, a high functioning form of autism, are often stereotyped as distant loners or robotic geeks. But what if what looks like coldness to the outside world is a response to being overwhelmed by emotion – an excess of empathy, not a lack of it?
This idea resonates with many people suffering from autism-spectrum disorders and their families. It also jibes with the "intense world" theory, a new way of thinking about the nature of autism.
As posited by Henry and Kamila Markram of the Swiss Federal Institute of Technology in Lausanne, the theory suggests that the fundamental problem in autism-spectrum disorders is not a social deficiency but, rather, a hypersensitivity to experience, which includes an overwhelming fear response.

Asperger's theory does about-face (http://www.thestar.com/article/633688)

[Angry Young Man]

I think, given all the opposite traits I've seen in people with AS, it might go some way to prove that either there are two syndromes, or the whole thing's a bollocks. Or maybe it's just that the AS residence I sold my youth to was a bollocks.

[Axel1917]

I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome when I was younger, but I find it irrelevant now. I have lots of friends and I don't have trouble getting along with other people or understanding what their facial expressions mean (I never had problems understanding what facial expressions mean.). In fact, very few people know I have Asperger's Syndrome and the average person cannot tell that I even have it. I also did very well in school and was widely regarded as "one of the smartest people around" by many classmates, whether they actually liked me or not (but then again, some people with Asperger's Syndrome are said to have high intelligence.).

Sometimes I speak very quickly, but I now manage to catch myself doing this and I correct myself (hell, my brain can process information much more quickly than I can convey it via speech.). I also don't do this nearly as often as I used to.

I either overcame whatever symptoms I had or I was misdiagnosed due to having a rather cynical attitude during that time in my life.

The only irritating thing I find about autism is the fact that the spectrum is so damn broad and people with extremely high intelligence get lumped together with mentally challenged people under the label of "autistic."

I think that being able to communicate effectively with people is a political question, for you can't win people over to socialism if you make them feel awkward or if they cannot understand you. I have done my best to overcome any perceived problem associated with Asperger's Syndrome due to this outlook of mine, although I don't really think the whole "disorder" applies to me.

[More Fire for the People]

#1 Lead a 'normal' life, socialize and all that, when they know that your condition hinders these things more than it helps?
I sympathize with autistics on this front. I have a social anxiety disorder. And while my social relationships with autistics frustrate me, I feel for their plight.

[redSHARP]

i dont have autism, but i do have poor motor skills, so people always knock my clumsiness and poor hand writing. i always try my fucking best damn it, but these fucking teachers dont really get it. i sit there, pratically handcrafting a work of art of an essay, but it comes out as scribbles and i get points off. does effort count anymore?!

i also have speech problems, which is ironic since i am a decent public speaker, but in some cases i mix words up in my head and mis pronounce words constantly, then my friends jump on me for it. i laugh it off, but sometimes it does hurt.


i just want to do things right sometimes!! what do i have to do to be able to speak better? why cant i spell as well (i go over every post with a fine tooth come to check spelling)? why cant i draw or do anything involving writing utensils?

so i guess i do get frustrated.

[rednordman]

People are wankers mate. Full stop. I dont know whether or not i'v got a tiny bit of autism or aspergers, but sometimes (like all humans) I make mistakes and many come across as struggling with spelling, speaking and stuff. Not all the time though and I have got a lot better as i'v got older, so I thinks its simply because of crushingly low confidence and self-esteme growing up (at high-school mainly).

As a kid, my mother thought i got dislexia, but after seeing a specialist at primary school, the specialist came to the conclusion that i was alright, so that was for that. In the years since (15years or so) people have often tried to suggest that i may have a little bit of aspergers. Now ok, i can accept that people like to seem helpfull, understanding and look like doctors infront of people, but the problem is that the moment they suggest things like this at your person, your stigmatised.

Its as if all of a sudden, people have a concrete reason to look down on you. This may not be said out loud but from my own experience, you can strongly sense it. It goes back to this traditional 'your different' sort of mentality.

This upsets me alot because though im A LOT better now, I can see it in other people and notice how they are treated, and just think it is a mosterous injustice.

What also amazes me about other peoples reactions, is how the ones that state that they 'understand' are usually the most antaganising ones. Its like they want the respect and image of being understanding, but also think it gives them the right to take the piss as well.

Another thing I have noticed aswell, is how people say that its no big deal and that it doesnt mean that much (which is actually true), then critizise you and expect you to say nothing in return. When you defend yourself, they cannot accept it, and look at you like you are totally out of order for doing so.

[piet11111]

...when people expect you to:

#1 Lead a 'normal' life, socialize and all that, when they know that your condition hinders these things more than it helps?

my parents are making a big fuss about me drinking at home (8 beers or more) and try to get me to go into bars no matter how often i explain that i hate bars because they are way too crowded and are much too expensive they even ignore me saying i would end up drinking much more if i would go to a bar too !
i do not blame them for this they are just ignorant about why i dislike bars they just think i am autistic and anti-social



#2 Make fun of your poor motor skills even when you tell them of your condition over and over?

i fuck up my speech because i think faster then i can talk also my handwriting is shit.
if i try to slow down my thinking process to allow me to talk normally i just lose my train of thought.
but fortunately for me i do not get made fun of (that i know of)



#3 Expect great academic results, disregarding your condition?

i am actually a great student provided i do not get bored with the subject.




How do you handle such people? Trouble is, sometimes even well-meaning people tend to annoy you with awkward questions over and over, and this is especially frustrating when they know about your problem. I can understand strangers doing this -- ignorance is their excuse -- but it hurts when people who claim to 'love' you (including friends and families) do this many times over.

the only thing that gets me is when my parents are trying to socialize me by saying i should go out into the bars no matter how often i explain them why i do not want to.
oh i am 23 just so you know and me living with my parents is for mutual financial reasons i pay rent and groceries so both our living costs are lowered this way as life is expensive enough and i will just save money until i want/have to move out.